Pressing charges against a registered sex offender?

[ernie]

Indeed much applause on this end for going ahead and pressing charges. That is step 1.

Step 2a may be to make sure she changes here habits. She hadn't run into the guy for awhile and has now done so. He will be on the lookout for her again. Change where you shop and if necessary where she lives.

Step 2b is to get self defense training. This can be invaluable for anyone and especially women. Knowing how to get out of any grip (when to stomp, which way to twist to use the attackers body against them etc) is important. In fact one of the main reasons my 7 and 5 year old are in karate are to learn those skills. And let me tell you when performed properly it is hard for a grown man to even hold onto a skinny little 6 year old girl (It's part of their testing that they have to legitimately get away from their Sensei). As I said everyone should have it not just women and kids.

[4X4]

Originally Posted by ernie

Indeed much applause on this end for going ahead and pressing charges. That is step 1.

Step 2a may be to make sure she changes here habits. She hadn't run into the guy for awhile and has now done so. He will be on the lookout for her again. Change where you shop and if necessary where she lives.

Step 2b is to get self defense training. This can be invaluable for anyone and especially women. Knowing how to get out of any grip (when to stomp, which way to twist to use the attackers body against them etc) is important. In fact one of the main reasons my 7 and 5 year old are in karate are to learn those skills. And let me tell you when performed properly it is hard for a grown man to even hold onto a skinny little 6 year old girl (It's part of their testing that they have to legitimately get away from their Sensei). As I said everyone should have it not just women and kids.

What do you have them taking? And how old were they when you enrolled them? My daughter is only 2, so obviously it's still way too early, but when she's old enough, she'll be taking a martial art. Creeps and pervs beware.

edit* oops, just noticed that you said karate. Was that your choice for a reason? I've been kinda looking around, and have been considering Hapkido. And yeah, I want to know how old your girls were when you enrolled them.

[prarieboy]

Originally Posted by 4X4

What do you have them taking? And how old were they when you enrolled them? My daughter is only 2, so obviously it's still way too early, but when she's old enough, she'll be taking a martial art. Creeps and pervs beware.

edit* oops, just noticed that you said karate. Was that your choice for a reason? I've been kinda looking around, and have been considering Hapkido. And yeah, I want to know how old your girls were when you enrolled them.

If you want to learn techniques to disable someone quickly I think Hapkido would trump Karate. Karate is more of a fighting/defensive skill.

[Rathji]

Originally Posted by 4X4

What do you have them taking? And how old were they when you enrolled them? My daughter is only 2, so obviously it's still way too early, but when she's old enough, she'll be taking a martial art. Creeps and pervs beware.

edit* oops, just noticed that you said karate. Was that your choice for a reason? I've been kinda looking around, and have been considering Hapkido. And yeah, I want to know how old your girls were when you enrolled them.

Its likely not as early as you think, my 4 year old started Karate yesterday.

[T@T]

Times have sure changed, back home in the early 70's a guy about 30 fondled a girl about 14 on a ferris wheel, cops wouldn't/couldn't do anything so the big brother beat the crap out of him and put a sheep on his front porch...true story.

[CaptainCrunch]

Sometimes the woman's self defense courses are better then a martial discipline. They not only teach the proper mindset, but they also teach you the dirty tricks and in close tactics that they are going to need.

I do agree with Hapkido, and there are some excellent teachers in this city, and its a good inclose nasty little fighting discipline. There is also a course on woman's self defense at Studio Group Martial Arts that a friend on mind took and took a lot away from.

The best defense to be honest is situational awareness. That means simple things like when you're alone don't wear your earphones or text. Avoid unpopulated areas, or areas with obstructions and scenery blockages. things like Alley's take away your options. Carry something noisy with you. If you blast someone in the face with an air horn it will incapacitate them. If a girl is leaving work at night, get them to change into sensible shoes.

A big one that I learned. if your wearing a jacket, don't do it all the way up or zip it all the way up. If you get grabbed its easy to leave them with an empty coat and a couple of seconds worth of space.

If as a woman you do get grabbed. Attack the larger and more vulnerable parts of the body. The groin area, the shin. If you can't get at the face go after the ears (Its extremely painful) or the throat.

If you don't have a noise maker scream, scream scream.

BTW the knee is the greatest thing to go after if the person is protecting their groin.

Just little tricks.

Karate doesn't work all that well in these situations. The attacker wants to get in close and grab. If they get in close your pretty well done.

Anyways just some things I've picked up along the way.

[ernie]

Originally Posted by 4X4

What do you have them taking? And how old were they when you enrolled them? My daughter is only 2, so obviously it's still way too early, but when she's old enough, she'll be taking a martial art. Creeps and pervs beware.

edit* oops, just noticed that you said karate. Was that your choice for a reason? I've been kinda looking around, and have been considering Hapkido. And yeah, I want to know how old your girls were when you enrolled them.

My daughter just turned 5 when she started. My son was 4. The choice was really because it was what was offered at the Y and we wanted my daughter who was quite shy to gain some confidence (boy has she ever). After a few weeks of training a boy that had been bugging her for awhile called her a name. It was the last straw and she, well, destroyed him. She got sent to the principal's office and of course shouldn't have been using what she learned but EVERYONE was actually quite proud of her for standing up for herself. She'd testing for 5th Kyu soon (full green). The little boy and her are good friends now. My son needed to gain control (still working on that). He'll be testing for his yellow soon.

Their Sensei/Soke is quite remarkable (to me). He's only mid twenties but holds various Dan levels in 5 different disciplines. At 13 years old or so he decided that he was not pleased with the level of instruction offered in the area and began creating his own karate (American Kaeru-Do Karate). He's been running his own dojo in the area for the last couple of years and he's great with the younger kids. More telling is that his students are consistently at the top of the pack during tournaments.

The added bonus is they respect Sensei soooo much that if they misbehave they have to self-report to Sensei. They don't want to do that so it really does make them think before they act. Given they are little, he has at times taken their belts until behaviour improves and they then have to earn it back. It's effective. My daughter loves it and has classes 3 nights a week. She wasn't enamored with it until she got her yellow and had to start sparring. She loves that...my almost 7 year old 45 pound girl puts aside her girly girl princess mentality for that one hour and punches and kicks and blocks. Well she does have to wear pink gear but other than that there are no signs of the girly girl.


To above it really depends on the instructor. Many martial arts instructors will also do self defense and show those dirty tricks. There is a difference between the martial art and self defense but in our case the Sensei mixes it together in the kids training as part of curriculum. For women yes I'd lean towards a concentration on self defense to be sure but you also wouldn't go amiss with some more former martial arts training either. Or go with a more self defense discipline like Aikido. If the attacker gets in close you are not done. It's not ideal but there are techniques to deal with that that are very effective. It's one of things our kids had to pass to gets advanced...how to get away when you have already been grabbed. You also have to be careful with lumping karate into one umbrella. Many different schools that concentrate and draw on different things.

[BloodFetish]

Originally Posted by T@T

Times have sure changed, back home in the early 70's a guy about 30 fondled a girl about 14 on a ferris wheel, cops wouldn't/couldn't do anything so the big brother beat the crap out of him and put a sheep on his front porch...true story.

Yes, being able to compensate my victim with livestock after a savage beating is much preferable to getting the police involved.

Ah, those were the days.

[Coys1882]

Ark - follow him around with your own boner in sweatpants and see how he likes it!

[Ice]

A sex offender following your girlfriend for years who has clearly flaunted an erection isn't enough for a restraining order?

I currently have a restraining order for a somewhat similar situation. The sex offender covered under the "agents" portion of the restraining order (now a criminal protective order after a conviction for violating it) masturbates at young women. The problem is, law enforcement hands are somewhat tied unless the restraining order is violated. At the same time, the district attorney is convinced this guy is a future rapist when the thrill of his current behavior wears off. My advice would be to go after the restraining order so if he goes anywhere near your girlfriend he will be arrested. Sexual deviancy like this can't be ignored and it's rare that someone is successfully rehabilitated. Don't take chances.

[Ark2]

Well, she and I went down to the police station yesterday morning. She positively ID'ed him out of the photo line-up and then she did her recorded interview. The police then arrested this person about 2 hours ago for criminal harassment so we will see what happens next.

[bc-chris]

Originally Posted by Ark2

That's not very likely. The police already visited the guy and he denied everything (naturally). This whole thing just pisses me off that she has to go through this, but if it keeps him away from her and other women then it will be worth it. I just hate the idea that he will view her as a threat to him now.

Ark2

does the store/mall have any sort of video surveillance? video evidence can be convincing at times

this situation reminds me of a program we started when i was in university... it was called 'walk safe' and the whole point of it was that there was a group of people that were 'on call' to walk you to your vehicles after late night classes to ensure no creeps would 'bug' you. maybe where she works could do something similar - or at least have the employees all walk to their vehicles together at the end of the night? if she's in a mall then maybe mall security could help out? just a few thoughts.

[Nage Waza]

All martial arts are good to take, but the reality is many will do very little when it comes to actually defending yourself. Practitioners must spar and compete and should take another complimentary martial art if they want to be effective fighters. The vast majority of people that take a martial art train a bit, than do nothing with it. This will do absolutely nothing for you.

There is no martial art that will teach you to effectively disarm someone, instead teach your kids to run, scream or drop like a sack of bricks.

The greatest lesson is to teach someone to be aware, avoid dangerous places and situations, and even to carry a weapon.

[MrMastodonFarm]

Originally Posted by Nage Waza

All martial arts are good to take, but the reality is many will do very little when it comes to actually defending yourself. Practitioners must spar and compete and should take another complimentary martial art if they want to be effective fighters. The vast majority of people that take a martial art train a bit, than do nothing with it. This will do absolutely nothing for you.

There is no martial art that will teach you to effectively disarm someone, instead teach your kids to run, scream or drop like a sack of bricks.

The greatest lesson is to teach someone to be aware, avoid dangerous places and situations, and even to carry a weapon.

What to do if about to be molested?

Drop like a sack of bricks.

[4X4]

Originally Posted by Nage Waza

All martial arts are good to take, but the reality is many will do very little when it comes to actually defending yourself. Practitioners must spar and compete and should take another complimentary martial art if they want to be effective fighters. The vast majority of people that take a martial art train a bit, than do nothing with it. This will do absolutely nothing for you.

There is no martial art that will teach you to effectively disarm someone, instead teach your kids to run, scream or drop like a sack of bricks.

The greatest lesson is to teach someone to be aware, avoid dangerous places and situations, and even to carry a weapon.

LOL

Carry a weapon, eh? So in the case of, say, a 15 year old girl, a few years of martial arts training will be useless, so Dad might as well just buy her a knife? Gun? Bear spray?

Here you go, honey. Forget all that stuff you learned about snapping a guy's hand off you when he grabs you, and just carry this switchblade.

[Nage Waza]

Originally Posted by MrMastodonFarm

What to do if about to be molested?

Drop like a sack of bricks.

If you are in a safe place, with other people around, than yes, drop. It is widely recommended as a great way to deal with a predator. You drop and scream, they have to run away, since you are no longer going along with them.

[RedMileDJ]

Originally Posted by Ark2

Well, she and I went down to the police station yesterday morning. She positively ID'ed him out of the photo line-up and then she did her recorded interview. The police then arrested this person about 2 hours ago for criminal harassment so we will see what happens next.

Happy to hear this. Keep us updated.

[DuffMan]

Originally Posted by Nage Waza

All martial arts are good to take, but the reality is many will do very little when it comes to actually defending yourself. Practitioners must spar and compete and should take another complimentary martial art if they want to be effective fighters. The vast majority of people that take a martial art train a bit, than do nothing with it. This will do absolutely nothing for you.

There is no martial art that will teach you to effectively disarm someone, instead teach your kids to run, scream or drop like a sack of bricks.

The greatest lesson is to teach someone to be aware, avoid dangerous places and situations, and even to carry a weapon.

Not true. My kid took Tae Kwan Do for over 5 years, and she can still punch and block a lot better than a girl that has never taken anything. She's been out of it for a year, but I'm glad she took what she did. Plus I have no plans of arming her with a weapon, what country do you think we live in?

[Nage Waza]

Originally Posted by 4X4

LOL

Carry a weapon, eh? So in the case of, say, a 15 year old girl, a few years of martial arts training will be useless, so Dad might as well just buy her a knife? Gun? Bear spray?

Here you go, honey. Forget all that stuff you learned about snapping a guy's hand off you when he grabs you, and just carry this switchblade.

That is the point. Obviously, most people are not carrying weapons. So if you are someone who thinks their Karate lessons are going to keep you safe, than you might be surprised. Awareness and avoidance are the best defense, after that weapons. If you must resort to fighting, good luck. Someone well trained with a weapon, that is aware and ready to use it, is much more dangerous than the average predator.

And good luck ever 'snapping a guy's hand off'...much of the stuff similar to that taught in martial arts classes is junk and rather funny. Kicking a knee, a shot under the nose, a knee to the balls, all these things that might make people feel safe won't do a thing if the user does not spar.

Screaming and dropping is much more effective than standing on your feet and 'allowing' someone to pull them into the bushes.

There are a handful of good techniques that might help, but avoidance is the top technique.

[4X4]

Originally Posted by Nage Waza

That is the point. Obviously, most people are not carrying weapons. So if you are someone who thinks their Karate lessons are going to keep you safe, than you might be surprised. Awareness and avoidance are the best defense, after that weapons. If you must resort to fighting, good luck. Someone well trained with a weapon, that is aware and ready to use it, is much more dangerous than the average predator.

And good luck ever 'snapping a guy's hand off'...much of the stuff similar to that taught in martial arts classes is junk and rather funny. Kicking a knee, a shot under the nose, a knee to the balls, all these things that might make people feel safe won't do a thing if the user does not spar.

Screaming and dropping is much more effective than standing on your feet and 'allowing' someone to pull them into the bushes.

There are a handful of good techniques that might help, but avoidance is the top technique.

The whole point of taking a martial art is to train with it. Use it. Advance. What do you think happens at a dojo? People sit at desks and read books on how to kick?

I don't think there's any point in talking about this. You seem to think that arming a young person is a good idea, instead of giving them lessons on how to defend themselves and fight when necessary.