This is nothing compared to the vasectomy. You walk in the little room with the doctor (at least you hope he's a doctor, you don't ask for a copy of his degree, do doctors have a degree? Well the doctor certificate).
Its just you and him. He says take of your pants and underwear and lay on the tilty bed thing. Its like a dentists chair but that light reflector thing is around your crotch, not your head.
You are sitting there with your balls and wang hanging out. Its pretty uncomfortable because for the past week or so, you debated shaving the area, but will that look gay, don't want to trim to much, but you don't want a ZZTop thing going on.
Then what do you do with your hands, you are compelled to cover your junk with your hands as he is getting ready at the counter, do you just cover the shaft with your hand? Will he think your masturbating? Just hold the wang so he can see the balls? You are as exposed as you will ever be.
Then he starts pulling things out of the autoclave, and the freezing needle. Then he pulls out some brown disinfectant liquid. He goops that on right away, splishsplashing everywhere, its really warm, then it starts pouring right down your crack and now it feels like you wetchit yourself.
The needle comes out. "This will only hurt when the freezing moves up the vas (or something) it will take about 10 seconds, here we go." This ain't so bad then that pain hits, you aren't strapped down. You have an intense instinct to strike the doctor, so you put your hands up by your face to avoid swinging, you want to protect yourself and nothing is stopping you. Rinse and repeat with the next ball.
This is followed by him rooting around in your ball sac. After he snipped one side the tube slipped back into the sac hole and he couldn't get it out, sort of like a hoody tie that is lost back into the fabric. He had to stick instruments in there to find it.
ANyway the rest is a blur but you get the point.
You know how in some movies you always get mad becaues there isn't enough back story on why a character acts a certain way..
I have finally figured fotze out.
__________________ "In brightest day, in blackest night / No evil shall escape my sight / Let those who worship evil's might / Beware my power, Green Lantern's light!"
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My sack and any kind of a sharp object are mutually exclusive.
Every girl I've talked to tells me that guys should get chopped because its minor surgery.
Apparently they don't understand that next to our eyeballs which we use to check out hot chicks, our boys are something that we've been trained to protect from birth. When you play soccer and you're standing in front of a penalty kicker you don't shield your head, you cup the boys. When we play any sport we wear a cup, even in the old days we didn't wear helmets but we sure wore sack protection.
In any fight you learn the Wax on Wax off technique because we would rather take a base ball bat to the face then a boot to the baby makers.
And they expect us to cheerfully lie there while some quack slits open the jublies and roots around inside with a sharp object.
Well I say no thank you.
__________________
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
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My sack and any kind of a sharp object are mutually exclusive.
Every girl I've talked to tells me that guys should get chopped because its minor surgery.
Apparently they don't understand that next to our eyeballs which we use to check out hot chicks, our boys are something that we've been trained to protect from birth. When you play soccer and you're standing in front of a penalty kicker you don't shield your head, you cup the boys. When we play any sport we wear a cup, even in the old days we didn't wear helmets but we sure wore sack protection.
In any fight you learn the Wax on Wax off technique because we would rather take a base ball bat to the face then a boot to the baby makers.
And they expect us to cheerfully lie there while some quack slits open the jublies and roots around inside with a sharp object.
Well I say no thank you.
It's minor surgery until you go and help move the pool table in your basement the week after you have it done. Then you herniate the thing and get to walk around like you have elephantitis of the nuts for the next few weeks. Good times.
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This is nothing compared to the vasectomy. You walk in the little room with the doctor (at least you hope he's a doctor, you don't ask for a copy of his degree, do doctors have a degree? Well the doctor certificate).
Its just you and him. He says take of your pants and underwear and lay on the tilty bed thing. Its like a dentists chair but that light reflector thing is around your crotch, not your head.
You are sitting there with your balls and wang hanging out. Its pretty uncomfortable because for the past week or so, you debated shaving the area, but will that look gay, don't want to trim to much, but you don't want a ZZTop thing going on.
Then what do you do with your hands, you are compelled to cover your junk with your hands as he is getting ready at the counter, do you just cover the shaft with your hand? Will he think your masturbating? Just hold the wang so he can see the balls? You are as exposed as you will ever be.
Then he starts pulling things out of the autoclave, and the freezing needle. Then he pulls out some brown disinfectant liquid. He goops that on right away, splishsplashing everywhere, its really warm, then it starts pouring right down your crack and now it feels like you wetchit yourself.
The needle comes out. "This will only hurt when the freezing moves up the vas (or something) it will take about 10 seconds, here we go." This ain't so bad then that pain hits, you aren't strapped down. You have an intense instinct to strike the doctor, so you put your hands up by your face to avoid swinging, you want to protect yourself and nothing is stopping you. Rinse and repeat with the next ball.
This is followed by him rooting around in your ball sac. After he snipped one side the tube slipped back into the sac hole and he couldn't get it out, sort of like a hoody tie that is lost back into the fabric. He had to stick instruments in there to find it.
ANyway the rest is a blur but you get the point.
Way too descriptive. It made me cringe. I do not want anymore kids, but this pretty much desciribes how I will feel. Yuck. I was awake for cardiac ablation twice and didn't feel queazy at all except when they pull the cathators out from your groin that were in your heart, watched the whole thing on a video screen, but I think I would puke at my vasectomy.
Way too descriptive. It made me cringe. I do not want anymore kids, but this pretty much desciribes how I will feel. Yuck. I was awake for cardiac ablation twice and didn't feel queazy at all except when they pull the cathators out from your groin that were in your heart, watched the whole thing on a video screen, but I think I would puke at my vasectomy.
I know, I hear it isn't bad at all, but ughhh
There's also the possibility that things heal up and grow back together, which would mean having to do it twice.......
WTF? Where did you get yours done? Did they give you a stick to bite after a shot of brandy and use a seashell as a scalpel? I went to the Vaz Man on 14th Street and dude was a like cross between a ninja and a NASCAR pit crew. I was in and out in about 20mins and didn't even need the Tylenol 3s.
BAM - Risk free creampies.
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Jesus tap dancing Christ. I was considering doing this but no way I can now. I'll have this story running through my head the whole time including the week before the appt.
Could this be what Tupac and the Outlaw Immortals were talking about all these years.. ?
NSFW language
__________________ "In brightest day, in blackest night / No evil shall escape my sight / Let those who worship evil's might / Beware my power, Green Lantern's light!"
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Jesus tap dancing Christ. I was considering doing this but no way I can now. I'll have this story running through my head the whole time including the week before the appt.
Wow.....
Seriously - it's not that bad. I know a bunch of guys at work and buddies who have all been snipped and it doesn't hurt at all. It's just a dull ache for a day or two. It's worth the discomfort for end result.
It's not the pain I'm worried about, it's some doctor digging around my sack with sharp objects that makes me want to puke rainbows. I'd have to drop a bottle of Adavan before I could even walk into the appt.
Yes, end results are very worthwhile, guess I'll have to keep that in mind.
It's not the pain I'm worried about, it's some doctor digging around my sack with sharp objects that makes me want to puke rainbows. I'd have to drop a bottle of Adavan before I could even walk into the appt.
Yes, end results are very worthwhile, guess I'll have to keep that in mind.
HAHA - besides the tool used to make the tiny incision - there is nothing sharp used. He technically doesn't even really 'enter' the incision.
