Quote:
Originally posted by Flames Draft Watcher+Feb 3 2005, 04:09 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Flames Draft Watcher @ Feb 3 2005, 04:09 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>
Quote:
Originally posted by Reaper@Feb 3 2005, 10:06 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-FlamesAddiction
|
Quote:
@Feb 3 2005, 01:08 AM
Even though you were just kidding, I wanted to say that; no, nothing has happened recently that made me want to start this thread - well, nothing physical. I have sort of been seeing another person, but have not slept with her. It won't happen either since the person is moving - although I still feel like I'm cheating.
|
Maybe the reason that you feel like you're cheating is because you probably are.
In my opinion, it's not the sex that gets people so wound up about cheating but the emotional aspect. Most people expect exclusivity in the area of emotional intimacy when they are in a committed relationship.
When you get to the point where you would go meet up with another woman and hide it from your significant other then it is cheating because you're giving the emotional intimacy that you are supposed to reserve for your girlfriend/wife/WHY and giving it to another person.
Cheating is far, far more than just sex.
|
A very good point.
I think I remember hearing about a study or survey where men considered "cheating" to be physical and women had a much broader definition including talking intimately in a chatroom par example. [/b][/quote]
Yeah, I mostly look at cheating as the honesty factor, especially as I have been in some very untraditional relationships.
I think it's cheating when you aren't honest about what your doing and how it makes you feel. The lie is the worst part, the lie is the betrayal. It's not all abut the act. You could have an intimate relationship with no sex and that could still be cheating. What are you getting from this person that the other person isn't fulfilling? And have you brought up your problems with your partner or are you just expecting them to read your mind? (Not necessarily to you FlamesAddiction, just thinking out loud) Why do you feel it necessary to hide any action from your significant other?
Cheating for me is about the lying. If my partner had sex with someone and told me right away out of guilt or duty or sense of honor and morals I would forgive them (after obviously having a serious talk and making sure it was something they did feel was wrong and wouldn't do again). If they cheated on me and I found out another way, it would be over then and there. Even the word 'cheat' implies trying to get away with something bad.
As for me, it totally depends on how you define cheating (and I know that makes it sound like a yes, but it's really a very complicated situation that would require pages of text to explain and a bio on my life I'm sure most of you wouldn't want to hear)
And even if you still considered that example cheating, then only once. It may not be as exciting to walk away, but it feels good almost immediately, and then twice as good when you come home and snuggle up to your sweetheart.
It's always feels good to know your still desired by others (especially for us men who don't get hit on the ways women do) but probably best to leave it at that, just knowing.
