Wedding Problem (Opinions needed)

[Teh_Bandwagoner]

Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch

Boil up a big pot of mac and cheese without the cheese for people who straggle.

Wrong way around. Liquefied cheese for all, I say!

[Dion]

Your brother is correct in this situation. People who don't respond to RSVP's are rude and inconsiderate. They fail to realise that a lot planning goes into setting up a wedding. If they show up very politely tell them that since they didn't respond to the RSVP we didn't plan a plate for you at the reception/dinner afterwards.

[WindomURL]

Have your mother email them a link to this very useful article on etiquette.

[Rhettzky]

$13,000 just for dinner? Holy balls. If anyone didn't RSVP just keep an empty table right in the middle of all the others so they can watch everyone eat. Then, after the main course, bring out a plate of Big Mac's for the non RSVPers... garnished with your pubes.

[troutman]

Will your mother be accepting their $100 wedding gifts?

[4X4]

Originally Posted by fotze

To be quite honest that would be much more preferrable to me than bland chicken breast or 99% of all wedding meals I have ever had.

I agree. By far, the worst part of weddings (besides having to sit through the ceremony, or wqorse, being part of the wedding party and having to STAND through the ceremony) is the food. A couple slices of roast beef, an ice cream scoop of mashed potatoes, three cooked carrots and two beans, and a whole lot of empty real estate on the plate.

I usually pregame wedding receptions by hitting A&W and chowing two teens.

[sadora]

Depending on how flexible your caterer is, you can see about confirming the numbers at the reception. They might be able to do it if you're using an on site caterer since they are likely to have extra food there anyway. Otherwise you might be looking at having to deal with some angry/hungry guests. At $100/per plate it's not worth over ordering on the meals because if those guests don't show up you're gonna be stuck with some very expensive left overs.

[Dion]

Originally Posted by 4X4

I agree. By far, the worst part of weddings (besides having to sit through the ceremony, or wqorse, being part of the wedding party and having to STAND through the ceremony) is the food. A couple slices of roast beef, an ice cream scoop of mashed potatoes, three cooked carrots and two beans, and a whole lot of empty real estate on the plate.

Agreed! A few weeks back a good friend of mine got married and they had a buffet style dinner for their reception afterwards. After everyone had served themselves it was announced there was more food if anyone was still hungry. Funny thing was that no one went back for seconds.

[Eastern Girl]

Originally Posted by Bring_Back_Shantz

Okay, I agree with everyone else, so I don't think you need more advice on that front, but to add something to the thread I'd just like to say:

$100 FOR DINNER!?!?!?! WHAT KIND OF CRAZY EXTRAVAGANT WEDDING IS THIS!?!?!?

It's my moms fiancees first marriage and his parents wanted to go all out. And, they are all about appearances...

Originally Posted by ken0042

The other thing is to check with the catering company. They might have a certain percentage over and above what you order for this exact contingency. And if its that much per plate, it would be to their advantage to have an extra 10 meals ready so they can give you a final number that is higher.

I called them and they said they can, at most, accomodate about five unexpected guests.

And on that note, we can't really have any extra tables, as the room apparently can only hold a certain number of them and we are already at the max.

Originally Posted by fotze

To be quite honest that would be much more preferrable to me than bland chicken breast or 99% of all wedding meals I have ever had.

I sampled it all. I have, by no means, an expert palate, but it's good, good stuff, unlike any wedding food i've ever had. They really did go all out. Awesome extravagant food, open bar, it's a very lavish affair, quite the opposite of what my family is accustomed. We're like the Bundys.

It should be a good night.

[4X4]

Originally Posted by Dion

Agreed! A few weeks back a good friend of mine got married and they had a buffet style dinner for their reception afterwards. After everyone had served themselves it was announced there was more food if anyone was still hungry. Funny thing was that no one went back for seconds.

Hell yeah. The best wedding I went to (food wise) was my cousin's last year. She had a guy come with a portable roaster-spit thing and he served up beef and ham. A slicing table and you could have as much as you wanted. Then the salads and vegetables were buffet style.
I swear they saved money on booze because of that. Everyone was so stuffed that beer and wine consumption must have dropped significantly.

[Coach]

Am I the only one here that absolutely LOVES wedding food?

[4X4]

Originally Posted by MattyC

Am I the only one here that absolutely LOVES wedding food?

Yes. Yes you are. Are you homeless by chance?

[Bring_Back_Shantz]

Originally Posted by MattyC

Am I the only one here that absolutely LOVES wedding food?

Nope, I love it too.
Specifically because it's free!

[Coach]

Lol no. Roast beef with a jus man.....nothing better

[Pablothegreat]

Have your mom send out one more email to the people that didn't RSVP, but make sure the message is that they will be missed, and that no accomodations have been made to include them at the reception.

They are still welcome to the ceremony, but there will be no seating or food set aside for them in the evening.

That way, you have officially excluded them from the meal/reception. Your mom should not feel guilty at all. Hope she enjoys her day.

[Russic]

absolutely do not buy those people dinner. Like it was said before, the bride should not be spending her time worrying about buying food for people that didn't even have the common decency to rsvp. People like that expect to walk all over others. Tell them they are welcome to attend the service (standing at the back) but dinner is for registered guests only. No need to be overly rude, even though they didn't extend you the same courtesy.

[ken0042]

Originally Posted by Pablothegreat

Have your mom send out one more email to the people that didn't RSVP, but make sure the message is that they will be missed, and that no accomodations have been made to include them at the reception.

They are still welcome to the ceremony, but there will be no seating or food set aside for them in the evening.

I think that's a great idea. A very positive email like that would be well received by those who didn't respond because they can't make it, and will get the point across to those who are going to see how they feel that day.

[arsenal]

Let them eat cake....

[Eastern Girl]

Originally Posted by Pablothegreat

Have your mom send out one more email to the people that didn't RSVP, but make sure the message is that they will be missed, and that no accomodations have been made to include them at the reception.

They are still welcome to the ceremony, but there will be no seating or food set aside for them in the evening.

That way, you have officially excluded them from the meal/reception. Your mom should not feel guilty at all. Hope she enjoys her day.

That's something I will run by my mom, see what she says. From my perspective, it's a win. She's not being rude, she's expressing her regret of not being able to see those people and she gets the point across that she won't be making any special arrangements for stragglers.

Great stuff, thanks.

[SeeGeeWhy]

Is the ceremony, dinner and reception all happening in the same place?

If not, you could inform them that they are welcome to attend the ceremony and reception as the dinner has already had all of its arrangements finalized.