As drunk as i was, it was an offer i wasn't going to turn down. I head to the washroom and i assume Kirsten told Ashley the same thing as the innocent flirting, became a bona fide effort on both our parts to make it happen.
At which point I realized, that perhaps wandering in to the ladies washroom at Filthy McNasty's was an ill thought out proposition. No matter, headlong and onward I ventured into as yet unexplored territory. I'm still talking about the washroom, not the woman, but I'm getting to that.
Unable to locate my quarry, I purchase a bathroom condom from a vending machine, that is, inexplicably, located in the ladies washroom. It seemed like a good idea at the time, you know the old Scouts' motto "Be Prepared."
Pretty quick after that, Ashley and I started making out a bit between trying to maintain a conversation with Kirsten unsuccessfully. a few more jagger shots and jagger bombs later we figure heading to my place was the next step. Kirsten crashes on the couch and Ashley and I head to the bedroom for some fun.
It is at this point that Filthy McNasty's exacted her sweet revenge upon me. She was merciless. As the action intensified, I realized why I was unable to locate her in the women's washroom. She was a "switch hitter" as it were. Undaunted, I continued my progress and applied the vending machine condom.
At somepoint during the "consummation of the deal" a loud snap could be heard, like a rubberband just giving way to overly exerted force. I wondered what that could have been, but pushed the thought out of my mind to concentrate on the business at hand.
Big mistake.
So this leads to the question I had, How do I properly apologize to my favorite Lesbian for impregnating her best friend?
__________________ The Beatings Shall Continue Until Morale Improves!
This Post Has Been Distilled for the Eradication of Seemingly Incurable Sadness.
The World Ends when you're dead. Until then, you've got more punishment in store. - Flames Fans
If you thought this season would have a happy ending, you haven't been paying attention.
There should be a disclaimer at the start of this thread "Not a Threesome Story".. I want my money back.
__________________ "In brightest day, in blackest night / No evil shall escape my sight / Let those who worship evil's might / Beware my power, Green Lantern's light!"
If you really feel sleazy then you might as well keep at it. Buy your friend a porno movie. I'd suggest a selection from the epic "Where The Boys Aren't" series.
Added bonus: it sends the message that you are a modern, sensitive man and that you not only approve of her sexuality but you encourage her to explore it further.
