Yeah I'm always surprised at how little flack my kid (who's a spectrum kid) gets at school, I've seen a few instances of it, but not nearly what I'd expect for how different he acts sometimes. Lots of effort on education and empathy by the school. His teacher is so amazing this year, we even asked if she wanted to teach the next highest grade next year There's quite a few kids like that too, so maybe that means the general policy of integration actually is a good idea.
But can depend on the individual group of kids too, one of my son's friends moved to the Catholic school nearby because of bullying and general non-acceptance by her peers in my son's school.
As to the bench, I dunno.. My initial reaction is to agree that it's probably great up till about grade 5 where how one looks to others really starts to kick into gear.
__________________ Uncertainty is an uncomfortable position.
But certainty is an absurd one.
Weird, I went to elementary a long time ago and I don't remember a lot of (any?) bullying occuring in the later grades. The earlier grades I had some troubles, but I think a lot of kids went through the same.
Jr High though, wow that was another matter entirely.
I could see something like this working. Interesting idea.
I could see this working with young kids...Grade 3-4 and under. Maybe even up to 5-6. Most kids are still pretty decent then...I feel like kids only really turn into a-holes in junior high.
My daughter's in grade 4. I can already see which girls will probably turn into the mean girls. I really hope it doesn't happen, and I do think that the kids in our junior high are better than I remember, but they are definitely far from perfect at that age. I'm really not looking forward to those years.
My kids only in kindergarten, everybody is his friend. He would, know anyways, go sit with someone on the bench. But he also doesn't get it when someone doesn't want to a with him. Not sure how I feel about the bench, could work. All it would take would be for one of the cool kids to sit there I suppose.
What is a spectrum kid, have to do with autism? Never heard the term before otherwise.
I felt bad about that whole conversation because she felt that she was onto something brilliant that would fix the bullying problems of the world, and I burst out laughing when she said it.
This is right up there with not keeping score in soccer.
This does remind me of and interaction I had in Grade 2, and I actually remember it well. I was a pretty picked on kid, and had a lot of trouble interacting with other kids because I was such a spaz. During recess one day I wanted to play with some other boys that were playing with Star Wars action figures. I was crying because I was too shy to ask them if I could play with them. The teacher comes over and asks why I am crying and I tell her why. She says "Trevor, just go over and ask if you can play too."
So I do it, and the first thing that happens is the cool kid punches me right in the stomach, then I pissed my pants. I look back now and LOL, but I had a pretty rough ride for quite a few years. Being a young unpopular kid is tough enough, putting yourself on a big bright bench to expose your insecurities works great as a sad, tear jerking scene in a John Hughes film, but in reality, other kids are gonna jump all over it, and start calling you "bench buddy' until you snap.
I subbed in elementary for a couple years and was blown away at how much better kids treat each other nowadays. It is night and day compared to when I was in school.
My daughter would, and I know other kids in her school that would as well. Not to mention other members from the kid's "team" who are responsible for looking after each other.
Kids are not inherently evil, and if the social construct of the school is setup to reduce bullying the kids will follow suit.
I don't think I'm talking about bullying.
Sometimes kids can dislike another kid, but they don't end up bullying him.
I think that people have a warped understanding of how schools are working these days, especially in elementary. It sounds like we expect it to be exactly how it was when we were there in the 70s / 80s. The school my kids go to are completely different, and bullying is down significantly from where it was in my day. Maybe that's not all schools, but sounds like fotze's school is the same.
Same experience at my sons school. Bullying is taken VERY seriously now and is probably the easiest way to get in huge trouble. Kids are taught about bullying in Kindergarten now and are buddied up with an older kid. Anti-bullying has become part of the culture of the school and I have to admit that it works. Granted, my son goes to a K-4 school, but bullying doesn't exist at all.
Things like Columbine and suicides as a result of bullying have resulted in positive change.
Yes, facebook mass pile-on bullying has definitely showed me how nice they've become.
A) The subject is elementary school.
B) A news report or two is not indicative of the norm.
I know that you saw this thread as yet another opportunity to launch into the good ol' days again, but you are clearly out of touch with today's reality. Don't pretend you're not.
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This is right up there with not keeping score in soccer.
This does remind me of and interaction I had in Grade 2, and I actually remember it well. I was a pretty picked on kid, and had a lot of trouble interacting with other kids because I was such a spaz. During recess one day I wanted to play with some other boys that were playing with Star Wars action figures. I was crying because I was too shy to ask them if I could play with them. The teacher comes over and asks why I am crying and I tell her why. She says "Trevor, just go over and ask if you can play too."
So I do it, and the first thing that happens is the cool kid punches me right in the stomach, then I pissed my pants. I look back now and LOL, but I had a pretty rough ride for quite a few years. Being a young unpopular kid is tough enough, putting yourself on a big bright bench to expose your insecurities works great as a sad, tear jerking scene in a John Hughes film, but in reality, other kids are gonna jump all over it, and start calling you "bench buddy' until you snap.
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Weird, I went to elementary a long time ago and I don't remember a lot of (any?) bullying occuring in the later grades. The earlier grades I had some troubles, but I think a lot of kids went through the same.
Jr High though, wow that was another matter entirely.
I could see something like this working. Interesting idea.
How bullying worked in elementary for me was that you banded together to defeat bullies. I don't know why, my elementary years were so completely different. I was at several elementary schools as a kid and each had a slightly different but similar way to deal with bullies. I'm not sure if the same occurred for you.
If we had the bench in our day, kids might not go embrace whoever was on the bench, but if he was bullied at the bench, I'm sure we'd show up and bully the bully.
I feel like the same was happening happening (albeit a bit different) when I was doing summer programs a few years back. Groups of kids were fighting other kids if a single kid was bullied. At the same time some kids would take comments too seriously and get all bent out of shape (almost self bullying). Kids just want to be accepted, regardless.
B) A news report or two is not indicative of the norm.
I know that you saw this thread as yet another opportunity to launch into the good ol' days again, but you are clearly out of touch with today's reality. Don't pretend you're not.
I just think that the delivery system of bullying has changed, that's all. It used to be face to face, now it is done electronically. I saw what my niece went through on Facebook when she was 12-14 and it was pretty horrid stuff. Drink bleach, cut yourself, play in traffic....etc.
And yes, I am certainly not an authority on the current inner working of Elementary schools, as I don't have Elementary school kids. By the sounds of it, things are a lot different, which is good.
Things have changed in elementary schools, but you are correct. 12-14 year old girls are still completely psycho. Based upon personal experience, I would say that they are even worse now.
Things have changed in elementary schools, but you are correct. 12-14 year old girls are still completely psycho. Based upon personal experience, I would say that they are even worse now.
In my experience they are more insecure about themselves than when I was in school.
Digital age being a key factor in that, in my opinion.
There's quite a few kids like that too, so maybe that means the general policy of integration actually is a good idea.
