Favorite Quotes Thread

[ClubFlames]

"When a monkey nibbles on a penis.. its funny in any language" - Alan.. Hangover 2.

[To Be Quite Honest]

Originally Posted by EVERLAST

remember you friends fondly when they leave the room.

My wife

Fondle your friends before they leave the room. My wife.

Everlast

[Dion]

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.

[Yanda]

Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

- Rick Astley

[redforever]

"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."

"Never, never be afraid to do what's right, especially if the well-being of a person or animal is at stake. Society's punishments are small compared to the wounds we inflict on our soul when we look the other way."

both by Martin Luther King Jr.

[vanisleflamesfan]

"Pain or damage don’t end the world… or despair, or f’n beatings. The world ends when you’re dead. Until then, you’ve got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man, and give some back".

- Al Swearengen

[ah123]

When setting out on a journey, do not seek advice from those who have never left home -- Rumi

An individual has not begun to live until he can rise above the narrow horizons of his particular individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity. Every person must decide, at some point, whether they will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness. This is the judgment. Life’s most persistent and urgent question is, ’What are you doing for others?’
-- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

To a mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders -- Lao Tzu

[CaptainCrunch]

"The best form of defense is attack."
- Karl von Clausewitz

"In the absence of orders, go find something and kill it."
- Field Marshal Erwin Rommel

"Veni, vidi, vici."
(I came, I saw, I conquered)
- Julius Caesar

"Fixed fortifications are monuments to the stupidity of man."
- General George Patton Jr

If your enemy is secure at all points, be prepared for him. If he is in superior strength, evade him. If your opponent is temperamental, seek to irritate him. Pretend to be weak, that he may grow arrogant. If he is taking his ease, give him no rest. If his forces are united, separate them. If sovereign and subject are in accord, put division between them. Attack him where he is unprepared, appear where you are not expected.
- Sun Tzu, the Art of War

[calf]

You don't make friends with salad.

[To Be Quite Honest]

Just a few - mostly movie quotes

"Do or do not. There is no try." Yoda
"Yo lunchbox, hurry it up." Jay
"Tickets? Since when did they start charging for the bus? Didn't we used to ride that #### to school every morning for free?" Jay
"Go ahead, make my day." Dirty Harry
"You can't handle the truth!" Col. Nathan R. Jessep
"You know how to whistle, don't you, Steve? You just put your lips together and blow." Marie "Slim" Browning
"You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya, punk?" Dirty Harry
"A boy's best friend is his mother." Norman Bates
"Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer." Michael Corleone
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room!" President Merkin Muffley

In the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity.
Albert Einstein

They can conquer who believe they can.
Virgil

Men of genius are admired, men of wealth are envied, men of power are feared; but only men of character are trusted.
Unknown

Fight Club - Best Movie ever. It really made me re-think.

This is your life and it's ending one minute at a time.

Only after disaster can we be resurrected.

I am Jack's smirking revenge.

It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything.

You're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your ####ing khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.

Listen up, maggots. You are not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else.

The things you own end up owning you.

Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.

Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing. Like the first monkey shot into space.

If I didn't say anything, people always assumed the worst.

We're a generation of men raised by women. I'm wondering if another woman is really the answer we need.

We are all part of the same compost heap.

Like so many others, I had become a slave to the Ikea nesting instinct.

Worker bees can leave. Even drones can fly away. The Queen is their slave.

[malcolmk14]

Asked in the 1970's what he thought about the French Revolution, Chinese premier Zhou En-Lai said, "It's still too early to tell".

[Cheerio]

I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.
-Groucho Marx


Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever. That surrender, even the smallest act of giving up, stays with me. So when I feel like quitting, I ask myself, which would I rather live with?
Lance Armstrong


Everybody wants to know what I'm on. What am I on? I'm on my bike busting my ass six hours a day. What are you on?
Lance Armstrong

[V]

How about the entire movie "Office Space"

"I'm a people person gd-it!!"

[Drury18]

A good chunk of my favourite quotes come from Matthew Good's "The Handbook"

"Rule 1: Everyone gets a #### kicking. Maybe just to ensure that you don't spend your life thinking you're better then those who get ####-kicked everyday of theirs"

"Rule 2: Morality extends no further than acceptability. You will go as far as you are willing to go. One man's evil is another man's amusement park"

"Rule 15: No one remembers who you weren't. Just who you were. The realization of your true self far outweighs the consequences of unpopularity."

"Rule 16: Supreme beings are kind of like pets. They make you feel better when no one else will listen. Strangely enough, neither can respond. The need for something more then yourself ultimately diminishes the need for yourself."

[banffavenue]

"If you don't like the road you're on, start paving another one"

"If you want a rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain"

"It costs a lot of money to look this cheap"

"I always just thought if you see somebody without a smile, give'em yours!"

Dolly Parton FTW

[Bigtime]

About 4 years or so ago my buddy came up with this gem (right as Facebook was really starting to take off after opening up to the general public):

"Facebook is essentially the next step in the evolutionary cesspool of internet self-worship and personal whoredom."

And a favorite from a film:

"Listen, I'm a politician which means I'm a cheat and a liar, and when I'm not kissing babies I'm stealing their lollipops."

[WilsonFourTwo]

"Do you want fries with that"

- The guy that thought he was sooooo cool in High School.

"Be Fearful When Others Are Greedy and Greedy When Others Are Fearful"

- Warren Buffett

[WilsonFourTwo]

Originally Posted by Drury18

A good chunk of my favourite quotes come from Matthew Good's "The Handbook"

You sold a book today. Mr. Good owes you a thanks.

[Byrns]

“You tried your best and failed miserably. The lesson is: never try.”

“Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.”

“Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.”

[troutman]

Like many fly fishermen in western Montana where the summer days are almost Arctic in length, I often do not start fishing until the cool of the evening. Then in the Arctic half-light of the canyon, all existence fades to a being with my soul and memories and the sounds of the Big Blackfoot River and a four-count rhythm and the hope that a fish will rise. Eventually, all things merge into one, and a river runs through it. The river was cut by the world's great flood and runs over rocks from the basement of time. On some of those rocks are timeless raindrops. Under the rocks are the words, and some of the words are theirs. I am haunted by waters.

- Norman Maclean