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Old 02-11-2011, 02:41 PM   #21
VladtheImpaler
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I'm going to offer to pay for an office assistant to be sterilized...
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Old 02-11-2011, 02:45 PM   #22
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I'm going to take up smoking.
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Old 02-11-2011, 02:50 PM   #23
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Laughing at someone who got a parking ticket in a handicapped spot.
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Old 02-11-2011, 05:23 PM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch View Post
I'm going to take another step up the evolutionary ladder, thus making the rest of you a somewhat tasty yet greasy snack.
Damn it, CaptainCrunch beat me to the Lamarckian evolution joke.
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Old 02-11-2011, 05:33 PM   #25
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I think I'll celebrate my son's birthday instead.
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Old 02-11-2011, 05:39 PM   #26
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I'm going to celebrate by drinking. I'll let Mr Cliff Clavin explain:

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“Well, you see, Norm, it’s like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it’s the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.

And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.”
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Old 02-11-2011, 05:50 PM   #27
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Damn it, CaptainCrunch beat me to the Lamarckian evolution joke.
That's alright, I intend to evolve via Lysenkoism
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Old 02-11-2011, 11:46 PM   #28
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I'm going to finish extracting DNA from my Listeria monocytogenes isolates.
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Old 02-12-2011, 12:04 AM   #29
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I had a radioactive bunker (full of some high energy gamma emitters) attached to one of my labs. You want in there or should I hook you up with a cyclotron at a hospital?
Funny, I know exactly which lab you are talking about.

Darwin Day...taking the family to the San Diego Zoo to see the Galapagos tortoises.

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Old 02-12-2011, 01:16 AM   #30
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Off to the Sperm bank to spread my seed among dozens of unsuspecting woman.

Thus ensuring that CaptainCrunch and not the rest of you mundanes becomes the dominant species on this planet now and forever.
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Old 02-12-2011, 04:34 AM   #31
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Darwin's home (Down House) where he wrote On the Origin of Species is about a 45 minute drive from us. It is probably hideously busy today though.

My partner is a huge Darwin fan and we put his one on the back of our car.

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Old 02-12-2011, 07:47 AM   #32
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I'm going to wear a top hat in honour of Abraham Lincoln's birthday.
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Old 02-12-2011, 07:56 AM   #33
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I'm gonna chow down on a 10 pound bowl of glass marbles.
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Old 02-12-2011, 08:48 AM   #34
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my son has a hockey practice - i am making him use a wood stick with black tape and some old tube skates.
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Old 02-12-2011, 01:35 PM   #35
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Old 02-12-2011, 04:54 PM   #36
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I celebrated by marking my students midterms on evolutionary biology... Darwin would NOT have been pleased with the results.
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Old 02-12-2011, 04:57 PM   #37
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Quote:
Originally Posted by vanisleflamesfan View Post
I celebrated by marking my students midterms on evolutionary biology... Darwin would NOT have been pleased with the results.
He'd point out that it is simply natural selection at its finest.
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Old 02-12-2011, 05:06 PM   #38
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I'm going to prove to everybody that I can cut off my own head with a chainsaw.
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Old 02-12-2011, 06:35 PM   #39
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Old 02-12-2011, 08:52 PM   #40
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UBC had a cake and beer night to celebrate last night.
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