plan to ban possession of dogs in Calgary within 15 years

[Frank the Tank]

Every time I see my little kitty all curled up sleeping on the couch I think, man, I'd better kill that little before he get me! Cats are evil too! I think its actually a cat-dog conspiracy and we should kill them all! And bears too. And otters.

[GreenTeaFrapp]

Originally Posted by Cowperson

What if nobody was there to hear?

Wow! Urban sprawl in Calgary is worse then I ever imagined!

[CaptainCrunch]

Originally Posted by Frank the Tank

Every time I see my little kitty all curled up sleeping on the couch I think, man, I'd better kill that little before he get me! Cats are evil too! I think its actually a cat-dog conspiracy and we should kill them all! And bears too. And otters.

The one thing thats saved us from annihalation by the cats is evolution. They don't have oppossible thumbs, therefore they can't grip the pillow and smother us, so they satisfy us by sitting on our faces and farting in the middle of the night.

Yes cats are evil.

[JohnnyFlame]

If the OP was kill/ban cats I would be onside totally.

[Drunk Skunk]

Originally Posted by DESS

Let's get a couple things out of the way right out of the gate.

• yes, I'm completely serious about this
• no, I'm not trolling

Okay, this is why I don't like dogs:

1. They are loud. I can hear them barking at night and I can hear them barking in the morning. If I walked outside and shouted randomly on a daily basis, the cops would be all over me. Why do dogs get away with it?
2. They are dangerous - not bear dangerous - but dangerous enough as outlined by the City here. Yes of course your dog isn't, but some are. In fact, there was an incident every day of the year with an agressive dog in Calgary last year. A low-incident year (according to the article), but unacceptable nevertheless. Obviously this only tracks the incidents reported, so it's safe to assume the rates are even higher.
3. Crap. People simply don't pick up after their dogs and it is absolutely disgusting. Kudos to you if you do, but enough don't that it is an obvious problem.
4. Urine. I've never seen any dog owner, no matter how responsible, pick up their dog's urine. If I whipped out my schlong in the middle of a park where children were playing to take a leak, people would freak. Let's put the public nudity aspect of that example aside, people would be disgusted that I was peeing where kids were playing. I find it equally disgusting to know and see dogs do this, but it is somehow socially unacceptable to call out a guy for letting his dog piss whereever. It's outrageous, frankly.
5. They're dirty and they smell bad.

You know, I understand people love their dogs and that's great. And I can also see that it would be unfair to take a dog out of somebody's home - both to the dog and to the owner.

A more realistic solution to this pest problem we have would be a city-funded initiative to spay and neuter every dog in the city, ban the sale/possession of any new dogs, and just wait for the current generation of dogs to pass away. Within say 15 years the problem would be solved.

I would be curious to know if anyone else would be interested in this plan. Perhaps we could start a petition or do something to get the ball rolling on this. Obviously it will be a tough thing to achieve, but I think if we are compassionate to the current dog owners, make exceptions for work dogs, etc. this may have legs. It will certainly get support from some people, I'm just not sure how many at this point.

[Cowperson]

Originally Posted by DESS

Let's get a couple things out of the way right out of the gate.

• yes, I'm completely serious about this
• no, I'm not trolling

Okay, this is why I don't like dogs:

1. They are loud. I can hear them barking at night and I can hear them barking in the morning. If I walked outside and shouted randomly on a daily basis, the cops would be all over me. Why do dogs get away with it?
2. They are dangerous - not bear dangerous - but dangerous enough as outlined by the City here. Yes of course your dog isn't, but some are. In fact, there was an incident every day of the year with an agressive dog in Calgary last year. A low-incident year (according to the article), but unacceptable nevertheless. Obviously this only tracks the incidents reported, so it's safe to assume the rates are even higher.
3. Crap. People simply don't pick up after their dogs and it is absolutely disgusting. Kudos to you if you do, but enough don't that it is an obvious problem.
4. Urine. I've never seen any dog owner, no matter how responsible, pick up their dog's urine. If I whipped out my schlong in the middle of a park where children were playing to take a leak, people would freak. Let's put the public nudity aspect of that example aside, people would be disgusted that I was peeing where kids were playing. I find it equally disgusting to know and see dogs do this, but it is somehow socially unacceptable to call out a guy for letting his dog piss whereever. It's outrageous, frankly.
5. They're dirty and they smell bad.

A rebuttal from a dog posted on a pet board yesterday:

HERE IN THIS HOUSE
Author unknown

Here in this house...I will never know the loneliness I hear in the barks of the other dogs "out there" I can sleep soundly, assured that when I wake my world will not have changed.I will never know hunger, or the fear of not knowing if I'll eat.

I will not shiver in the cold or grow weary from the heat. I will feel the sun's heat and the rain's coolness and be allowed to smell all that can reach my nose. My fur will shine and never be dirty or matted.

Here in this house...There will be an effort to communicate with me on my level. I will be talked to and, even if I don't understand, I can enjoy the warmth of the words. I will be given a name so that I may know who I am among many. My name will be used in joy and I will love the sound of it!

Here in this house...I will never be a substitute for anything I am not. I will never be used to improve people's images of themselves. I will be loved because I am who I am, not someone's idea of who I should be. I will never suffer for someone's anger, impatience or stupidity. I will be taught all the things I need to know to be loved by all. If I do not learn my lessons well, they will look to my teacher for blame.

Here in this house...I can trust arms that hold, hands that touch. knowing that, no matter what they do, they do it for the good of me. If I am ill, I will be doctored. If scared, I will be calmed. If sad, I will be cheered.No matter what I look like, I will be considered beautiful and known to be of value. I will never be cast out because I am too old, too ill, too unruly, or not cute enough. My life is a responsibility, not an afterthought. I will learn that humans can almost, sometimes, be as kind and as fair as dogs.

Here in this house, I will belong. I will be home.

~Author unknown~

Cowperson

[KTown]

Definately one of the threads of the year!

I couldn't stop laughing.

I am just glad I got a dog to keep people like Dess away from my house.

I was thinking we should ban airplanes because I can't stand there noise.

Actually why don't we load all the dogs into all the airplanes we have and crash them into an island somewhere.

The dogs that survive the crash will come back to be worker dogs, because those dogs are ones we should keep.

Your 15 year problem is now a 1.5hour problem even better than the 15 hour time.

[Regulator75]

DESS, you sir are a tool.

Morley wanted me to pass this message on to you, as his typing skills aren't quite up to par.

• I don't bark at night, in fact I hardly bark at all.

• I don't smell.

• I am not dangerous, unless rolling on my back for belly rubs is a threat.

• I urinate on bushes and tress, not where children play.

• My owner picks up after me, every time.

[Iowa_Flames_Fan]

Beautiful dog, Regulator.

[Frank the Tank]

Originally Posted by Regulator75

DESS, you sir are a tool.

Morley wanted me to pass this message on to you, as his typing skills aren't quite up to par.

• I don't bark at night, in fact I hardly bark at all.

• I don't smell.

• I am not dangerous, unless rolling on my back for belly rubs is a threat.

• I urinate on bushes and tress, not where children play.

• My owner picks up after me, every time.

OMG your dog is cute. I want to hug him. In a non-pansification type of way.

[John Doe]

Originally Posted by DESS

Good point, those signs work great.

Of course they don't work. Dogs can't read!

[HOOT]

Originally Posted by Regulator75

• I am not dangerous, unless rolling on my back for belly rubs is a threat.

OMG that's scary, you don't let your dog near children do you?

Beautiful dog.

[photon]

Awesome!

Originally Posted by Drunk Skunk

[longsuffering]

Originally Posted by Regulator75

DESS, you sir are a tool.

Morley wanted me to pass this message on to you, as his typing skills aren't quite up to par.

• I don't bark at night, in fact I hardly bark at all.

• I don't smell.

• I am not dangerous, unless rolling on my back for belly rubs is a threat.

• I urinate on bushes and tress, not where children play.

• My owner picks up after me, every time.

Orson says: +1

[habernac]

Orson is a truly awesome name for a dog.

[burn_this_city]

^^ i love the tongue hanging out..

[JohnnyFlame]

Originally Posted by KTown

Definately one of the threads of the year!

I couldn't stop laughing.

I am just glad I got a dog to keep people like Dess away from my house.

I was thinking we should ban airplanes because I can't stand there noise.

Actually why don't we load all the dogs into all the airplanes we have and crash them into an island somewhere.

The dogs that survive the crash will come back to be worker dogs, because those dogs are ones we should keep.

Your 15 year problem is now a 1.5hour problem even better than the 15 hour time.

I like it as the sequel once the original series is done. Lost--Canine Adventures as a working title. They could of course speak while on the island. Go back and tell of the horror stories of their interaction with their owners. No puppies would be able to be born. Maybe the "others" could be coyotes just to add a twist. "Ben" could be a rat who wanted to run with the dogs. John could be Lockjaw the bulldog. Sayid would be a pit bull. Jack and Sawyer would be always running around sniffing Kate's butt.

The possibilities are endless!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Teh_Bandwagoner]

Originally Posted by John Doe

Of course they don't work. Dogs can't read!

[kobafett]

My dogs are very dangerous ... probably close to bear dangerous. Also they are loud and their poop is small so you won't see it until it's too late. Pound for pound they are probably the worst dogs in the city.

I'm afraid that my dogs will be the first to be banned.

[octothorp]

Percy questions how anyone could possibly not love him...