#@&!#ing Magpies!

[stang]

Effing hate those s.

Bird crap all over our vehicles as they sit around and wait for our dog to turn his back so they can steal his food. Not to mention waking everyone up at 5 am.

We have now put our dogfood out the back door, and our .22 has taken permanent residence close by. We used to use an air powered BB gun but I dont want to take any chances that I hit it and the bugger doesnt die!

[Antithesis]

Why don't we just exterminate all magpies?

[dissentowner]

Animal rights means recognizing that there is no moral basis, none, for deciding that you have basic rights and that all other animals on the face of the earth, from oysters to chimps, don't. Every creature needs is the right to stay alive, to breathe, to escape unnecessary pain, to shelter, to be free to move about, and to love. As time goes by man has learned from his mistakes. Once rights only belonged to the white man. Everyone else had to fight for theirs or someone else had to fight for them! Institutionalized children used to be used for experiments. So were POW's, gypsies, the elderly, and gay people. Women were thought to be so stupid that allowing them to vote was akin to allowing asses to vote. African American people were thought to be subhuman. People think we can eat and wear and experiment on animals because they think human beings are superior. If I am superior to you does that mean I can kill you for sport or make you dance for me? Were we not taught that might does not always make right? I can make the case that I am superior to a person in a coma or a mentally ######ed person but that does not mean I can skin them and wear them as a fashion accessory or test drain cleaner on them, does it?
Yes, I know, animals are dumb, they can't speak. Does that mean that any dumb individual or group or non communicative being isfair for exploitation?? Should we start making leather furniture out of the hard of hearing or those who can't perform in a spelling bee? If not then that logic fails. It's the same argument the Nazis used to perform hideous on non-Aryan children. They thought Jews were inferior and therefore they could, with complete impunity,cause the Jews pain and suffering and deprive them of life.

[Hack&Lube]

Magpies can invade my yard anytime. They are free to try to wake me up in the morning (they'll fail, nothing can wake me up in the morning). They are free to eat my food or crap outside wherever they wish. The car is in the garage, everything else outside will get washed by weather anyway.

In fact, I wish I had a few more. All I have is two families of robins living in my front yard tree and my backyard tree.

But as long as we are talking about animals we hate - most breeds of dogs I can't stand but I love big Husky looking dogs. They are gorgeous and smart. I hate the dogs my cousins all keep. Little chows or idiot attention starved drool all over you useless dogs who will give their loyalty to anyone with no snouts and don't even have a bark in them.

[troutman]

http://icwdm.org/handbook/birds/Magpies.asp

[Methanolic]

Flying Skunk-Rat (magpie) Update:

As mentioned in my last post here, I was able to scare the scummy air weasels twice with the BB Gun and I also got one really good with the hose when he was in the process of dive bombing me, I had a nice pencil thin stream of water on that pig for a good 7 seconds. His mates were not happy with me and for some reason around 5 or 6 crows also buzzed me. I felt like I was in a Hitchcock movie.

Anyway, I let the dog out this morning, took a nice peaceful stroll around my yard and there was no sign of the dirty little vermin.

Obviously I have not concluded that my methods have solved the problem officially, But this morning was a very good sign that maybe, just maybe, I've defeated the little flying pooh bags.

[Bagor]

Uh-oh. They'll be back.

Probably gone to hold council. That the crows have joined up with the magpies suggests that you have pissed off the entire Corvid family.

Be afraid.

[troutman]

Newcastle United are nick-named the Magpies, and they got relegated this year. These birds are a curse.

[Methanolic]

Originally Posted by Bagor

Uh-oh. They'll be back.

Probably gone to hold council. That the crows have joined up with the magpies suggests that you have pissed off the entire Corvid family.

Be afraid.

That's Hilarious


If that's the case, I'll just get a Bigger Gun!!

[carom]

For most of my life I didn’t have any problems with magpies. A couple years ago one incident changed this:

A couple summers ago my gf and I were walking through scarboro on a quiet Sunday morning on our way to 17th AV to get some breakfast. It was still pretty early (8 ish) so there were not many people about, just the random birds and squirrels. While we were walking along the sidewalk all of a sudden out of nowhere a magpie flew out of a tree and landed on the sidewalk maybe 6 feet in front of us. It seemed to be carrying something. We stopped in our tracks, startled at the audacity of the bird to fly and land so close to us. The bird looked up at us and nodded it head a few times as if to say “look what I can do, aren’t you impressed?” What the bird had been carrying and had laid down on the sidewalk between us was a freshly killed, headless robin. MY gf gasped. The magpie cawed, nodded its head a few more times and picked up the headless robin and flew away. My gf and I looked at each other asking if what we had just saw really happened. Needless to say we did not have an appetite for breakfast anymore.

[Suzles]

^^ Corvids are mostly carrion eaters - so clean up a lot of dead animals - they are not known for their killing ability as they don't have sharp claws or hooked beaks as birds of prey have. This bird was probably dead already when he found it and he was taking it to feed his family. He was doing a good job so had every reason to be proud. (They will take eggs as well).

[Bagor]

Originally Posted by Suzles

^^ Corvids are mostly carrion eaters - so clean up a lot of dead animals - they are not known for their killing ability as they don't have sharp claws or hooked beaks as birds of prey have.

Suzles ... agreed that they're not direct killers. They are however very clever indirect killers.

It's not uncommon (I've observed personally on numerous occasions) to see Eurasian magpies poke and prod at baby rabbits on grass verges forcing them onto roads and oncoming traffic.

Also, hooded crows are a farmers biggest nightmare during lambing season. They go for the eyes.

Personally, I love the crow family. Smartest birds out there.

[fatso]

I don't like birds and I especially despite crows and magpies. Was attacked by some crows a few years back and it confirmed why I hate them. So, I am admittedly biased as to whether or not we ought to respect them and share our space with them.

I am somewhat sympathetic to the argument of animal activists like Dissentower. It does seem like we're all here and they ought to have a right to life. However, I see two problems with it.

First I'm admitedly more on the side of the fence that sees humans as superior beings (I said it!) and as such our behaviour does not need to be congruent or in keeping with other animals. So, I have no problem with pest removal or extermination. Conversely, though, I think we have a duty to protect endangered species. It seems to me that the logical conclusion of the argument that the OP shares his space with the magpies and ought not disturb them is really a laissez-faire one... just leave all the animals alone and let them fend for themselves... que sera sera. I don't think anyone would really be a big fan of that when you consider the human pollution in the ocean, for example. I'm not arguing that the magpies cannot be dealt with at all, but rather that it's too simplistic just to say that they all animals have a right to be there and that no interference with their behaviour - however bad it may be - is justified.

Second, let's be straight-up with this. The magpies are terrorizing the OP's dog and children. If we're going to say that the magpies have a right to their behaviour, then we should to ours, particularly since both species in this exchange are ostensibly exhibiting protective behaviour. I'm not saying an uzi is in order to deal with them. But certainly the magpies and crows will use the totality of their intelligence to deal with other animals, including less intelligent ones. Why should we be any different? Why should people not be allowed protection from attacks by another species. To not allow the OP to protect himself and family through natural means is a policy of deference to the magpies rather than co-existence. That strikes me as wrong and misguided.

[4X4]

I don't see anything wrong with killing a bird that attacks humans or is a major pest. I won't sugarcoat that at all. If it were me in the OP's shoes, I'd be sitting in a rocking chair with my pellet gun.

I remember when I was a kid, my buddy had a paper route (well, we both did) and on his route there was a point where this crow would swoop down and claw his head. It just started one day out of the blue. He was doing his route and this crow attacked him. He shat himself, but finished the route and went and told his parents.
They didn't really know what to do, and since there was no real injury, they just kinda shrugged and had an attitude of "well that's strange. Huh". Until it happened the next morning as well. And the next morning.
A few days of that and he was outright terrified. So his dad did what any dad should do. Went with him the next day and brought a pellet gun and killed the f'r.

[Hack&Lube]

Originally Posted by Bagor

Suzles ... agreed that they're not direct killers. They are however very clever indirect killers.

It's not uncommon (I've observed personally on numerous occasions) to see Eurasian magpies poke and prod at baby rabbits on grass verges forcing them onto roads and oncoming traffic.

Also, hooded crows are a farmers biggest nightmare during lambing season. They go for the eyes.

Personally, I love the crow family. Smartest birds out there.

The distinction has to be made that Eurasian magpies while looking almost identical to their North American counterparts - are really not closely related at all. They've been separated by millions of years of evolution...just they are like Alligators. They've been successful at what they do so they haven't changed much.

But man, okay baby bunnies and baby robins are cute and all...but if there's a creature smart enough to get other animals to kill themselves so they can feed themselves or their family - you gotta have respect for them. It's just the Buffalo Run bird style. You cannot impose any kind of morality on the animal world, I just have a profound respect and interest in animal intelligence.

[Kybosh]

Originally Posted by Suzles

^^ Corvids are mostly carrion eaters - so clean up a lot of dead animals - they are not known for their killing ability as they don't have sharp claws or hooked beaks as birds of prey have. This bird was probably dead already when he found it and he was taking it to feed his family. He was doing a good job so had every reason to be proud. (They will take eggs as well).

I almost agree but I have seen many a magpie directly attack and kill robins in the prairies in order to secure a nest. If you look inside a magpie mud clump nest, you'll normally find a robins (or other bird) nest that they took over. The farming blood in me lends an intense hatred towards magpies when they damage and destroy livelihoods.

[dissentowner]

Originally Posted by Methanolic

Flying Skunk-Rat (magpie) Update:

As mentioned in my last post here, I was able to scare the scummy air weasels twice with the BB Gun and I also got one really good with the hose when he was in the process of dive bombing me, I had a nice pencil thin stream of water on that pig for a good 7 seconds. His mates were not happy with me and for some reason around 5 or 6 crows also buzzed me. I felt like I was in a Hitchcock movie.

Anyway, I let the dog out this morning, took a nice peaceful stroll around my yard and there was no sign of the dirty little vermin.

Obviously I have not concluded that my methods have solved the problem officially, But this morning was a very good sign that maybe, just maybe, I've defeated the little flying pooh bags.

I am happy to hear no magpies were killed, I also hope they leave you in peace and your tactics worked. Another thing you can do is put a fake owl in your yard, pretty much every bird and rodent will avoid your yard then.

[Wookie]

Originally Posted by dissentowner

I am happy to hear no magpies were killed, I also hope they leave you in peace and your tactics worked. Another thing you can do is put a fake owl in your yard, pretty much every bird and rodent will avoid your yard then.

If the magpie could figure out a way to kill and eat you it would.

[BOSSY]

Originally Posted by dissentowner

I am happy to hear no magpies were killed, I also hope they leave you in peace and your tactics worked. Another thing you can do is put a fake owl in your yard, pretty much every bird and rodent will avoid your yard then.

They figure out pretty quick that it's fake - they are "highly intelligent" afterall...

I say kill them... Kill them all! - insert sadistic laugh here...

[Methanolic]

I learned from the Internets that, Yes! They are very intelligent. Fake owls, scarecrows, pinwheels, hanging old CD's in trees ...None of which work. The Pagmies figure out very quickly that these things do not pose a threat, Then they continue with their noise pollution and pooping all over your stuff.