So I've Decided To Kill My Brother...

[theJuice]

Lol, good stuff

[Superflyer]

All of a sudden I am a little scared to be in here.

[FireFly]

You need to wrap yourself in saran wrap or you'll leave DNA and or fingerprints behind. Also, get new shoes because they can trace you by your shoeprint, but if the shoes are new, they won't have the wear pattern that will be evident on all the rest of your shoes. You'll also need to burn the new shoes when you're done with them.

[HalifaxDrunk]

Originally Posted by 4X4

Probably the best way is to go "hiking" in the mountains. A good push at the right time, and your troubles are over.
You've got to be able to play the part, though. Gotta act sad and distraught.

"We were walking and he just slipped!!" "Why couldn't it have been ME!"

Well the Rocky mountains may be a bit far for Maritime Q-Scout to travel. However as you are in Halifax and from Sydney take him to the Cape Breton Highlands and use the above plan.

Or you could kill him by making him continuously watch Oiler vs Canuck games over a week long period, then dispose of the body in the Sydney Tar Ponds.

[ken0042]

Originally Posted by HalifaxDrunk

Or you could kill him by making him continuously watch Oiler vs Canuck games over a week long period,

By forcing him to not change the channel, you would have to be in the same room. And now we're talking about murder-suicide.

[Reaper]

Originally Posted by ken0042

By forcing him to not change the channel, you would have to be in the same room. And now we're talking about murder-suicide.

Only if he doesn't come prepapred and runs out of duct tape.

[Maritime Q-Scout]

I'm currently at the parent's house, hence the urge the kill the wee one. So the Highlands, and Tar Ponds are options. Standing next to the gaurd rail on Smokey,

Me: "Hey do you know what's on the other side of that gaurd rail?"
Bro: "No, what?"
Me: "Nothing but a 1,000 foot straight drop to the ocean... *push* woops!"



As for the Canucks/Oilers watching, he doesn't like hockey, and actually wears around one of the Bud Lite Edmonton ballcaps just to **** me off.

I'm also scouting places on the Mira River, and Seal Island to dispose of some "extra cement blocks I mysterously have but don't need"


(on a side note, this thread's actually quite funny, so some good CAN come out of my brother's annoyance)

[Blaster86]

Fast paced high-scoring hockey kills Flames fans =-o.

[RedMan12]

Originally Posted by Blaster86

Fast paced high-scoring hockey kills Flames fans =-o.

Sieve goalies and defensemen that think they are forwards kill Canuck fans. Not making the playoffs, too. I think I saw a couple Bertuzzi and Naslund jersey's jump off the Lions Gate bridge in April.

[sadora]

Originally Posted by Maritime Q-Scout

any suggestions on what I should do with a dead body?

anyone have a van I can borrow?

how do I clean up that last little trace of blood on his bedroom floor?

and anyone want to buy some of his stuff? There's a few cool electronics, PS2, Xbox, Xbox360 (not many games though)


Any help is appreciated



(PS: For the leaglites out there I'm not *really* going to kill my brother, just giving it some thought *if* I was to do so... he litterally just left the room and announced "I have to **** like donkey kong")

Alright, first off, and I know this will get messy and for this reason you must line your floor with plastic bags. Then what you want to do is get a nice big and sharp clever knife so that you can cut of the limbs...it's a lot easier to dispose of the body once the limbs are removed. then what you want to do is get rid of anything that might help the cops identify him, ie. hair and teeth...fingers are a good idea too. Then, take a trip down to your nearest ocean or big lake, rent a boat, tie a rock or something very heavy to the body and dispose of the bag. Simple enough...For more information just watch any good ol' gangster flick...Goodfellas is a good start.

[Lombogirl]

It's a little scary all the great ideas people have had to kill people on this thread.... it's almost like you guys are professionals.....

Dude, however you do it, get rid of your weapon of choice and make sure you have a solid alibi. Then you'll be golden!

[yyc]

cutting bodies up is for an impulse killing. if your gonna plan it out you dont need to get that messy. strangle him to death, puncture his stomach and lungs with a knife, put him in a sleeping bag, tie the sleeping bag up with heavy chains and drop him in any realitvly large body of water.the sleeping bag and chains will keep the body in one peice till it decays and the holes in his gut and lungs will make him less bouyant just incase some thing goes wrong, he wont float back up. sheesh people its like you never had to get rid of an ex gir..... ive said too much. {i kid i kid}

edit. just incase you were wondering, this was the method the hells angels used to get rid of bodies during the montreal biker war. lots of sleeping bags in the st lawrence apperantly

[HalifaxDrunk]

Originally Posted by Lombogirl

Dude, however you do it, get rid of your weapon of choice and make sure you have a solid alibi. Then you'll be golden!

Ok, here is your alibi. Give someone your CP password, then inform them when you are doing the deed. Have them post at the same time from a desktop computer that can be traced to a house address (not a mobile laptop).

No detective or jury will believe you would give out your password to Calgary Puck! The only problem is you may have to then kill the person who now knows your password....hmm it's a vicious cycle...

[jolinar of malkshor]

Why dont you take him hiking, just the two of ya, and push him off the mountain. Opps he fell, it was an accident.

[MoneyGuy]

Originally Posted by Reaper

First of all, pay cash for any "supplies" you may need for the act and do not keep any receipts.

Here's a list:
1) Wood Chipper
2) 30 5 gallon buckets with lids
3) 30 bags ready mix concrete
3) Plastic bags for "tool" disposal
4) Metal smelter for disposing of wood chipper afterwards.
5) Map illustrating all deep water bodies across the country
6) Gasoline for incinerating wood chipper output
7) Cement mixer

I could tell you more but it could get dicey with this being a public forum and all.

I think you're already an accessory.

[MoneyGuy]

Originally Posted by Lombogirl

It's a little scary all the great ideas people have had to kill people on this thread.... it's almost like you guys are professionals.....

Dude, however you do it, get rid of your weapon of choice and make sure you have a solid alibi. Then you'll be golden!

Don't you guys even watch CSI. Those dudes are good. They'll figure it out in about 43 minutes plus commercials.

[The Fonz]

Stab him with an icycle *sp*....

The evidence will melt.

[Looger]

plane rental.

ocean.

[Flames_Gimp]

What ever happened to the 'ole acid bath? Nothing like a fresh batch of porridge!

[Clarkey]

What the hell? I read this whole thing and I don't get it.