Manners/Social Conventions You Don't Follow

[Huntingwhale]

Originally Posted by burn_this_city

Cheap tippers are simply cheapskates, they are deplorable specimens that are so obsessed with saving pennies that they typically trip over the dollars in life. We had a buddy who would always rush to pay at the pub before everyone, it was evident after a while what he was doing. Magically he wasn't our friend anymore. Anyone who looks down at waitstaff, delivery drivers, baristas ect and justifies stiffing them out of a couple bucks is a loser.

I agree with everything your said. I'm the biggest tipper you'll meet. But where is all the hate for companies who pay their staff minimum wage and make it so workers have to ''survive on tips''. It shouldn't be like that in the first place.

I can totally understand why some people choose not to. I'm not one of those people, but I do it because I'm guilt tripped into doing it and as someone who has worked in the service industry before, it makes my day when someone tips nicely. But it sure as hell shouldn't have to be like that. I love going over to Europe and not having to tip. It's a bloody greedy NA thing that employers have made it so honest hard workers should have to ''survive on tips''. It GMG that it's been engrained in our society that we should have to tip not because we received stellar service, but because the workers won't be able to pay bills if we don't.

[burn_this_city]

Originally Posted by Huntingwhale

I agree with everything your said. I'm the biggest tipper you'll meet. But where is all the hate for companies who pay their staff minimum wage and make it so workers have to ''survive on tips''. It shouldn't be like that in the first place.

I can totally understand why some people choose not to. I'm not one of those people, but I do it because I'm guilt tripped into doing it and as someone who has worked in the service industry before, it makes my day when someone tips nicely. But it sure as hell shouldn't have to be like that. I love going over to Europe and not having to tip. It's a bloody greedy NA thing that employers have made it so honest hard workers should have to ''survive on tips''.

Europe has terrible pricing at restaurants and poor service. I'd rather tip the waitress instead of paying $6 for a coke and wondering aloud if the money is actually trickling down to the waitstaff.

[Flames89]

Originally Posted by CliffFletcher

The shoes thing is very much regional. I'd wager houses in the areas of North America and Western Europe where it's not conventional to take of your shoes aren't any dirtier than houses in areas where you do. Then there's the sweaty stocking feet issue. We think it's perfectly normal, but in other parts of the world it's considered disgusting to let someone's stocking feet touch your floor. And of course, some people wear shoes and sandals without socks. You'd really prefer someone walking around your house in bare feet?

Here's an article in the UK expressing anxiety about the growing trend there for removing shoes, which many regard as a rude imposition on guests: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/ar...sary-naff.html

And another article for expats trying to understand the social norms around shoes and how they vary by country: http://expatsincebirth.com/2013/11/2...-shoes-please/

And an article in the U.S. where removing shoes at the door is described as a practice started in Hawaii that is making its way into the mainland: http://www.staradvertiser.com/news/2...ks_others.html

If you are having a full party, you can't expect guests to take off their shoes, though I generally expect it and most friends abide - as streets are dirty.

The exceptions are hot women and old people. Have my wood floors taken some dings from high heeled shoes? Yes, but they have always been a little dinged up and I see it as adding character.

[EldrickOnIce]

So where do you draw the line?
Tip a 'barista' but not the counter person at McDonald's?
Tip on pizza delivery, but not on pickup?
Tip the clerk at Walmart? Tack 18% onto my grocery bill for the person ringing it through and packing it?
There's always a line. Each person's line is different. So be it.

[MrMastodonFarm]

Originally Posted by Flames89

If you are having a full party, you can't expect guests to take off their shoes,

That's why we've seen an explosion in garage parties recently.

[CroFlames]

I hate tipping. I think its a silly North American practice, but I still do it because you have too.

The other day I had terrible service at a restaurant. I was adamant that I wasn't going to tip. But I've never not tipped, so I tipped. Ugh I was disappointed in myself.

[polak]

Originally Posted by Flames89

If you are having a full party, you can't expect guests to take off their shoes, though I generally expect it and most friends abide - as streets are dirty.

Every party I've been to besides one was shoes off.

The only one that wasn't was a massive rager at buddy's house that was being gutted.

[corporatejay]

My house isn't a barn. Take your goddamn shoes off.

[Coach]

I would especially like shoes off if it's a party. One person who was just walking on the dry sidewalk and is only around for a few minutes? Fine. A whole host of people dancing and twisting their shoes into my carpet/on the hardwood? No thanks, especially with Calgary weather.

My dad is anal about shoes in his house and then comes over to mine in his shoes. I always give him crap about it (in a "you're in my house now, bud" kind of way). Anyone I know automatically takes their shoes off in anyone's house.

[CliffFletcher]

Originally Posted by Sliver

I know other parts of the world don't take their shoes off in the house. In other parts of the world they also wipe their ass with their bare hand. We're a particularly clean people, here.

Pretty sure people in the UK, France, Netherlands, Australia, and the greater part of the U.S. where shoes are worn indoors don't wipe their ass with their bare hand. Okay, I'm not so sure about France.

The point I'm making is that to people in those countries it isn't a matter of being clean vs dirty. They honestly regard the amount of dirt you bring into a house on your shoes as negligible, whereas we've developed a peculiar cultural horror of it (again, I think it goes back to a time when Canadians had slush and horse crap on their boots all the time). To them, our shoe removal custom is like a host handing his guests laytex gloves whenever they enter his house and asking them to put them on. It comes across as neurotic and rude.

[EldrickOnIce]

Originally Posted by polak

Every party I've been to besides one was shoes off.

The only one that wasn't was a massive rager at buddy's house that was being gutted.

We have disposable slippers available. Can buy them for a buck a pair online. Take off your shoes and wear something else or don't - we are doing floors after the party anyway. Or you can leave.

[Weitz]

Originally Posted by CroFlames

I hate tipping. I think its a silly North American practice, but I still do it because you have too.

The other day I had terrible service at a restaurant. I was adamant that I wasn't going to tip. But I've never not tipped, so I tipped. Ugh I was disappointed in myself.

Was at National on 8th, on the roof top patio. After waiting an hour for the beers we ordered we went to the waitress and said to cancel them and for the bill.

None of the 8 people in our group tipped. We felt okay about it because it was absolutely ridiculous and the way management acted. Usually I will tip even with poor service.

[ernie]

Originally Posted by burn_this_city

Europe has terrible pricing at restaurants and poor service. I'd rather tip the waitress instead of paying $6 for a coke and wondering aloud if the money is actually trickling down to the waitstaff.

I don't find Europe to have bad service. They typically have different service. Unlike North America where the server will actively come to the table every few minutes to see if everything is all right, in Europe they wait for you to wave them over or ask them for something. It's not bad service it's a different culture. Think of it as the following...you are out for a romantic dinner. In Europe the server is going to leave you alone so you can have a long conversation, hold hands etc without being disturbed until you want to be disturbed. In North America your conversation will be stalled/stopped several times to deal with the waitress. I personally enjoy the European dining service much more. I enjoy watching people get visibly uncomfortable when the bill doesn't come to the table immediately after the dishes are cleared.

On the other hand you have hotels where I think the staff in Europe (and Asia) are far more attentive than what you get in North America.

btw....typically waitresses in Europe don't need your tip and often it is not expected. They are paid a far higher wage than in North America and not dependent on tips.

[ernie]

Originally Posted by corporatejay

My house isn't a barn. Take your goddamn shoes off.

Yes. Very annoying living down here and having to remind every single person that comes to our house to please take their shoes off. Even more annoying is getting our kids to do so because they never have to anywhere else.

[Coach]

Originally Posted by CliffFletcher

Pretty sure people in the UK, France, Netherlands, Australia, and the greater part of the U.S. where shoes are worn indoors don't wipe their ass with their bare hand. Okay, I'm not so sure about France.

The point I'm making is that to people in those countries it isn't a matter of being clean vs dirty. They honestly regard the amount of dirt you bring into a house on your shoes as negligible, whereas we've developed a peculiar cultural horror of it (again, I think it goes back to a time when Canadians had slush and horse crap on their boots all the time). To them, our shoe removal custom is like a host handing his guests laytex gloves whenever they enter his house and asking them to put them on. It comes across as neurotic and rude.

And what if your shoes are muddy and/or dirty enough that they would leave noticeable marks on a floor/carpet (which someone likely just cleaned in the anticipation of guests)? Someone who won't take shoes off, and abide by the wishes of someone allowing you into their home, seems pretty neurotic and rude.

Most people in the places you mention have indoor slippers they carry around, or people have guest slippers in the homes. This is actually where Uggs come from. Aussies think we are ridiculous for wearing them outside.

As for your point about the gloves, people don't wash their shoes multiple times per day as they (hopefully) do their hands.

[CliffFletcher]

Originally Posted by ernie

Yes. Very annoying living down here and having to remind every single person that comes to our house to please take their shoes off. Even more annoying is getting our kids to do so because they never have to anywhere else.

Where's "down here?"

[Cappy]

Originally Posted by Trailer Fire

So why the imaginary line? You'll tip someone who will do nothing but bring your food to a table in a place you drive to, but won't tip someone who brings your food to your table in your house? Why? Because they bring you a drink? Why not bar staff? They bring you drinks. Batistas take the time to concoct fairly complicated drinks, tailored to your taste. Batistas also serve you food.

Wait staff simply bring you food at an establishment you go to. Everyone else does more.

Honestly, the line is basic social convention. For as long as most can remember you tip servers. That is the way it is; whereas, many of the other things mentioned have been relatively new areas of tipping (while some may disagree with the no-tipping list, above, i'm sure we all tip different jobs different amounts).

In all seriousness, tipping anyone for doing their job is rather perplexing, not to mention the jobs that are commonly tipped as opposed to those that are not are rather arbitrary as well.

[CaptainYooh]

I've had a feeling some people here are sick pigs. This thread has confirmed it. So far, we have no-flushers, bathroom-door-lockers, no-tippers, shower-pissers and frequent under-the-table-mastrubators. Take notice NDP, this is your voter profile.

[CliffFletcher]

Originally Posted by MattyC

And what if your shoes are muddy and/or dirty enough that they would leave noticeable marks on a floor/carpet (which someone likely just cleaned in the anticipation of guests)?

That's what door mats are for - wiping. And if they're really bad - like dog crap deeply embedded in the treads - I suppose it's perfectly okay to say "I stepped in dog crap, so I'm taking my shoes off." At least that shows discretion, rather than the default "all shoes are always filthy." I swear some people are so neurotic about shoes that if you took a brand new pair of $300 dress shoes out of a box they wouldn't let you put them on your feet anywhere but in the front foyer. Cultural taboos are weird.

[LChoy]

Originally Posted by burn_this_city

Europe has terrible pricing at restaurants and poor service. I'd rather tip the waitress instead of paying $6 for a coke and wondering aloud if the money is actually trickling down to the waitstaff.

Sorry to chime in on this, but I had the great fortune to live in, or spend a significant amount of time in Europe, Asia, United States, Australia, and New Zealand. I have experienced both great and terrible restaurant service as well seen the same variation in restaurant pricing in other countries as I do here. In my opinion, there is no correlation between tip culture and service, rather it's the restaurant and their servers that will ultimately affect whether you have a good or terrible dining experience. To paint all restaurants in Europe as being more expensive and having poorer service is a fallacy

Lchoy