Depression

[puckluck2]

It's not very often people openly talk about depression but I was just curious to know if anyone here is willing to admit they have dealt with depression and if so, what measures were taken to help you deal with it. For anyone who's taken antidepressants, how have they changed your life?

I've never been to a doctor about depression but I'm really considering it lately. For the past couple years I just feel different. I'm kind of ashamed to admit I'm feeling this way. I'm rarely ever happy even though I got a lovely girlfriend, great friends and a great family. I feel like I should be happier, but it won't just happen for me. I've never told anyone I am dealing with depression because it just feels embarrassing to me. I feel trapped like I have a disease that no one knows about and just am too scared to come clean.

Anyone have any stories to share? Not looking for sympathy, just to hear stories of people who dealt with similar situations.

[MrMastodonFarm]

Pretty long thread about this before IIRC, and a lot of good open and positive advice.

[nik-]

I don't think I've ever been depressed, but it seems like identifying that you might have an issue is a good first step. I don't think depression is anything to be ashamed of as it's not always something you can control.

[puckluck2]

Originally Posted by MrMastodonFarm

Pretty long thread about this before IIRC, and a lot of good open and positive advice.

Just searched and found this thread http://forum.calgarypuck.com/showthr...ght=depression

Will give it a read, thanks.

[Coys1882]

It's tough to grasp I know but not talking about your depression with the people you love is like not telling them you have cancer or heart disease. Getting the support and encouragement to seek the help you need is just as important as getting the help. It might help validate your importance and motivate you to make sure you get yourself back on track.

Depression is a nasty nasty thing if left to fester - it tore my mother to shreds before she finally got it under control. Now she's more like the person I remember growing up instead of always being moody, tired or pessimistic.

Get help dude - stigma be damned, the only people who need to know are the ones who care about you and they won't be bothered by it, they'll just want you to be well.

[puckluck2]

Originally Posted by nik-

I don't think I've ever been depressed, but it seems like identifying that you might have an issue is a good first step. I don't think depression is anything to be ashamed of as it's not always something you can control.

For me personally I think it's been the easiest step. I know for a fact I am dealing with it. I'm not in denial about it and never have been, but I just can't seem to admit to anyone else that I am.

I'm kind of like the comedian who makes jokes to hide his true feelings. My friends and family all think I'm a happy guy because when they see me I mask my unhappiness by making jokes and being the funny guy. I'm kind of 2 faced because the way I act and the way I feel are totally opposite.

[Lego Man]

I know it can be a disorganized place, but there is a section on reddit that is dedicated to depression... here are a few that might be helpful:

http://www.reddit.com/r/depression/
http://www.reddit.com/r/getting_over_it/

Although I don't have anything valueable to share personally, I think it's very important to know as much as possible about depression and more importantly to be able to relate to others who may be going through (or have gone through) something similar. I hate to redirect you away from CP, but if it helps it's worth it!

[Daradon]

Originally Posted by Iginla

It's not very often people openly talk about depression but I was just curious to know if anyone here is willing to admit they have dealt with depression and if so, what measures were taken to help you deal with it. For anyone who's taken antidepressants, how have they changed your life?

I've never been to a doctor about depression but I'm really considering it lately. For the past couple years I just feel different. I'm kind of ashamed to admit I'm feeling this way. I'm rarely ever happy even though I got a lovely girlfriend, great friends and a great family. I feel like I should be happier, but it won't just happen for me. I've never told anyone I am dealing with depression because it just feels embarrassing to me. I feel trapped like I have a disease that no one knows about and just am too scared to come clean.

Anyone have any stories to share? Not looking for sympathy, just to hear stories of people who dealt with similar situations.

I have, and it tied closely with my insomnia. Funny enough I think my insomnia helped create it, not the other way around, which is usually what it is. Anyway. I don't wish to divulge much here, but if you want, feel free to PM me, we can talk.

You are brave and smart to ask for help.

[kermitology]

One of the most important things about depression is recognizing when you can't deal with it on your own anymore. It's usually something that you're able to cope with for long periods of time, but at some point you will hopefully scare yourself, and that is when it's time to talk to someone. In my case that all I really need; just to talk.

So don't fear the talking, it's a good exercise, and it will lead you to a better place one way or another.

[Puppet Guy]

I was diagnosed with depression twelve years ago, and it was actually a relief in a way because lots of things throughout my life made much more sense. I still get bad days, but I control it through meds and exercise (and actually I found exercise to be the better way of treating it). The most important thing to do to fight it is to treat the cause and not the symptoms. Find out exactly what's bringing you down and change it (which is something that most depressives I've talked to don't do). It might not be easy, but it works.

If I can help, feel free to PM me.

[Rathji]

After my dad was diagnosed with Cancer, I was diagnosed with depression. The meds gave me the runs like you wouldn't believe, and were not doing much. so I stopped taking them and just dealt with it.

That not to say that everyone Can or should do the same, but I felt like it was very minor and I could use other tools to deal with it, now that I was aware what was going on. I started focusing on my health and spending time with my dad and it really helped things turn around.

[OldDutch]

Originally Posted by Coys1882

It's tough to grasp I know but not talking about your depression with the people you love is like not telling them you have cancer or heart disease. Getting the support and encouragement to seek the help you need is just as important as getting the help. It might help validate your importance and motivate you to make sure you get yourself back on track.

Depression is a nasty nasty thing if left to fester - it tore my mother to shreds before she finally got it under control. Now she's more like the person I remember growing up instead of always being moody, tired or pessimistic.

Get help dude - stigma be damned, the only people who need to know are the ones who care about you and they won't be bothered by it, they'll just want you to be well.

This is a great post. I haven't ever had depression, but know friends that have. One got help, and is where she wants to be. The other didn't get help, and it got very bad.

Mental illness is hard for people to grasp because it is not tangible. You see someone with a physical injury, and you can grasp why they can't get out of bed in the morning. With mental, people can't see that obvious injury and assume you are a healthy person with no reason to act/feel the way you are.

This is just plain wrong, and a limitation of our society as a whole. We are conditioned around things we can see/feel/taste, it really comes from our primate background. So it is understandable why people have a hard time coming to identify what is going on with them, or their friends.

So the only advice I can give you is screw the stigmas, and get help. Just like a physical illness you have to treat it, or at least try to. Just know that you can get treatment and there is hope.

[Igottago]

Some good suggestions in here, depression needs to be treated differently for different people, so getting the help of a professional is a great step.

But in addition to that, I would recommend reading "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. Some really good information on how people's overthinking can lead to anxiety and depression.

[Prototype]

I was treated for, and realized that it was due to a series of unfortunate events.

My grandfather had just died, a friend had just committed suicide, I was in a dead end job thanks to incompetent management, and my first son was just born (not unfortunate, but the professional help I attended said it was common for fathers to become depressed after child birth).

I made changes. Some of the triggers we unavoidable, but the things I could do something about, I did something about.

I must say, I just started basic exercise for the first time, full time, since high school (13 years ago) and I feel so much better physically and mentally than I have in a long time. All I'm doing is sit ups and push ups while my shower warms up.

But find help, no matter how mild you think you're at. Talk to a doctor, talk to friends, seek professional help if needed. Really, there's nothing negative about it.

Some will not understand. My mother became upset when I told her about what I was going through. But in the end, she understood, and I'm in a much better place.

But talk... doesn't matter to who. Get it out of your system. You're also going to have bad days after all this. I do. But it's much better, and much more manageable.

[puckluck2]

Thanks to everyone for sharing their stories and the support. I appreciate it.

[undercoverbrother]

I have never been diagnosed with depression, but looking back I am sure I suffered. I can back from overseas with the military in ’93 and it all went bad. At that time it was not a good time to be “in”. There was not the same support as is shown now. All news stories of the military were of a negative nature. I came back, started drinking heavily and left the military. I went back to U of C, did nothing, and got kicked out. I saw a psychologist (that was arranged by my old CO LCol Lynn Moffat, a great man). It’s funny she sat down with me and we talked. She could not believe that I was allowed to get out with no counseling. We left a very violent place where we were shot at and mortared daily and got on a plane, and 7 days later I was walking down a city street in Calgary (thankfully that has changed now). It was her that pointed out my troubles. I was lucky and had some good friends and a great girlfriend (now wife) that was very supportive. I was not a good patient and should have seen her much more. But back then I was coming from a military mindset which very much was suck it up and soldier on (again this has changed). I ended up working some really dead end jobs, some days I couldn’t get out of bed. I got very heavily involved in sport (in my case rugby), and met some very good supportive people. I managed to get through it and get my life back on track. I got my degree and now have a good job, two wonderful kids and a great wife. But it still raises its ugly head sometime.

I am not sure if this helps at all, but I reckon you would be surprised if you know how many people battle the same things.

Cheers and all the best. If you need any help please reach out.

[undercoverbrother]

Originally Posted by fotze

Pretty sure Lynn Moffat was my religion teacher at Bishop Carroll. Would that be the same guy?

yep it would.

I have not idea what he was like as a teacher. My my dealings with him were exceptional. I can not say enough good things about that man. He was a great man to work for.

[flamesfever]

I am by no means an expert, however have had a lot of experience dealing with my wife's depressions. Depression is not to be taken lightly and anyone, who suspects they have it, should see their doctor. The two main methods used to fight depression are (1) cognitive behavioral therapy used by psychologists and (2) medications employed by psychiatrists. From what I understand, both methods have proven successful for sufferers. I would recommend reading the book "Feeling Good" by David D. Burns.

I believe one in five or six will suffer from depression during their lifetime, so there aren't too many people who have not been exposed to it, through family members or friends. It's a disease just like anything else, and you shouldn't feel ashamed for having it. I have found that during the past 10 years, much of the stigma has gone from it, through people openly talking about it.

I have found that an unusual amount of stress, coupled with lack of sleep, can sometimes trigger an attack. I believe that getting adequate help for your first depression is very important, as the risk of recurrence increases with the more depressions you have.

[meanmachine13]

Does anyone here suffer from social anxiety or another form of anxiety?

[Hack&Lube]

It is nothing to be ashamed about despite the fact that there is some social stigma from people who just won't ever understand if they haven't experienced it. There are many different forms of depression. Some are treatable with therapy, some are treatable with pharmaceuticals, some are untreatable.

Personally, I've found that the best and long-lasting treatment is dramatic change in your own life and lifestyle.

Depression is an irrational beast, a demon that comes out of nowhere and seems to stay forever. It will happen with no rhyme or reason, even when logically you should have every reason to be happy. Ultimately for me, I tried every route and the only one that worked was dramatic and radical life change because for me, the root cause was lingering unhappiness and dissatisfaction with things like your status quo and routine.

Even though people might tell you that you have it good or reasonably, you think you should be happy, is there something that is holding you back? You have to attack it from every angle from small things from rewarding yourself with good food, good company, to getting a bit of sunshine every day (especially if you have some kind of seasonal-dis affective disorder), to changing everything in your life that you possibly can to add more successes and victories yourself to every day.

That's the only thing that worked for me and I tried almost everything and have a stack of medical literature on it in my closet. For me, it was an overwhelming sense of irrational oppression and helplessness and frustration that triggered years of living in an abyss. Rationally, nothing should be wrong but my subconscious was deeply unhappy. It might be unfeasible for others but I had to quit my job, move, go back to school, change careers, break off almost all of my relationships, lose my religion, find new relationships that were stimulating me, and indulge myself in activities and learning new things all the time (instruments, languages, art, science, sports, etc.) that I felt were enriching my mind to get my brain chemistry working again naturally because I'm too independent and stubborn to listen to any cognitive behavioral therapy and medications all had their opposite intended effect.

The most important thing is to not be embarrassed about it. Be open and bold about it. Find the people you can talk to about this because they are the ones worth keeping around. Identify (the few) moments in your life that you happy or satisfied and try to figure out why you are happy in those times and not in others. Try to add elements of those moments into your every day. For me, self-improvement and the variety that came with it was the thing I needed to do to feel well again.