05-23-2012, 11:30 AM
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#2
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First Line Centre
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Vancouver, BC
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If I am not mistaken, bull semen can cost upwards of $200,000
__________________
"we're going to win game 7," Daniel Sedin told the Vancpuver Sun.
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05-23-2012, 11:30 AM
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#3
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My face is a bum!
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1) It's really going to hurt if you don't get the aim right. I know it's your own crotch, but it's surprisingly hard to get the angle just right.
2) You won't get pregnant with a glorious half bull/half man creature. It's a really painful disappointing process.
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05-23-2012, 11:31 AM
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#4
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Lifetime Suspension
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you thirsty?
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05-23-2012, 11:32 AM
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#5
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In Your MCP
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Watching Hot Dog Hans
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http://www.altabeef.com/
My old man takes his bulls there to be "milked"
I really don't want to know what you're doing, but I sort of really do.
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05-23-2012, 11:34 AM
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#6
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Lifetime Suspension
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: The Void between Darkness and Light
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This is quite obviously retaliation for the scheme Phanuthier was developing when he needed hundreds of microwaves.
Spy vs. Spy.
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05-23-2012, 11:34 AM
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#7
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Lifetime Suspension
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Well let's all guess?
Jacka$$ style of paintball match?
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05-23-2012, 11:36 AM
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#8
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Lifetime Suspension
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I am sure you could just run a donation campaign from the website, and get the genuine article.
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05-23-2012, 11:45 AM
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#9
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evil of fart
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drewboy12
If I am not mistaken, bull semen can cost upwards of $200,000
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Well that's probably for an in-demand stud or whatever. An average Joe bull would be fine for my plan. I thought it would be super cheap.
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05-23-2012, 11:48 AM
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#10
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First Line Centre
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Just go to a farm and start jerking off a bull. I don't see what the problem is. You can use a bucket, or perhaps your mouth to retrieve it. I'm not sure what you're used to for this type of thing.
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05-23-2012, 11:52 AM
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#11
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Norm!
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Its not like your going to buy a jar of the stuff, you're buying it by the straw and they range from a couple of bucks to thousands of bucks, and a straw doesn't carry all that much.
(My uncle used to breed bulls and made a small fortune at it)
The cost is based around lineage traits and if the bull is dead or not.
If you're doing it as a prank it could be very expensive to fill a bunch of paint balls with Bovine weiner wine. I don't know if a Straw is going to even fill a paint ball (1/2 mililitre per straw).
And if your going for a gross out joke why not take it all the way and use human sperm?
You just need to either man up for the extraction or hire someone to do it for you.
__________________
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
Last edited by CaptainCrunch; 05-23-2012 at 11:54 AM.
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05-23-2012, 11:57 AM
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#12
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Supporting Urban Sprawl
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yasa
Just go to a farm and start jerking off a bull. I don't see what the problem is. You can use a bucket, or perhaps your mouth to retrieve it. I'm not sure what you're used to for this type of thing.
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I was totally fine until I read this post, and then I lost it. My boss is looking at me like I am on crack.
Good thing it is lunch time.
__________________
"Wake up, Luigi! The only time plumbers sleep on the job is when we're working by the hour."
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05-23-2012, 11:57 AM
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#13
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Powerplay Quarterback
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch
Its not like your going to buy a jar of the stuff, you're buying it by the straw and they range from a couple of bucks to thousands of bucks, and a straw doesn't carry all that much.
(My uncle used to breed bulls and made a small fortune at it)
The cost is based around lineage traits and if the bull is dead or not.
If you're doing it as a prank it could be very expensive to fill a bunch of paint balls with Bovine weiner wine. I don't know if a Straw is going to even fill a paint ball (1/2 mililitre per straw).
And if your going for a gross out joke why not take it all the way and use human sperm?
You just need to either man up for the extraction or hire someone to do it for you.
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Sounds like somebody is laying some groundwork for a Part-time job.
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05-23-2012, 11:58 AM
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#14
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Norm!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Misterpants
Sounds like somebody is laying some groundwork for a Part-time job.
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Yeah, Fotze's momma phoned me looking for a hookup, but I'm busy, but the light bulb went off with the bull thing.
__________________
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
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05-23-2012, 12:00 PM
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#15
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Powerplay Quarterback
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch
Yeah, Fotze's momma phoned me looking for a hookup, but I'm busy, but the light bulb went off with the bull thing.
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How's your aim, can you get it in a paintball?
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05-23-2012, 12:01 PM
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#16
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Norm!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Misterpants
How's your aim, can you get it in a paintball?
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I don't know man, I usually deal with face sized objects myself.
__________________
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
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05-23-2012, 12:03 PM
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#17
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That Crazy Guy at the Bus Stop
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Springfield Penitentiary
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Why bull semen?
Cat, dog, human, racoon, horse etc would all be about the same, no? Is there something specific to bull semen that will make this worth it?
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05-23-2012, 12:04 PM
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#18
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Took an arrow to the knee
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Toronto
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But why specifically bull semen? Are you inseminating cows from a distance?
__________________
"An adherent of homeopathy has no brain. They have skull water with the memory of a brain."
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05-23-2012, 12:07 PM
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#19
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Norm!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cecil Terwilliger
Why bull semen?
Cat, dog, human, racoon, horse etc would all be about the same, no? Is there something specific to bull semen that will make this worth it?
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Wow, extracting goo from a racoon would probably involve taking your life into your hands . . . so to speak
Why not just go for the motherload and wank a badger.
__________________
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
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05-23-2012, 12:09 PM
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#20
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That Crazy Guy at the Bus Stop
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Springfield Penitentiary
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch
Wow, extracting goo from a racoon would probably involve taking your life into your hands . . . so to speak
Why not just go for the motherload and wank a badger.
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I was just throwing out animal names. I was gonna say mouse but seems to me that would take way too long to get the desired amounts.
But seriously, if OP needs semen for a prank, who gives a #### what kind. Is it somehow more or less disgusting to be pelted with human vs dog vs bull semen?
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Can just anybody buy bull semen?
