Quote:
Originally Posted by fotze
colder than a witches tit.
|
...in a brass bra.
My grandpa used to use little sayings for everything, most of which cannot be repeated here. Some of the ones I remember...
Colder than a whores heart.
Hotter than the hubs of hell.
Hotter than a half facked fox in a forest fire.
...if your aunt had balls she'd be your uncle.
...is as close as damnit is to swearing.
You can wish in one hand, piss in the other and see which one fills up first.
That girl wouldnt be too bad looking if her face filled in around her teeth.
also, that girl could eat corn on the cob thru a tennis racket.
When I would yawn, he would tell me to grab my ankle before I turn inside out.
Im so hungry my stomach thinks my throat's been slit.
Im so hungry my backbone is giving my bellybutton a blister.
Im so hungry I could eat the arsehole out of a dead skunk.
If that don't be cockfighting.
Thats slicker than a greased cookie sheet.
That girls face looks like a fried gumboot.
Im so thirsty I could drink piss from a gumboot.
He also would take old songs or rhymes and turn them around, for instance...
A gum chewing girl and a cud chewing cow
Are kind of alike, but different somehow
Ive often wondered, but now I know how
Its the thoughtful look on the face of the cow
Old mother hubbard
she went to the cupboard
to fetch her poor daughter a dress
but when she got there
the cupboard was bare
and so was her daughter I guess.
Most of these are not really common old sayings, but they are definitely old school.
