03-29-2008, 02:21 AM
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#1
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Not a casual user
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: A simple man leading a complicated life....
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Man Caught Having Sex with a Picnic Table
BELLEVUE, OH -- A man in central Ohio is accused of having sex with his picnic table.
The investigation began when a tipster gave police three DVDs showing Arthur Price having sexual intercourse with a metal round table on his deck.
The incidents occurred between January and March 2008.
Police say the DVDs show Price involved in a sex act in his bedroom. He walks out to his deck, tilts the table on its side and has sex with it.
http://www.firstcoastnews.com/news/s...storyid=105778
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03-29-2008, 02:42 AM
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#2
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Calgary
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I was going to say he likes it rough assuming it was a wood picnic table.... It would have been gold.....
__________________
Fireside Chat - The #1 Flames Fan Podcast - FiresideChat.ca
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03-29-2008, 03:25 AM
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#3
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Has lived the dream!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Where I lay my head is home...
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Ok, as funny as that is, aren't you allowed to do pretty much whatever you want on your own property? Or is this another one of those looney laws? Or just more of a slide of US freedoms esp sexual.
Hey one state banned sex toys...
Seriously, how is this man getting charged...?
Last edited by Daradon; 03-29-2008 at 03:29 AM.
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03-29-2008, 03:30 AM
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#4
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First Line Centre
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Dead Rear, AB
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If that's illegal...lock me up. 
Seriously though, this guy has some issues. Perhaps he is unaware of "hookers and blow". 
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03-29-2008, 03:34 AM
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#5
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Lifetime Suspension
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With or Without Lube???
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03-29-2008, 04:09 AM
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#6
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CP's Resident DJ
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: In the Gin Bin
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They finally caught Fotze.
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03-29-2008, 04:58 AM
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#7
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Atomic Nerd
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Calgary
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SteveToms
With or Without Lube???
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Don't bring me into this
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03-29-2008, 09:15 AM
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#8
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Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Somewhere in Utah
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It is about time someone stood up for the rights of picnic tables. They have been getting exploited for years
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03-29-2008, 09:26 AM
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#9
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Franchise Player
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fotze
No, I like PicaNik baskets.
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That's hilarious. 
I can always count on you for a good laugh.
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03-29-2008, 09:33 AM
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#10
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n00b!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Daradon
Ok, as funny as that is, aren't you allowed to do pretty much whatever you want on your own property? Or is this another one of those looney laws? Or just more of a slide of US freedoms esp sexual.
Hey one state banned sex toys...
Seriously, how is this man getting charged...?
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I'm guessing you can do whatever you want with your household items if it's in the privacy of your own home where the public has no chance of walking by and getting a glance. Making sweet love to your picnic table in clear view on your deck is probably a no-no.
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03-29-2008, 09:49 AM
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#11
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Has lived the dream!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Where I lay my head is home...
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^^^ a silly rule.
In truth I know that can be contested in many places in Canada, I don't know how it flows in the states though.
Whatever happened to 'if you don't like it, don't watch...'
But no one wants to be responsble for themselves, they wanna blame it on someone else.
Media did this to my kids,
Heavy metal did this to my son,
Come on.
If the person didn't find it so interesting, they probably wouldn't have filmed it.
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03-29-2008, 10:18 AM
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#12
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Lifetime Suspension
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GeeDee picnic table was asking for it, it's not like that little bit of fabric it wears covers much!
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03-29-2008, 10:36 AM
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#13
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Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Mahogany, aka halfway to Lethbridge
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fotze
No, I like PicaNik baskets.
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That's Yogi, not Fozzy!
(I think Fozzy likes Kermit...  )
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onetwo and threefour... Together no more. The end of an era. Let's rebuild...
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03-29-2008, 10:45 AM
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#14
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Income Tax Central
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Has this man never heard of Hookers before?
Hookers man, hookers. Infinitely superior to any inanimate object when intercourse is involved.
...and blow.
__________________
The Beatings Shall Continue Until Morale Improves!
This Post Has Been Distilled for the Eradication of Seemingly Incurable Sadness.
The World Ends when you're dead. Until then, you've got more punishment in store. - Flames Fans
If you thought this season would have a happy ending, you haven't been paying attention.
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03-29-2008, 11:05 AM
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#15
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Wucka Wocka Wacka
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: East of the Rockies, West of the Rest
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Quote:
Originally Posted by onetwo_threefour
(I think Fozzy likes Kermit... )
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*sigh* and if wasn't for that byatch Piggy we could be together....wakka-wakka-wakka
__________________
"WHAT HAVE WE EVER DONE TO DESERVE THIS??? WHAT IS WRONG WITH US????" -Oiler Fan
"It was a debacle of monumental proportions." -MacT
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03-29-2008, 11:10 AM
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#16
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Stern Nation
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meh, these things happen. i was at crap-tire the other day and i must say the spring 2008 tables looked good, real good.
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03-29-2008, 11:25 AM
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#17
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Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Mahogany, aka halfway to Lethbridge
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At least he wasn't a pedophile...
__________________
onetwo and threefour... Together no more. The end of an era. Let's rebuild...
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03-29-2008, 07:09 PM
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#18
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Norm!
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My god, will no one think of the Picnic tables?
Was this consensual or did the Picnic table just have to lie there silently in shame and take it?
I don't see any comments from the victim, who was probably sitting in the sun on a pleasant day minding its own business, when this . . . this thing hopped on top and started pounding away on his formerly pristine finish.
And I'm sure that some family that buys this table at a garage sale will be surprised when they find out that it came with a additional bonus of secret sauce.
__________________
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
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03-29-2008, 07:22 PM
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#19
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: 161 St. - Yankee Stadium
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Cue the "woody" jokes
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03-29-2008, 07:47 PM
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#20
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Lifetime Suspension
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Creston
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Id like to know why this picnic table was out on the deck all alone. I mean it should have known that there are guys like this out there. This table has a history of being seen with all sorts of men; Sometimes more than one on the same day. I blame the picnic table for being so reckless. It asked for it.
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