Blast from the past

[Hanna Sniper]

Getting ready for minor hockey and a parents meeting I was looking through some of my old files looking for a couple handouts I used from the past... then I ran across that offer to an agent to sign Hatcher here in the CPHL

to set a back drop the Hurricanes (me) had a very difficult time with the whole agent process. My key players signed elsewhere plus i wasn't able to add key UFA as well (as much my fault as anything, I just learned that If i was a GM i would need to hire someone else to negotiate contracts). Anyways, with a new FA period I attempted to put that past in the past and went into full PR a$s kissing and sales pitch to change my luck... I thought I would post the UFA offer here for kicks.

What Ever It Takes

Player: Derian Hatcher
Age: 34
Position D
OV: 81ov
Contract Offer: 3yrs at 10 million 1W (No Trade optional)
Link: http://www.forecaster.ca/cbc/hockey/player.cgi?1623

Nothing but the best for Mr. Hatcher and *AGENT* Representation, we here in the Carolina Hurricanes organization don’t lolly around when it comes time in giving our players what they fully deserve. We take pride in the names on the back of our jerseys not the crest on the front! When Milan Hejduk broke the single season goal scoring record, it wasn’t about the GM, not the team… we made sure that the player got his due credit http://home.cogeco.ca/~babylon/cphl/news/hejduk59.htm When it comes to showcasing it’s stars the Hurricanes aim to please.

Imagine this….

CPHL League Commissioner *Commissioner name*picks up the mike as 21,000 screaming Caniac’s celebrating the overtime goal in the 7th game of the 2007 Stanley Cup Final as Derian Hatcher, a huge UFA signing by the Hurricanes in the offseason assists on the game winning goal and extending his point streak to 21 games “First of all, I would like to thank the “insert western team here” for one hell of a run and for an exciting final [fans cheer with anticipation and the excitement jumps another two levels]… “An without further a due I would like to present you the 2006-07 Stanley Cup Champions, come get your cup Derian …
http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a2.../hatcher01.jpg
As the celebration filters down on the ice and all the team and player photographs have been taken Derian picks up the Stanley Cup and escorts it to the players dressing room where CBC’s Scott Oake awaits… “Derian, do you have anything to say to everyone watching back home”… Derian, rubbing the champagne from his eye and trying to hold back the tears “first of thing Scott, I would like to thank my agent *AGENT* for bringing me here to Carolina, if it wasn’t for him the season would never have been possible.. *AGENT* called me in the offseason and told me that at 12:01 on July 1st that Darryl Sutter and the Hurricanes were interested in signing me I was excited. But when I found out that *AGENT* not only stole the show and had me on the front of every newspaper once FA signing began, but also made me the highest paid Defenseman in CPHL history I was floored… *AGENT*, I know you’re watching back home… this Cups for you”

The Carolina Hurricanes are all about their players and the respect that they deserve. Just ask recently signed winger Dylan Hunter. Dylan wanted a chance to make headlines, and for our player the Hurricanes delivered http://forum.calgarypuck.com/showthread.php?t=27150 With Derian in the mix for the Hurricanes defenders, he won’t be alone, along side him on the blue line will be one of the toughest defensive units to be assembled in the CPHL… check out these numbers
Derian Hatcher - 6’5” 235 lbs 81DF (*AGENT* Representation)
Mike Rathje - 6’5” 235 lbs 78DF (*AGENT* Representation)
Hall Gill - 6’7” 250 lbs 76DF
Sean Hill - 6’0” 211 lbs 76DF
Brad Lukowich - 6’1” 205 lbs 71DF (*AGENT* Representation)
Mike Komisarek - 6’4” 241 lbs 71DF

As you can see, Darryl Sutter and the Carolina Hurricanes will be centering their game plan around their star player Derian Hatcher, this defence was build for a hard nose defenseman like himself. All we need know is for Derian and his agency *AGENT* Representation to sign the dotted line and leave the rest up to the Hurricanes PR group to send shockwaves through the CPHL with the biggest offseason signing of the year

We the Hurricanes are prepared to give Derian everything he wants… he wants to be the highest paid player in CPHL history… yes sir Mr Hatcher here’s your 10 million a season… you want two season, why yes Sir Mr Hatcher will pay you 10 million for 2 seasons as well… Whats that Mr. Hatcher?, yes no problem .. you want 10 million for 3 seasons you got it… 1 way contract.. yes of course Mr Hatcher we wouldn’t dare ask you to take anything less… A No Trade Contract… well Mr Hatcher, we really think that no trade contracts are not the best thing for a fantasy league but if you insist Mr Hatcher we will give you whatever you want… we won’t ask you to negotiate, whatever it takes, the Carolina Hurricanes would be proud to have you as a hero to our young hockey fans for years to come

Thanks *AGENT* for taking the time to read our offer, hopefully you have good news for me as well

Hurricanes GM
Doug

Offer
3rys 10 million 1W (No Trade Optional)

[Hanna Sniper]

Signing
http://forum.calgarypuck.com/showthr...hlight=hatcher

and a great quote from the post by Hatcher

When questioned about he footspeed and whether it would be a problem keeping up to the forwards in the Gretzky Conference Hatcher responded “well I’m not as quick as I used to be, you’re right on that one, but I think I make up with it with my elbow speed”

[Goffie]

haha...how can the agent refuse a proposal like that!