World's Best Coach

[Temporary_User]

I love this guy!

A girls soccer coach who told parents of his 6- and 7-year-old charges that he expected his players to “kick ass” has resigned. [...] In an e-mail message to parents last week, Kinahan wrote that the girls on his team would “fall, get bumps, bruises and even bleed a little. Big deal, it’s good for them (but I do hope the other team is the one bleeding) [....] Kinahan also wrote that he expected “that the ladies be put on a diet of fish, undercooked red meat and lots of veggies ... Protein shakes are encouraged, and while blood doping and HGH use is frowned upon, there is no testing policy.”

Article includes original email message
http://www.patriotledger.com/sports/...-coach-resigns

[SteveToms]

Locke?

[edn88]

Maybe he can coach in Edmonton - although he seems like he might be too tough for a guy like Hemsky

[Locke]

That is fataing hilarious!!

Those quotes are GOLD:

Park said a major concern for league officials was Kinahan’s comments about referees.
“My heckling of the refs is actually helping them develop as people,” he wrote.

Kinahan said his message was “largely (albeit not completely) meant in jest.”

I kind of want to do this, but my parents would FREAK.

[Locke]

This is priceless....

We do not cater to superstars, but prefer the gritty determination of journeymen who bring their lunch pail to work every week, chase every ball and dig in corners like a Michael Vick pit bull. Unless there is an issue concerning the health of my players or inside info on the opposition, you probably don’t need to talk to me. Coach MacDonald has been designated “good guy” this year.

Some say soccer at this age is about fun and I completely agree. However, I believe winning is fun and losing is for losers. Ergo, we will strive for the “W” in each game

No junk food. Protein shakes are encouraged, and while blood doping and HGH use is frowned upon, there is no testing policy. And at the risk of stating the obvious, blue slushies are for winners.

These are my views and not necessarily the views of the league (but they should be). I recognize that my school of thought may be an ideological shift from conventional norms.

He is clearly being hilariously sarcastic, but this is awesome!!

[CaptainCrunch]

This guy is awesome and right. Shame on the parents who want to raise the next generation of wussies.

[Ford Prefect]

Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch

This guy is awesome and right. Shame on the parents who want to raise the next generation of wussies.

Ya, somebody has to develop future Coiler draft picks.

[Locke]

I actually emailed this article to the head office at my club, and I just popped over there to see if they got it, and they were howling with laughter, they thought it was hysterical and they said that they thought I'd be the one to do this, it just fits with my sense of humour.

I think its hilarious and I kind of want to try it, but they quickly talked me out of that. Nothing bad is going to happen because its a joke, but damn is this funny.