crazy emotional and stress problems. please help

[MonsieurFish]

ok. all of my life i've been one of the happiest guys ever. i'm a young guy, 18 years old, and i just entered my first year of engineering at the u of c. after the first couple months... i've been having all sorts of stress problems. at first i thought these were legitimate problems, but by now i've realised that the cause of my thinking is stress.

simply put: i'm not thinking straight. i think so negatively right now and every little thing bugs me and i am not convinced things are going to get better. it's affecting my relationship and it's absolutely crushing me.

i have had a few phases recently where i've thought normally again for a short period of time(like an hour) and i've done my best to remember everything i thought and how in reality.... this isn't that big of a deal. but then i go back to being stressed out and forget every good thought i had in my mind.

so how can i get over this hump. i'm telling you i was the happiest i'd been up until 2 months ago, and now i'm so miserable and so not myself and i realise it... i just can't change it. it seems like its become a habit.

i'm trying something called thought stopping to get rid of my negative thoughts but i just don't know what to do. any advice? thanks

[Phanuthier]

Welcome to 1st year engineering!

Seriously... thats the long and short of it. Alot of people go through it. Not to sound like an ass, but some people get over it, some don't. I would say just recognize the majority of the people around you are going through it as well, and make a plan about how you'll get through it rather then just spinning your tires.

[MelBridgeman]

Welcome to life!! Seriously....you'll get throught it...been through it myself especially when you leave the cozy place of public education....

[HOOT]

Isn't this more an Off-Topic thing?

Anyways...welcome to life!

[FireFly]

Someone I know told me once that visualization is the key. Visualize yourself as a duck with water rolling off your back. It will relax you and help to get rid of your anger.

I hope that helps. I know what it's like to be constantly angry. I was there and I'm not anymore. You'll get through it.

Also, take a few days off and don't think. Just enjoy them. Don't worry about tomorrow because it will bring what it's going to.

Also, you may want to consider switching majors. If engineering is making you that angry, it's probably not something you should be doing for the rest of your life. If you LOVE it, forget that, but if you do LOVE it, why was it the trigger that turned you angry? If not that, then what? Find the root cause of it and remove it.

[BlackArcher101]

Try watching The Secret maybe? You can ignore your natural thoughts, force yourself to think positive and in no time you'll be a rich and prosperous engineer with nice cars, babes on each arm and one on your leg too, all without doing a single thing.

On second thought, what you are going through is normal... especially for an engineering student. Maybe give a school counselor a try... they helped me a bit before.

[CrusaderPi]

Meh, try to eat good, exercise, and prioritize your tasks. Failing that, think about a liberal arts degree.

And above all, remember this helpful quote from Lou Holtz,

“Don't tell your problems to people: eighty percent don't care; and the other twenty percent are glad you have them”

[Kybosh]

It sounds like you're going through some standard emotions for someone new at university. Your university experience forces you to question everything you thought you knew about yourself. Questioning your future is one of the hardest things you will do (and it won't stop I'm afraid). The key is to try to surround yourself with good people and find activities that you enjoy. Also, don't let your frustrations with school push the things you love away, that would be the worst.

[SarichFan]

It's seriously life just molding your brain to deal with the stress that comes with maturing. I'd just deal with it as best you can, you really can't do anything about it. Just gotta ride the wave.

[BEANZ]

Meditation... Seriously, I have a very stressful career and have had anxiety/ over thinking problems in the past I tried a few other things but found meditation to be amazing. Check it out on the web just search stress relief meditation. PM me if you want some info.

Otherwise try it, spend 2 minutes sitting alone and only think about your breathing, it will be difficult at first but over time you will find you are able to concentrate deeper and longer. This will just help you focus on you, which is very important and to often forgot about. Good luck!

[cheung31]

I felt similarly in my first year engineering. It is not fun. Now in my 3rd year, I've reflected on all of my mistakes I've made in my first 2 years. I've made effort to correct them the best that I can. This meant managing my time properly. But the most important thing I wanted to do was minimize stress. You don't know how bad it was this semester with some poor group members in some projects and assignments. I had stress, I won't lie, but I made sure it didn't get under my skin.

I think you'll get used to it with time, that's life. Good luck, and make the best of your breaks.

[Dion]

What works for me is trying to visualize a peaceful place in my mind. I do this with the help of some relaxation music.

Exercise is also a great stress reliever. Great way to work off that nervous energy.

What you are going through is just life. The pressures and demands of university gets to the best of people.

Best of luck.

[Ironhorse]

Some hookers and blow should fix that right up.

[I-Hate-Hulse]

Refer to some of your Uof101 materials your probably chucked aside, and look up some of the resources available to you. Most students don't realize the resources available to them to help them through.

Take things one day at a time - don't stress out about everything.

Unfortunately, this is how the real world works, having everything handed to you on a silver platter is the failing of high school. You now get to sink or swim on your own accord. You can either choose to fight back, or sink to the bottom.

I recommend fighting. One battle at a time.

[trew]

My first suggestion would be to try to improve diet/excersize to see if it helps.

When I'm under the gun, I have to make sure I minimize and burn off the extra adrenaline from stress. Otherwise, It can get to the point where I can't think straight, normal day-to-day stuff feels bizzarely oppressive and urgent, and I can't sit still.

For me this means, when I am under extra pressure, I mostly switch to decaf coffee, make sure I average 6-8 hours of nightly sleep and get 2-3 hours of physically taxing exercise a week, while eating a reasonably balanced diet.

When time is tight, it's hard to make extra sleep and excersize a priority, but I usually can't last more than a week or two before I start to shut down if I don't find the time for stress management.

[Flameschick]

Not to alarm you or anything, but it sounds like you could be depressed. Could even be SAD or seasonal affective disorder as we are in the deepest part of winter. I'd consult with a counsellor at your school or your family doctor who might then refer you to a therapist. You might end up not needing medication, just some cognitive behavioral (or talk) therapy or even light therapy if it's SAD.

[scottie]

Hi! I got a wee book for Christmas called "the dip" by Seth Godin. The dip is the hard bit you go through when you're doing something of worth. Might give you some insite into what's happening and how to get through it one way or another.

Either that or get yourself a bible and start praying man!

[flylock shox]

Drinking? Drugging?

If yes, that could be the source of some of your problems.

If not, that could be the source of some of your problems.

Sounds chemical to me. Depression, an anxiety disorder, SAD, or a combination of some of these seem likely.

Have you identified any triggers?

Need input, Stephanie. INPUT!

[Cowperson]

The more you move along in life, the more multi-tasking you'll have to juggle.

At 18, you probably really haven't touched on the number of balls you'll have to have in the air later in life, a juggling act you'll eventually give little thought to and consider quite normal.

Compartmentalize them, engage them and move past them. . . . it's probably the lack of organization that will leave you feeling overwhelmed.

At 18, you might also be a bit younger than your compatriots. At that age, even a year of life experience can make a difference.

The observations of a crusty old buzzard . . . . who thinks he lives relatively stress-free.

Cowperson

[Cheese]

1. Talk to your parents....NOT a Hockey based message board! Your parents will always be there...they understand stress, they raised you!