I've just realized that this is unbelievable.
Early last month we decided to change cell phone providers and buy some new phones. We had spent the last 2 years using Sprint PCS here in the states. Tons of dropped calls. We were eager to move on.
Being a US Postal Service employee (the second largest employer in the world) I am afforded some nice discounts from various companies, including nearly all the major cell phone providers. Verizon Wireless' USPS discounts were as good as anyone's and we had heard only great things about their service and most importantly the complete lack of dropped calls and service interruption. Another boon was that my Dad, who I talk to more and more frequently on the phone in Montana, is with Verizon. Any calls between us are now free, which is excellent.
Anyway, we picked out 4 phones. One each for me and the wife and one each for our kids. We are a busy family and are often separated and we felt it was time for the kids to have phones so that they could reach us at any time. We signed up for a plan that offers 1400 peak hour shared minutes for $80/ mo plus $10 for each additional line. Then you throw in my 25% discount through the USPS.
Now the problem starts. My wife began filling out the paperwork when we realized there might be an issue with her name being on the account and I being the employee worthy of the discount. The salesman told us that it was not an issue. He told us that in addition to the 25% discount that all of our activation fees would be waived as well! Yeeeehaw! He mentions that we are also getting a free month of unlimited text and picture messages for each line. We mention that we don't really care about that, but whatever.
So we walk out of the Verizon store happy with our selection.
So in order to get the USPS discount I was told I needed to go to the Verizon website's USPS page and follow the instructions. So I get home and do just that. It requests an email address for the discount. Not mine, a general address that supposedly each discounted group sets up to work this thing through. Well, I don't know about one. So I go to the USPS employee site and check the Verizon discount page. There is no mention of an email address, but they do give a name, phone # and email of the Verizon/USPS liason who deals with issues. So, since it is about 10 PM at this point I fire off an email to this lady and explain the situation. 2 days go by and I get a reply. She asks for my USPS employment info so she can verify. I send it to her. She replies and tells me she will email me when she gets a confirmation from the discount dept that everything is set up and in place. A week goes by....then another. Nothing. I email her and ask what happened. She replies and tells me that she was told that I have to call another 1-800 number to get my discount and that her dept only handles escalated issues.

In the embellished words of Adam Sandler in Wedding Singer "Information that would've been useful 2 freaking weeks ago!"
Meanwhile, bill #1 comes. It's over $350. There is no discount of course. The activation fees were not waived. Additionally, we are charged $10 for each line for unlimited text messaging and picture messaging. WTF? I call customer service, explain the situation and what I'm going to do to correct the bill and why I'm not paying that horrendous amount until the account is correct. They understand and tell me not to worry about it, just get it taken care of with the discount dept.
Well, now I'm armed with the correct # to get my discount. So I call it. I tell the guy the situation and he informs me that the account has to be in my name to get the discount. I should've known. I tell him the story of the very helpful salesman and how he said that didn't matter. He apologized, tells me this isn't the first time he's heard something like this and explains the process of changing the account to my name. So, we go back to the Verizon store to do this. It's over a week before we both have time off together with the store actually open. We go in and fill out the appropriate paperwork to get it changed to my name. I then explain the billing issues to the guy at the Verizon store. He looks lost. He says that the unlimited text messaging thingy is charged on the bill because it was discounted originally in the store. Uh...no. He pulls up our original purchase receipt. He's lost again. He says he credits our account $75 and that our new amount due is appx $480. WTF? That's more than what was due! But...it's been about a month....turn off that freaking text message package before we get billed for it again! I ask him how long I need to wait before calling the 1-800 # again to set up the discount. He asks that I give it the weekend.
Bill #2 arrives. Text message charges again. $10 per line. Grand total is $532 now. **** me running. I'm so steamed at this point.....but wait, there's more....
Tuesday morning I'm on my way to work and running behind. So I pick up the cell to call and let them know I might be 5 mins late. They have disconnected our service for non-payment. $15 disconnect fee for EACH line. You've gotta be ****ing kidding me. So, I call the discount # again that night expecting to get everything settled. The guy tells me that the account is not in my name, it's in my wife's name.
No wonder the online account locked when I tried to sign in with my SS# instead of hers.
He explains the process of switching to my name (obviously he has not read this post!) and I tell him I already did that. He asks when, I tell him last Friday. He says, something is wrong because it doesn't take that long to reflect on your account. Go back to the store. **** THAT!
I called customer service again and was getting the run around and being told to go back to the store to get it switched to my name and address the billing issues there. They can reverse the charges in the store. My wife gets ****ed, rips the phone out of my hand and takes over. 30 minutes later every single charge that is disputed is reversed and the bill is paid.
But we still have to go back to that freaking Verizon store and switch the account over to my name so I can get the 25% discount!