Deadspin - Flames are boring trash

[rubecube]

Hard to disagree with them based on last year's unwatchable on-ice product, but I'm just here to eat popcorn and watch people get unreasonably angry in the replies to this.

https://deadspin.com/a-2018-19-nhl-s...t-t-1829040918

Boring Trash:

Calgary Flames

Why do they suck? The Flames are mediocre, but more important to the future of the franchise than anything that happens on the ice this season will be the #### that could go down with the Flames’ arena while the players are busily finishing fifth in the Pacific again. Calgary’s been playing at the Saddledome since 1983, which means old rich dudes have been practically jizzing themselves at the thought of knocking it down to build a shiny new suite-holder with public funds. The NHL and Gary Bettman tried their best and failed to advance this agenda by attempting to unseat Calgary mayor Naheed Nenshi last year. But even though talks broke down when Nenshi won a third term, they’ve appeared to warm back up again this summer. I love the shape of the Saddledome but I’ve never been, so I can’t speak to its viability as an NHL arena. But so far, the voters and politicians of Calgary have done an excellent job rejecting the stupid expectation that cities should pay the bill for millionaires’ over-extravagant toys. Calgary has previously offered a more-than-fair three-way cost split of $185 million from the city, $185 million from a ticket surcharge and $185 million from the Flames, which the hockey team rejected. It’d really suck if the city were to agree to a worse deal than that.

Will they get better? Johnny Gaudreau is a bona fide stud and Sean Monahan has struggled with injuries but looks to have all the skills necessary to be the team’s long-term number-one center. Still, the division and the West’s wild card race will likely be too tough for the Flames to make any real noise this year.

Who’s a guy to know? Matthew Tkachuk. All you need to know about Matthew Tkachuk is that he is the inspiration for a lovely Youtube video titled “12 minutes of Matthew Tkachuk pissing people off as a rookie.”

[Beninho]

Originally Posted by rubecube

Hard to disagree with them based on last year's unwatchable on-ice product, but I'm just here to eat popcorn and watch people get unreasonably angry in the replies to this.

https://deadspin.com/a-2018-19-nhl-s...t-t-1829040918

Amazing that people get paid to write uneducated garbage. Nothing to see here.

[Gallick]

They might not be owned by Gawker anymore, but their stuff still stinks of their overly-sensational garbage journalism designed precisely to get a rise out of passionate sports fans. Not worth your time, folks.

Subscribe to the Athletic and support actual sports journalism!

[cofias]

Not sure I really disagree with anything in the text. Kind of odd that she didn't motivate why the team was put in this category at all. I guess last year's team was boring trash, but there's a lot of new stuff this year.

[Erick Estrada]

That's his opinion. A lot of fans including myself didn't enjoy watching this team play last season so until they can show this team is different it's fair but he really doesn't mention the Hamilton trade and new additions which is what you expect in a team preview and instead he went out of his way to turn his Flames preview into an opinion piece of the arena situation.

[devo22]

I actually like the "why your team sucks"-thing they do, both for NFL and NHL. There's nothing wrong with laughing at yourself sometimes.

[RyZ]

I thought Deadspin was long gone. Its always been lowest common denominator pop culture trash and I can see it hasnt changed. Kinda surprised enough people read it to keep it viable. Its the equivalent of a 1 hit wonder rapper.

[colbym72]

Originally Posted by RyZ

I thought Deadspin was long gone. Its always been lowest common denominator pop culture trash and I can see it hasnt changed. Kinda surprised enough people read it to keep it viable. Its the equivalent of a 1 hit wonder rapper.

Let me introduce you to Barstool

[dammage79]

So the team sucks because of the arena situation? okay...

Well whatever gets them some clicks. And in social media, bad press if good for business so I guess good for them. They'll collect the pitchforks and exchange them for some advertising money.

[Textcritic]

Originally Posted by devo22

I actually like the "why your team sucks"-thing they do, both for NFL and NHL. There's nothing wrong with laughing at yourself sometimes.

This article is not funny. I like the NHL team roasts that Down Goes Brown (or is it the Onion?) does annually, but this article strikes me as completely irrelevant. It is uninformed and lazy. The entire piece covering the Flames is about the arena situation with virtually NO INSIGHT about on-ice matters. I agree, it's funny when the writer is clever and insightful. This is just dumb.

[TheScorpion]

I will never understand this form of journalism.

[rubecube]

Originally Posted by dammage79

So the team sucks because of the arena situation? okay...

I honestly don't know enough about hockey anymore to know if what the writer is saying is accurate but that's not what the article says. She says the team is mediocre but the arena fiasco is what's worth monitoring.

Oilers entry is kind of spot-on:

Edmonton Oilers

Why are they weird? They completely suck except they also have one of the best players in the world, Connor McDavid, as well as his extremely good sidekick Leon Draisaitl. It’s kind of depressing. Scratch that, it’s very depressing. Last year was supposed to be this team’s breakout season, after making the playoffs for the first time since 2006 and pushing the Ducks to seven games in the second round. Instead, it all went to hell, because even though McDavid had a transcendent 41-goal, 108-point year that would have won him MVP if only his team made the postseason, the Oilers finished closer to last place than playoff position because their GM makes almost exclusively bad decisions and their defense could barely stand up on the ice.

[tvp2003]

Yawn. Unless you live in the city and actually attend games, does anyone actually care about the arena they play in? And if you've never heard of Matthew Tkachuk you probably don't follow hockey enough to start with...

[devo22]

Originally Posted by Textcritic

This article is not funny. I like the NHL team roasts that Down Goes Brown (or is it the Onion?) does annually, but this article strikes me as completely irrelevant. It is uninformed and lazy. The entire piece covering the Flames is about the arena situation with virtually NO INSIGHT about on-ice matters. I agree, it's funny when the writer is clever and insightful. This is just dumb.

yeah, I didn't realize the quoted part was the whole thing. Thought it was similar to the "why your team sucks" stuff they do before the NFL season, which is much cleverer and more detailed for every team.

[rubecube]

Originally Posted by devo22

yeah, I didn't realize the quoted part was the whole thing. Thought it was similar to the "why your team sucks" stuff they do before the NFL season, which is much cleverer and more detailed for every team.

WYTS is a treasure. I look forward to it every year.

[Cecil Terwilliger]

Sounds like trolling to me. Not sure what the point of this thread is.

[sempuki]

Meh. Click bait. If you want pain, why not just punch yourself repeatedly in the nuts?

[Geeoff]

This feels out of context. Like are they going through all 31 teams and lampooning them? I chuckled at the Oilers one, so I can't be mad at the Flames one

[GreenLantern2814]

Until the team proves otherwise, it's tough to disagree. One playoff round victory since 2004, 1-8 in their last nine playoff games, and missed the playoffs last year. Added the head coach and three players from a consistent bottom-5 NHL organization.

I stopped watching the last month of the season last year. Last time I did that, I was a child who didn't care about the Flames.

I'm excited for the year and to see how they progress, but "boring trash" isn't exactly an unfair criticism of this team for most of the last decade.

[djsFlames]

New system, new coaches, about a 30% roster turnover with faster, more skilled players.

Last year's team was boring trash but this isn't last year's team, and hell, if not for injuries that trash would've been playoff bound, in all likelihood.

There are guys that can dazzle still and they're gonna get the reigns to do their thing again.