12-10-2018, 04:31 PM
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#1
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Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: N/A
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Funeral Attire
For context (and not wanting to be maudlin about it), both my family and my wife's family have many members in poor health in their 70s-90s and we're likely days away from one funeral with a fair chance of a second not long after that. In the next five years it's likely we will have several more. It has been a couple decades since I have had to attend a funeral, and so I really don't know what the norm is these days as far as wearing black or not. I also have two young girls; should I be buying black dresses for them? I have an ink blue suit... should I be buying a full on black one? Does it make a difference if it's a church funeral vs. a non-church funeral home kind of place?
Advice and comments about your recent experiences would be helpful, thanks.
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12-10-2018, 04:35 PM
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#2
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Not sure
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I've been to several recently unfortunately. Church, funeral home and even one outdoors. Wore a black suit with a white shirt and neutral tie each time.
Doesn't really need to be anything special, just respectful.
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12-10-2018, 04:36 PM
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#3
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Franchise Player
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Nm
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12-10-2018, 04:38 PM
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#4
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Sylvan Lake
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Black/Dark Suit.
As an aside, I feel all men should have a dark suit.
__________________
Captain James P. DeCOSTE, CD, 18 Sep 1993
Corporal Jean-Marc H. BECHARD, 6 Aug 1993
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12-10-2018, 04:39 PM
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#5
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Powerplay Quarterback
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google on: funeral etiquette Canada
but the short version is: wearing black is not required anymore. dress up a bit as if a job interview or wedding
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12-10-2018, 04:45 PM
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#6
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Craig McTavish' Merkin
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My friend passed away a few weeks ago. He was a Canucks fan and his wife asked everyone to come in jerseys. I wasn't able to make it to the funeral but that would have been cool to see in an otherwise sombre situation.
I think as long as you wear a dark jacket and pants you should be fine. I don't think a full suit is necessary.
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12-10-2018, 04:49 PM
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#7
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Sylvan Lake
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DownInFlames
My friend passed away a few weeks ago. He was a Canucks fan and his wife asked everyone to come in jerseys. I wasn't able to make it to the funeral but that would have been cool to see in an otherwise sombre situation.
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I had a friend that killed himself, many of us had played on the same team.
We all wore our faded jerseys to the funeral. It was really good to see.
__________________
Captain James P. DeCOSTE, CD, 18 Sep 1993
Corporal Jean-Marc H. BECHARD, 6 Aug 1993
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12-10-2018, 04:55 PM
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#8
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Ben
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: God's Country (aka Cape Breton Island)
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In my opinion, funeral is one time where you should be black suit, with a white or black shirt, and a neutral tie.
It's in vogue to wear flashy socks with a suit, this is a time to keep it black dress socks, black dress shoes.
Funeral, job interview, show some flair, but not a funeral.
__________________
"Calgary Flames is the best team in all the land" - My Brainwashed Son
Last edited by Maritime Q-Scout; 12-10-2018 at 05:54 PM.
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12-10-2018, 05:52 PM
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#9
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Franchise Player
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When I lost my wife a decade ago, what people wore was the least of my concerns. Having said that, I can see how older generations may be disturbed by attire that isn't black/dark. I'd recommend dark suit or your nicest pants and shirt if you don't have a suit jacket.
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12-10-2018, 05:56 PM
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#10
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Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: N/A
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Thanks for the answers. On something like this I definitely prefer local experience to some Google result.
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12-10-2018, 06:48 PM
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#11
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Ben
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: God's Country (aka Cape Breton Island)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RoadGame
Thanks for the answers. On something like this I definitely prefer local experience to some Google result.
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Oh... sorry, I guess you can disregard my comment then
__________________
"Calgary Flames is the best team in all the land" - My Brainwashed Son
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12-10-2018, 07:27 PM
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#12
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: wearing raccoons for boots
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Dark grey or navy works as well. If you are going to wear it for any other occasions might work better than black.
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12-10-2018, 08:10 PM
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#13
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Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: N/A
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Maritime Q-Scout
Oh... sorry, I guess you can disregard my comment then 
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You're honourary local.
I'm taking it similar principles apply for my girls (dark/black). Maybe the Bay... can't recall seeing any solid black at our usual kids stores.
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12-10-2018, 08:23 PM
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#14
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Franchise Player
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Black suit, black shoes white shirt, grey tie. That being said, since this and a casual wedding are the only places where you'd ever want to consider wearing a black suit, a charcoal or dark navy will work just fine.
__________________
"The great promise of the Internet was that more information would automatically yield better decisions. The great disappointment is that more information actually yields more possibilities to confirm what you already believed anyway." - Brian Eno
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12-10-2018, 09:00 PM
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#15
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Kelowna, BC
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RoadGame - sorry to hear. it's weird how there are 'cycles' in life... for a while you're going to weddings like crazy, then it's babies, then it's funerals (at least that's what my wife and i have noticed).
my general rule for funerals is dress shoes, dark pants and dress shirt, maybe a tie.
my dad's funeral was last september and that's exactly what i wore. for our kids, they were just in nice outfits (our daughter would have been 4 and was in a pretty dress, our son was 2 and was in nice pants (probably khakis) and a little button up shirt).
i think the main thing is to be respectful - would whoever you are there to remember be good with what you are wearing? a hockey buddy of mine passed away about a year ago and a bunch of people at the funeral were in jeans and a t-shirt... and knowing my buddy, he would have been totally fine with that.
__________________
"...and there goes Finger up the middle on Luongo!" - Jim Hughson, Av's vs. 'Nucks
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12-10-2018, 09:03 PM
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#16
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Norm!
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I've always believed in muted colors at a funeral, black suit, black shoes, white shirt. Neutral tie.
I've always believe that you should always have certain things in your wardrobe, a black suit has always been one of them because they do work in almost every situation.
__________________
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
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12-10-2018, 09:10 PM
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#17
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: California
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For kids I wouldn’t worry about dark colours. Just put on a dress. Kids are the best part of funerals as they just don’t understand the loss and are their cheery selves. So having them in brighter colours in my opinion fits.
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12-10-2018, 09:12 PM
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#18
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Franchise Player
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch
I've always believed in muted colors at a funeral, black suit, black shoes, white shirt. Neutral tie.
I've always believe that you should always have certain things in your wardrobe, a black suit has always been one of them because they do work in almost every situation.
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A black suit is versatile? Perhaps for late cocktails, and funerals.
When I come across a fella in a black suit downtown during the daytime, I anticipate him either taking my party to their seats, or parking my car.
Dark grey/charcoal, for business.
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12-10-2018, 09:17 PM
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#19
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: CGY
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What about pinstripes in regard to the funeral? Not the gouache thick kind, but subtle narrow ones?
__________________
So far, this is the oldest I've been.
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12-10-2018, 09:25 PM
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#20
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Calgary
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Funeral Attire
At my mother-in-law’s funeral, my wife’s family decided that they’d wear dark purple as that was her favourite colour. So of course I obliged and got a dress shirt and socks to go with black shoes, charcoal blazer, and a black tie.
If not for those special instructions, I would have replaced the purple and gone all neutral and dark - black and charcoal. I don’t do white dress shirts personally, but a white shirt and black tie looks sharp IMO.
I seldom wear ties as I find that in my business ties are a bit stuffy. But I will put one on for a funeral.
My son (6) wore a dress shirt and clip-on tie from Wal-Mart with some smart (but not dress) pants and shoes. Kids get a bit of pass in my mind, as long as they look smart.
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