07-26-2012, 09:51 AM
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#1
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Powerplay Quarterback
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Someone is stealing all the forks.
So, at my office, we have a fork thief. Someone literally takes all the forks, and we aren't sure who. It's happened multiple times. Now, on to my question...we won't put up a camera in the kitchen for a multitude of reasons I won't get into, but how do we catch the fork thief? Is there something at the Spy Shop we may be able to find in terms of a usb tracking device that is perhaps, dishwasher safe? If I have to use a spoon to eat a salad again, I'm going to blow a gasket.
I'm at a real fork in the road as to what to do, any amateur detectives want to help out? And yes, this is legit.
Last edited by LIP MAN; 07-26-2012 at 10:04 AM.
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07-26-2012, 09:55 AM
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#2
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Powerplay Quarterback
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Plastic forks?
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07-26-2012, 09:55 AM
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#3
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Voted for Kodos
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bring your own fork from home and keep it at your desk?
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07-26-2012, 09:56 AM
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#4
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Supporting Urban Sprawl
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Whenever I grab a fork from the kitchen at work and use it in my office, instead of the lunch room, I forget about it for a day or 5.
You sure this isn't an absent minded office eater? or a flock of them?
__________________
"Wake up, Luigi! The only time plumbers sleep on the job is when we're working by the hour."
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07-26-2012, 09:56 AM
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#5
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Franchise Player
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Metal forks? Magicians love them if they are malleable.
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07-26-2012, 09:58 AM
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#7
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Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Neither here nor there
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Coat them with some sort of highly radioactive substance.....whoever dies of radiation poisoning is your thief.
__________________
"The problem with quotes on the Internet is that it is hard to verify their authenticity" -Abraham Lincoln
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07-26-2012, 10:00 AM
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#8
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Calgary
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+1 for plastic forks
__________________
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07-26-2012, 10:02 AM
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#9
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My face is a bum!
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Take a page out of your local bank's book of tricks. Chain them to the counter. You wanna eat? Crouch down in the kitchen.
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07-26-2012, 10:03 AM
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#10
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#1 Goaltender
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Calgary...Alberta, Canada
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__________________
We may curse our bad luck that it's sounds like its; who's sounds like whose; they're sounds like their (and there); and you're sounds like your. But if we are grown-ups who have been through full-time education, we have no excuse for muddling them up.
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07-26-2012, 10:05 AM
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#11
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Powerplay Quarterback
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Legit, silverware forks. With Plastic ends. I thought this site was full of ideas, I came to CP for answers, and now I have more questions...????
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07-26-2012, 10:05 AM
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#12
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Franchise Player
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do a desk to desk search after hours - you have got to nail this person.
alternatively, you could discard the salads at lunch, and opt for soup (a spoon?) or a sandwhich (hands).
__________________
If I do not come back avenge my death
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07-26-2012, 10:08 AM
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#13
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: Behind Nikkor Glass
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07-26-2012, 10:08 AM
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#14
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That Crazy Guy at the Bus Stop
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Springfield Penitentiary
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It's not about finding out who stole them, it is about finding the best scape goat.
Do like Homer does and blame the foreign guy who doesn't speak much english. Tibor.
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07-26-2012, 10:10 AM
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#15
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Backup Goalie
Join Date: Oct 2008
Exp: 
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They are all at my house. My wife brings one home after every lunch with her dirty tupperware to clean in our dishwasher.
She seems to only bring them back after about a month of collecting
Its got something to do with the nasty state of the office dishwasher (traps never cleaned etc.)
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07-26-2012, 10:10 AM
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#16
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#1 Goaltender
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: An all-inclusive.
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Go on a witch hunt. Point fingers, make wild accusations, yell at randoms in the hall, stare at men while they piss etc. Regular human decency is thrown out the window when office kitchens are at risk.
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07-26-2012, 10:14 AM
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#17
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Calgary
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cecil Terwilliger
It's not about finding out who stole them, it is about finding the best scape goat.
Do like Homer does and blame the foreign guy who doesn't speak much english. Tibor.
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Yet Tibor will still be promoted ahead of the OP.
Oh and this:
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07-26-2012, 10:18 AM
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#18
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Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Otnorot
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Bring a sandwich.
Bring your own fork.
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07-26-2012, 10:22 AM
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#19
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Franchise Player
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Step 1: Put up a fake camera with a sign telling the fork theif you are watching and recording them and they will be charged with theft.
Step 2: First person to inquire about said camera and sign is your theif. Raid their office. Find all the missing forks.
Step 3: Mock fork theif, make sure to point out your superior intelligence.
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07-26-2012, 10:37 AM
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#20
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Calgary
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Yah we have something similar where I work.
I have my own plate, salad bowl, spoon, knife, and fork.
Plastic forks are likely the only thing that will work for you.
__________________
MYK - Supports Arizona to democtratically pass laws for the state of Arizona
Rudy was the only hope in 08
2011 Election: Cons 40% - Nanos 38% Ekos 34%
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