05-01-2010, 09:41 PM
|
#1
|
Franchise Player
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Salmon with Arms
|
Stuupid Questions/Answers/Comments thread
I figured most people probably have some pretty good stupid people stories. So with fresh inspiration I thought I'd share a few.
So I just got back from Vegas. While gambling on the fake horsies there, I decided to get a beer. In my change I got a half-dollar. I had never seen one before, so I commented to this effect to my girlfriend. Another girl sitting beside us laughed and said
"Oh my God, you've never seen one?"
To which I replied, "We're from Canada"
To which she replied, "Well don't you guys, like, use American money there?"
Okay. Stupid response number one. My girlfriend being the nice person, said, "No. Would you like to see a Caadian $5?"
"Sure"
She flashed her a colourful $5
"Oh my god, is that a Euro?"
"No it's 5 Canadian Dollars"
"Are you guy part of the Euro?"
I called her an idiot. I couldn't help it.
Another good one. I was driving by a field with my girlfriend at the time (previous girlfriend) and saw a white horse. I jokingly said, "Hey look! A unicorn!"
"Where? I've never seen a live one!"
"Of course not. They don't exist...."
"How do you know?"
"Umm...I guess I don't. Sigh."
Same girlfriend before the trip:
"I have a question: So is Vancouver in North America, or just America?"
"Haha. You're pretty"
|
|
|
05-01-2010, 10:39 PM
|
#2
|
Offered up a bag of cans for a custom user title
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Westside
|
I went into a bakery and asked the baker for a loaf of bread. He asked if I wanted white or brown. I said it didn't matter, I rode my bike.
|
|
|
05-01-2010, 10:45 PM
|
#3
|
GOAT!
|
Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One muffin, feeling rather flushed, turned to the other muffin and said, "Whew boy. Is it ever hot in here." Upon hearing this, the other muffin quickly exclaimed...
"HOLY ****! A TALKING MUFFIN?!??!
|
|
|
05-01-2010, 11:41 PM
|
#5
|
Franchise Player
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Salmon with Arms
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by MoneyGuy
Did you spell stupid incorrectly on purpose in the thread title? 
|
Nope. Well done. It should've been stoopid
|
|
|
05-01-2010, 11:56 PM
|
#6
|
Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Mahogany, aka halfway to Lethbridge
|
I've got a couple...
A girl that used to be our receptionist, in a conversation about unusual foods said, "Oh yeah, eggplant, that's where eggs come from, right? I couldn't think of a reply so I said "No, that's aubergine!" (True story, except the aubergine comment)
Now on this second one, I have to be careful or I'll get myself in trouble. I have a female relative by marriage who happens to be an elementary/middle school teacher. At a family dinner one time I mentioned that my sister was moving to San Francisco. To that, this relative replied, "San Francisco? That's in California, right?"
__________________
onetwo and threefour... Together no more. The end of an era. Let's rebuild...
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 02:01 AM
|
#7
|
Franchise Player
|
I asked my buddy this question the other day. Couldn't believe just how IDIOTIC his response was!!!
The weight of the suspended mass (M) provides the central force that maintains the circular motion of the puck.
Centripetal force = mv²/r where m = mass of puck and r the radius of motion, v is the tangential speed.
Mg = mv²/r
Magnitude of force = Mg = 1.9 X 9.81 = 18.64 N
(b) mv²/r = 18.64
v² = 18.64r/m
= (18.64 X 1.1) / 0.028
= 732.29
v = √732.91
= 27.1
Linear speed of puck is 27.1 m/s.
Well he guessed 24.5!!!!!
|
|
|
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Huntingwhale For This Useful Post:
|
|
05-02-2010, 02:36 AM
|
#8
|
#1 Goaltender
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by onetwo_threefour
Now on this second one, I have to be careful or I'll get myself in trouble. I have a female relative by marriage who happens to be an elementary/middle school teacher. At a family dinner one time I mentioned that my sister was moving to San Francisco. To that, this relative replied, "San Francisco? That's in California, right?"
|
It could possibly be a really late night.... but I don't get it?
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 03:04 AM
|
#9
|
Franchise Player
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Calgary
|
When I was in high school, I was sitting in the main hallway, reading east of eden by John Steinbeck. The particular copy of the book had a farm setting on it. One of my classmates/next door neighbour asked me "why are you interested in reading a book about a farm, isn't that boring. I get bored reading most books, so I think one about a farm would put me to sleep."
That was the last time I talked with her.
__________________
Fireside Chat - The #1 Flames Fan Podcast - FiresideChat.ca
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 03:35 AM
|
#10
|
Franchise Player
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Tampa, Florida
|
we have some very ignorant folk here. I had a kid during auto tech class tell my teacher (since he was french) that he should go back to Canada with all those other french speakers. The teacher replied.. What part of Canada is french, The redneck replied every single part. Even Alaska..
For once I was awake in that class and laughed so hard this kid left and never came back.
__________________
Thank you for everything CP. Good memories and thankful for everything that has been done to help me out. I will no longer take part on these boards. Take care, Go Flames Go.
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 04:23 AM
|
#11
|
Atomic Nerd
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Calgary
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by wooohooo
It could possibly be a really late night.... but I don't get it?
|
You would expect a middle school teacher to know what state San Francisco is in.
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 06:18 AM
|
#12
|
Lifetime Suspension
|
Well this thread is FOS and FOJUL
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 12:34 PM
|
#13
|
Franchise Player
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Conquering the world one 7-11 at a time
|
A woman was examining the frozen turkeys in a supermarket with a perplexed look on her face. A stock boy walked past, and she motioned to him for assistance.
"How big do these turkeys get?" She asked.
"That's it, ma'am." He replied. "They don't get any bigger than this - they're dead."
__________________
"There will be a short outage tonight sometime between 11:00PM and 1:00AM as network upgrades are performed. Please do not panic and overthrow society. Thank you."
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 01:04 PM
|
#14
|
Franchise Player
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Calgary
|
It's been a few years now and I posted this a while back but...
I was on a Caribbean cruise and was playing at the poker table in the ship's casino late one night. I got to chatting with some of the folks and found out that one couple were from a costal town near Raleigh, N.C. As a hockey fan, I asked if they ever went to watch the Hurricanes.
He said no, they'd probably evacuate before it hits.
|
|
|
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Jayems For This Useful Post:
|
|
05-02-2010, 01:12 PM
|
#15
|
Franchise Player
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Red Deer, AB
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Huntingwhale
I asked my buddy this question the other day. Couldn't believe just how IDIOTIC his response was!!!
The weight of the suspended mass (M) provides the central force that maintains the circular motion of the puck.
Centripetal force = mv²/r where m = mass of puck and r the radius of motion, v is the tangential speed.
Mg = mv²/r
Magnitude of force = Mg = 1.9 X 9.81 = 18.64 N
(b) mv²/r = 18.64
v² = 18.64r/m
= (18.64 X 1.1) / 0.028
= 732.29
v = √732.91
= 27.1
Linear speed of puck is 27.1 m/s.
Well he guessed 24.5!!!!!
|
Here, you can play with this ball
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 01:59 PM
|
#16
|
Lifetime Suspension
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: SW
|
Sex Ed. class in grade seven I think. The instructor was showing slides of Herpes on male Genitals. She left a slide on the screen showing the tip of a penis with a herpes sore on it. The instructor then asked the class if there were any questions.
One of my class mates raised his hand and asked "What happens if you bite it?"
Needless to say, the entire class erupted in laughter!!
.......poor guy.
(No, it was not me)
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 02:07 PM
|
#17
|
Has Towel, Will Travel
|
Here's another sex ed laugher. it was a question and answer session, and young Einstein, who was sitting with his girlfriend (later to become his wife) asks, "Is it possible to get pregnant from oral sex if she swallows?". He followed that up with "What part of body is the vagina?"
No bull. They have about 4 kids, so I guess she swallows.
Last edited by Ford Prefect; 05-02-2010 at 02:10 PM.
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 02:11 PM
|
#18
|
Franchise Player
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Calgary
|
My brother experienced some stupid last Thursday. He was at the registry getting his driver's licence renewed. The lady asks him how much he weighs, he replies "116 kilograms." She then asks him, "is that in pounds or kilograms?"
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 02:24 PM
|
#19
|
#1 Goaltender
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ford Prefect
Here's another sex ed laugher. it was a question and answer session, and young Einstein, who was sitting with his girlfriend (later to become his wife) asks, "Is it possible to get pregnant from oral sex if she swallows?". He followed that up with "What part of body is the vagina?"
No bull. They have about 4 kids, so I guess she swallows.
|
If I recall correctly I took sex ed in grade 4 or 5, so around 10-11 or something...
I don't really see how that is a dumb question for a young kid to ask.
Obviously the kids parents never had that talk with them by that time.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Komskies
My brother experienced some stupid last Thursday. He was at the registry getting his driver's licence renewed. The lady asks him how much he weighs, he replies "116 kilograms." She then asks him, "is that in pounds or kilograms?"
|
Obviously the lady wasn't really listening and just going through the motions. Most people probably reply in lbs, so for your brother, obviously a big guy, she thought she better double check.
My stupid question that I've been asked, was from an old ex of mine. She asked me if the US and Mexico were attached by land.
__________________
|
|
|
05-02-2010, 02:29 PM
|
#20
|
Has Towel, Will Travel
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Temporary_User
If I recall correctly I took sex ed in grade 4 or 5, so around 10-11 or something...
I don't really see how that is a dumb question for a young kid to ask.
Obviously the kids parents never had that talk with them by that time.
|
This was in the 1970s ... we didn't even have sex ed class at the time. This was in Biology 30 during a chapter on reproduction. They guy was 17 at the time, so kind of a stoopid question I'd say. He made a great case for sex ed classes though.
|
|
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 01:14 AM.
|
|