What do you do/say when...

[Cheese]

on a beautiful Saturday/Sunday you hear a ring at the front door and its a Mother, Father, Grandmother and toddler all dressed up with literature from an unspecified church ready to place in your hand?

- I know Jehovahs dont like blood donors...so suggesting you are a donor stops em some time...
- Answering the door naked helps sometimes...but you never know IF it is religous zealots or the people the shrink sent to collect you.


Have you had any good responses to this type of interuption?

[red '00]

Answer the door dressed as Jesus?

[habernac]

ah, the cowards who bring kids with them. I don't even let them get started, tell them politely I'm not interested and close the door. I'll even do that to people who don't have their kids there. But I don't have a problem closing the door if they don't take the hint.

[Patek23]

One time we had a guy come to our house when I was in Juniour High, and he said that he was from the CBE and he wanted to discuss text books and other school supplies, so he invites himself in he comes and sits at our kitchen table and looks around my parents house, we are a Catholic family so our house is full to the brim of crosses, portaits of the virgin mary etc. he looks at my mom and whips out some book for his protestant church and a clipped bible for the main focuses of his religion. We are not like most other Irish Catholics and don't have a huge hate-on for protestants, But I've never seen my mom flip so bad on somebody, she was so passed that the guy had claimed he was CBE and invites himself in and than turns out trying to recruit for his church.


Not really relevant just thought I'd share my story. And generally what I do , is If I don't know the person I don't open the door.

[peter12]

Originally posted by Cheese@Aug 29 2005, 12:10 PM
on a beautiful Saturday/Sunday you hear a ring at the front door and its a Mother, Father, Grandmother and toddler all dressed up with literature from an unspecified church ready to place in your hand?

- I know Jehovahs dont like blood donors...so suggesting you are a donor stops em some time...
- Answering the door naked helps sometimes...but you never know IF it is religous zealots or the people the shrink sent to collect you.


Have you had any good responses to this type of interuption?

I'm polite but firm. I find out where they are from, ie. Mormons, Jehovahs... as quickly as possibly and then firmly establish that I don't share any common beliefs and I am not interested.

[Eastern Girl]

Originally posted by peter12+Aug 29 2005, 11:16 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (peter12 @ Aug 29 2005, 11:16 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Cheese@Aug 29 2005, 12:10 PM
on a beautiful Saturday/Sunday you hear a ring at the front door and its a Mother, Father, Grandmother and toddler all dressed up with literature from an unspecified church ready to place in your hand?

- I know Jehovahs dont like blood donors...so suggesting you are a donor stops em some time...
- Answering the door naked helps sometimes...but you never know IF it is religous zealots or the people the shrink sent to collect you.


Have you had any good responses to this type of interuption?

I'm polite but firm. I find out where they are from, ie. Mormons, Jehovahs... as quickly as possibly and then firmly establish that I don't share any common beliefs and I am not interested. [/b][/quote]
Same here. Find out what they want, then tell them you aren't interested and close the door. If you say no thanks but you don't shut the door on them, they think they have a chance at convincing you to hear them out. So close the door and leave it at that.

[Cowperson]

Originally posted by Cheese@Aug 29 2005, 11:10 AM
on a beautiful Saturday/Sunday you hear a ring at the front door and its a Mother, Father, Grandmother and toddler all dressed up with literature from an unspecified church ready to place in your hand?

- I know Jehovahs dont like blood donors...so suggesting you are a donor stops em some time...
- Answering the door naked helps sometimes...but you never know IF it is religous zealots or the people the shrink sent to collect you.


Have you had any good responses to this type of interuption?

Unspecified Church person: "Hi, how are you this fine morning?

Me: "I appreciate your interest but I'm not interested."

Unspecified Church person: "Yeah but, why aren't you interested?"

Me: "This isn't a conversation. I'm not interested. Have a good day."

That's the end of it.

Cowperson

[Cheese]

Originally posted by Cowperson+Aug 29 2005, 02:26 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Cowperson @ Aug 29 2005, 02:26 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Cheese@Aug 29 2005, 11:10 AM
on a beautiful Saturday/Sunday you hear a ring at the front door and its a Mother, Father, Grandmother and toddler all dressed up with literature from an unspecified church ready to place in your hand?

- I know Jehovahs dont like blood donors...so suggesting you are a donor stops em some time...
- Answering the door naked helps sometimes...but you never know IF it is religous zealots or the people the shrink sent to collect you.


Have you had any good responses to this type of interuption?

Unspecified Church person: "Hi, how are you this fine morning?

Me: "I appreciate your interest but I'm not interested."

Unspecified Church person: "Yeah but, why aren't you interested?"

Me: "This isn't a conversation. I'm not interested. Have a good day."

That's the end of it.

Cowperson [/b][/quote]
LOL...but but...are you saying they canvass the great Cow on his ranch? That would be incredible.

[Cheese]

Originally posted by habernac@Aug 29 2005, 02:15 PM
ah, the cowards who bring kids with them. I don't even let them get started, tell them politely I'm not interested and close the door. I'll even do that to people who don't have their kids there. But I don't have a problem closing the door if they don't take the hint.

ya but...whats the fun in closing the door? Heres some you can try next time...

It's Saturday morning when, suddenly, you hear a knock at the door. Everyone you know is either hung over or cleaning house. They all know better than to attempt any contact with you before noon anyway. It can only be one thing. Religious canvassers. Actually, that's two things, since,like snakes, they travel in pairs.

You peek out the window, expecting to see two kids who look like IBM recruits.Instead, you see a pudgy old lady in a faded print dress, attended by a skinny teenage girl with stringy hair and more freckles than a trout.The girl glances nervously at the slit in the curtain and quickly looks away. Girl Scout cookies? Raffle tickets? Opening the door out of curiosity, you become the proud owner of a copy of their tract. It was the girl who fooled you. You never figured they'd bring a kid along. You rack your brains for some gracious means of escape, making a silent resolution that next time you'll follow your instinct to stand motionless in the middle of the living room hoping that protect coloration will render you invisible.

Rack your brains no longer! After years of similar experiences, I have developed several techniques for turning those agonizing encounters into hours of entertainment. Here are just a few of the great techniques you canuse:

1. Listen for a minute or two with a polite but puzzled expression and then speak in a foreign language. Better yet, make one up. Brand names for electronic components serve as an excellent base for an impromptu language.I've found the following bit to be an excellent opener: "Fritzen mitsuba micht sony leam spartinza. Nakamichi shpont olufsen takamine. Cheloken eraza fleecht?"


2. Before you open the door, put on a pair of Grouch glasses and pour some Pine Sol in a coffee cup. Then attempt to engage them in a serious debate, spreading Pine Sol fumes by blowing occasionally into the cup as if you are cooling it. See how long you can hold them. Try to remember not to drink out of the cup.

3. Pretend to be deaf. Point to your ears, shake your head, and make intricate movements your fingers and hands. This can backfire if they happen to know sign language. In that case, switch to being blind.


4. Interrupt every sentence with a long, rambling, and totally pointless story. Try to work in your latest medical difficulty, especially if it involved surgery or hemorrhoids. Other topics to touch on are flatulent dogs, copy-machine repairmen,spatulas, hypoallergenic deodorants, mah-jongg, asbestos, persistent nose hair, 900-number psychic lines, and genetically engineered vegetables. Extra points if you can get three or more of these topics into one sentence.


5. Tell them you are a druid. This is much more convincing if you live in an oak grove and paint yourself blue.


6. Ask them if they are from the health board about the hepatitis quarantine. Offer them a sip of your coffee.


7. Offer them $25 to talk to your neighbors instead. Give them the money in loose pennies.


8. Tell them you are not allowed to talk to strangers until the assault case has come to trial. More effective if you come to the door with a knife or a baseball bat.


9. Insist that you graduated from high school with them. In an effort to jog their memory, recount various escapades you joined them in. Refuse to be dissuaded from this conviction. This is more effective if thee is a dramatic difference in your ages.


10. Using a cordless phone, call someone you haven't talked to for a while. Then go to the door and make gestures like you'll only be a minute. See how long they'll stay. My best record is 10 minutes.

[habernac]

8. Tell them you are not allowed to talk to strangers until the assault case has come to trial. More effective if you come to the door with a knife or a baseball bat.


ROFLMAO!

[MolsonInBothHands]

I was just going to mention something about that in the market researchers thread because I lump marketers (not necessarily researchers) in with the JW's and Mormon missionaries who come to my door. What makes the situation worse for me, is that I have been baptized Mormon, although I am no longer "active", and haven't been for twenty years, and have no intention of ever "re-activating". However, since I am on their books so to speak, I get phone calls and house calls from missionaries and home teachers three or four times a year, until I get rude enough with whoever it is, so they realize I don't want them around. By the way, I just got one last night, a home teacher, who happens to be a lawyer in downtown Calgary. I have been contemplating calling his office to retain a lawyer to get a restraining order against a church that has been harassing me.

As for Witnesses, the last time I had one come to my door, I was living in a cul-de-sac, and a full size van pulls up, loaded. The people in the van stayed there for a minute or two, then exploded out of the van in pairs, heading for different doors. I knew immediately it was an invasion, so I opened the front door, and left the screen door closed. I then instructed our rather large dog to lie down just behind the screen door. When the knock came on the screen door, the half asleep dog came up startled and full of teeth and *******. I did feel bad, (and later very angry) because the pair that came to my door was an approximately 10 year old boy, and his grandpa standing bravely behind the boy. The boy was highsticking bricks and holding out a quivering hand with a pamphlet, and stammering throught the beginning of his speech as the dog sized him up. The grandpa, seeing the kid struggle, was pushing the kid closer, and forcing him to proceed. I have never wanted to say "SICK 'EM" more than any other time in my life. I told them that I knew who they were, and I was not interested. You should have seen the look of relief on that poor kid.

As for something to say to Witnesses, try this:
"Do you really believe the world is going to end soon?"
"Well yes, it says right here in the..."
"Wanna sell me your car for a buck? You're not going to need it."

[BlackArcher101]

I made up my own religion and printed a few pamphlets. If anyone wants to give me a pamphlet for their religion, I tell them only if they take mine. Usually my pamphlet will be the exact opposite of theirs and they will leave.

[FireFly]

Live in an apartment building.

Actually, they've started accosting me at train stations, and they always send out good looking young men to do it. If it is a good looking young man, I generally have a short discussion about how I'm Christian, and after having a number of discussions with other members of their religion, I choose to stick with my beliefs. They'll usually leave you alone if you're a Christian of any kind. Usually.

[peter12]

Originally posted by FireFly@Aug 29 2005, 12:46 PM
Live in an apartment building.

Actually, they've started accosting me at train stations, and they always send out good looking young men to do it. If it is a good looking young man, I generally have a short discussion about how I'm Christian, and after having a number of discussions with other members of their religion, I choose to stick with my beliefs. They'll usually leave you alone if you're a Christian of any kind. Usually.

That doesn't work with Mormans.

[MolsonInBothHands]

^^^ Yup, Mormons and Witnesses consider themselves "Christian".

[FireFly]

Originally posted by peter12+Aug 29 2005, 12:49 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (peter12 @ Aug 29 2005, 12:49 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-FireFly@Aug 29 2005, 12:46 PM
Live in an apartment building.

Actually, they've started accosting me at train stations, and they always send out good looking young men to do it. If it is a good looking young man, I generally have a short discussion about how I'm Christian, and after having a number of discussions with other members of their religion, I choose to stick with my beliefs. They'll usually leave you alone if you're a Christian of any kind. Usually.

That doesn't work with Mormans. [/b][/quote]
I like to pick apart their beliefs. If they really want to get into a discussion, I'm happy to. I made a Jehovah's Witness cry once, because she couldn't tell me why they believe Michael is Jesus, and back it up. I think it was a Jehovah's Witness anyways... Regardless. I find religious debate intriguing, and enjoy discussing religion with people. As I said though, I live in an apartment, so I don't get the door to door people.

[peter12]

Originally posted by MolsonInBothHands@Aug 29 2005, 12:52 PM
^^^ Yup, Mormons and Witnesses consider themselves "Christian".

Jehovah's hate Christians don't they? Bringing up my Christian belief normally sends the more insistent ones packing.

I will sometimes ask why they have to be brainwashed at 5 am every day till they are 18. Makes their belief a lot less real.

[Clarkey]

I don't get the hate for these people.

Whenever they have come to my door they have been very polite. I take their material and thank them and say goodbye.

Maybe I've been lucky and haven't come across any of the really nervy ones.

While I don't agree with it, I can appreciate that they are dedicated to their cause.

[MolsonInBothHands]

Originally posted by peter12+Aug 29 2005, 12:56 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (peter12 @ Aug 29 2005, 12:56 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-MolsonInBothHands@Aug 29 2005, 12:52 PM
^^^ Yup, Mormons and Witnesses consider themselves "Christian".

Jehovah's hate Christians don't they? Bringing up my Christian belief normally sends the more insistent ones packing.

I will sometimes ask why they have to be brainwashed at 5 am every day till they are 18. Makes their belief a lot less real. [/b][/quote]
Whether they hate "the competition" or not, I can't say, but seeing how they do believe in a man named Jesus Christ existed a couple of thousand years ago, and they need to get his house ready for when he comes back to kick ass, I *think* you can call it a form of Christianity.

Some may try to label either one of them as cults, since they introduce their own documents as "scripture", for example the Book of Mormon. (Which by the way isn't a replacement to the Bible for Mormons, it is a supplement). I have read a bit of the JW literature as well, if only to be able to debate with past co-workers who have tried to convert me. Their literature has been really dumbed down in my opinion, which goes to their belief that you don't need to be concerning yourself with a lot of education, when the end of the world is coming, build Jesus' house. I save the cult label to those endorsing suicide when a comet flies by.

[MRCboicgy]

Originally posted by MolsonInBothHands@Aug 29 2005, 11:39 AM
I was just going to mention something about that in the market researchers thread because I lump marketers (not necessarily researchers) in with the JW's and Mormon missionaries who come to my door. What makes the situation worse for me, is that I have been baptized Mormon, although I am no longer "active", and haven't been for twenty years, and have no intention of ever "re-activating". However, since I am on their books so to speak, I get phone calls and house calls from missionaries and home teachers three or four times a year, until I get rude enough with whoever it is, so they realize I don't want them around. By the way, I just got one last night, a home teacher, who happens to be a lawyer in downtown Calgary. I have been contemplating calling his office to retain a lawyer to get a restraining order against a church that has been harassing me.

Just get them to bring the paper for you to offically sign to get your name off the list then--simple as that, until you do that no reason to complain about harassment.

My buddy did that.