Inheritance entitlement problems

[Johnny199r]

It seems there an attitude of entitlement prevalent in Canadian society when it comes to anticipated inheritance from our parents. Here's a recent Macleans article on the issue: http://www.macleans.ca/society/life/...eritance-wars/.

What are peoples throughts on this? I personally don't expect anything from my mother when she dies. It's her money, why should I be entitled to anything? I see lots of people who seem to be waiting for the day their parents die hoping for their money and even going so far as to claim "that money" rightly belongs to their Grandchildren. It really tears some families apart.

[V]

It's a mess in my wife's family, but it's the parents' fault completely. They've talked about the inheritance for as long as I've known them. Now the Dad passed away and the mother changed the will, it won't be close to even, and now everyone's pissed.

I've always told them it's their money, do what you want, but at the same time, if one of the kids gets significantly less than others it leaves a mark. Like that kid isn't a real part of the family.

So yeah, it's your money, but don't think you're operating in a vacuum.

[CorsiHockeyLeague]

Is this new? As opposed to something that has existed for centuries? If anything, it seems to me your expressed attitude is the more modern trend.

[Johnny199r]

Originally Posted by CorsiHockeyLeague

Is this new? As opposed to something that has existed for centuries? If anything, it seems to me your expressed attitude is the more modern trend.

I think a lot of older people now have more money and assets than at any other point in history, so it's more of an issue today.

[Weitz]

I plan to spend my money and enjoy my life, if there is some left for the kids then they will get an even amount.

I surely hope my parents do the same.

[Ashartus]

Personally I think massive inheritances just promote oligarchy and accumulation of unearned wealth. Let each generation make their own fortune. I don't expect any significant inheritance from my parents and hope they spend their money on themselves, they earned it.

[Coach]

My Dad told me he's spending all his money and I'm totally fine with that. I didn't do anything for it and my parents have given me plenty already.

[GP_Matt]

If you want to help your kids I think it should be done in their 20's or 30's. Waiting to give an inheritance when you are 90 and your kids are retired doesn't really make sense.

That said, my advice for my parents is to spend all of their money enjoying life. I don't need an inheritance and would feel bad if I knew that my parents passed on things that they would enjoy just so that I can receive an inheritance. (I am pretty sure they already passed on a lot when I was growing up.)

[Canehdianman]

I hope my parents spend their money on themselves. They earned it and deserve to enjoy it.

[Erick Estrada]

I don't have any experience in this topic seeing I've never been in a position to inherit from a deceased family member but it's surprising how many people I know don't talk to their siblings based on inheritance disputes.

It's kind of sad but money changes people. It really does. I was part of a split family in that I (oldest) and my brother grew up with my father in small town Alberta and my younger brother and sister grew up with my mother in Calgary. My father did very well in his business endeavors and ended up retiring at 46 but he worked 7 days a week. That said my brother and I both worked in his businesses extensively from grade school on weekends to weekends and weeknights in our teenage years through graduation. I was at my sisters a few years back and just over small talk I mentioned how my brother and I contributed a lot to the business in a conversation where I was more complaining about how we didn't get to hang out with friends as much as we liked and my sister took that as me believing that we deserve a larger piece of the pie due to our contributions as I found out from my father that she called him crying and begging him to remove me from executor of will. I was pretty shocked as my sister and I have a relatively decent relationship and this is something I've never thought of or anything I would consider. It appears that no matter how close you think you are with family that money will always bring out true colors.

[troutman]

Oh, the stories I can't tell.

Estate battles are worse than divorces.

[Johnny199r]

Originally Posted by Erick Estrada

I don't have any experience in this topic seeing I've never been in a position to inherit from a deceased family member but it's surprising how many people I know don't talk to their siblings based on inheritance disputes.

It's kind of sad but money changes people. It really does. I was part of a split family in that I (oldest) and my brother grew up with my father in small town Alberta and my younger brother and sister grew up with my mother in Calgary. My father did very well in his business endeavors and ended up retiring at 46 but he worked 7 days a week. That said my brother and I both worked in his businesses extensively from grade school on weekends to weekends and weeknights in our teenage years through graduation. I was at my sisters a few years back and just over small talk I mentioned how my brother and I contributed a lot to the business in a conversation where I was more complaining about how we didn't get to hang out with friends as much as we liked and my sister took that as me believing that we deserve a larger piece of the pie due to our contributions as I found out from my father that she called him crying and begging him to remove me from executor of will. I was pretty shocked as my sister and I have a relatively decent relationship and this is something I've never thought of or anything I would consider. It appears that no matter how close you think you are with family that money will always bring out true colors.

Some people are just fixated on the belief they "deserve" money as a sign of love and nothing less will suffice. Did she have her own career making her own money? Greed is a powerful thing.

[mrkajz44]

The worst part of estate battles: the only winners are the lawyers.

On another note, I didn't realize you could contest a will like the one discussed in the article. I thought if your will was valid and done correctly, you could not contest it at all? It sounds like any will can be contested then?

[troutman]

Shame on your sister Erick.

Also, executors don't get to decide who gets what.

[troutman]

Originally Posted by mrkajz44

The worst part of estate battles: the only winners are the lawyers.

On another note, I didn't realize you could contest a will like the one discussed in the article. I thought if your will was valid and done correctly, you could not contest it at all? It sounds like any will can be contested then?

Barring suspicious circumstances, only a spouse or child can challenge a will in Alberta. Generally courts here will respect the testator's wishes.

[PsYcNeT]

I'm just crossing my fingers that I wont be left with a massive bill when my folks kick it. As it is, estrangement from your parents can often leave a bit of background anxiety when you know they are both far worse with money than you are.

[Locke]

Originally Posted by troutman

Oh, the stories I can't tell.

Estate battles are worse than divorces.

No kidding, I've had a lot of experience with it over the last year or so. Its pretty sickening.

So, here's Locke's Patented Solution: Spend your money and make sure your kids expect nothing.

The last cheque I ever write is going to bounce.

[troutman]

Originally Posted by PsYcNeT

I'm just crossing my fingers that I wont be left with a massive bill when my folks kick it. As it is, estrangement from your parents can often leave a bit of background anxiety when you know they are both far worse with money than you are.

You won't be on the hook for your parents' debts.

[bubbsy]

hmmm... haven't really thought about this.

I would assume that for most families, any assets that are left to children would be split evenly.

an uneven split would be brutal, and inevitable to create a lot of friction among siblings.

[Calgary14]

I find a lot of people these days have a sense of entitlement in general so an inheritance would be no different. It's just sad when money can tear a family apart, and as someone else mentioned above the only winners are the lawyers