Tattoo as a deal-breaker?

[schteve_d]

I know lots of guys don't mind and even like tattooed women. I hate them. I think they look awful.

My girlfriend who I've been with for a little while has a few small tattoos that I don't like but they are small and in "hideable" areas that I have grown to accept and/or not notice.

She went to a family function in BC without me and just sent me a picture of her new tattoo. It's not a sleeve or anything but it takes up the better part of her inside forearm. I hate it already and I haven't even seen it in person.

She knows how much I hate tattooed women. I don't know what I think. Not sure I can come to terms with this one! It's *&^%*( hideous.

I feel like a superficial ass but it really is unattractive to me. Not sure what to do.

[MelBridgeman]

Once it starts it doesn't stop - get out while you can.

[FlamesAddiction]

How long have you been together? (What is a "little while"?)

If you don't love her, you might want to think about letting this one go.

I should add... this isn't really about a tattoo as much is it is about compatibility. Obviously her getting a tattoo is worth more to her than your opinion of her and how much you find her attractive.

[schteve_d]

We've been together for about six months.

She told me she was getting this tattoo when she went but not what or where it was going to be (was to be a "surprise" which I've said all along was ridiculous as I wouldn't like it regardless of what and/or where it was)

We've kind of joked about it but I did tell her in total honesty that I find tattoos on women totally unattractive.

I think she genuinely thinks that because I've come to accept the other ones that I will come to accept this one but it is very different from the others. This one is dark, big and prominent where the others were small and selectively "hideable".

[WhiteTiger]

If something like that bothers you, you are probably better off out of the relationship. It's clearly something you two are not going to see eye to eye on if she knows how much you don't like tattoo's, and then gets a large visible one. Might be her way of getting rid of you 'gently'.

[schteve_d]

Originally Posted by WhiteTiger

Might be her way of getting rid of you 'gently'.

Yeah, I've considered that but I really don't think so. She is as much into the relationship as I am and we are very honest with each other.....brutally honest if need be.

I think she really thinks that if I love her I will come to accept it. Parts of me agree and think that I really should be able to do that.

I feel like I'm in the wrong but I can't get around it. It makes her less attractive to me. A lot less attractive.

[Derek Sutton]

Yes it can be. I wouldn't consider this to be superficial at all. There is a difference between dumping someone with a birthmark on there arm (superficial) and someone who has a nasty ugly tattoo. I hate them to though and that is just my opinion.

I wonder how many women regret the tramp stamps they gave themselves 12 years ago? and how many husbands hate them now to?

[CaptainYooh]

Originally Posted by schteve_d

... It makes her less attractive to me. A lot less attractive.

Then get out without a second thought. Whatever bothers you now will be amplified a hundred times in 10 years.

[schteve_d]

Originally Posted by MelBridgeman

Once it starts it doesn't stop

Yes, I've heard that from almost everyone I've ever known that has a tattoo.

[SeeBass]

Cant stand ink on people.

Call me crazy but the last thing I would do is ink my nationality on my body for life.

More of a paranoid thought in relation to human history.

[puckluck2]

Not trying to sound like a dick but if a tattoo is the deal breaker then the relationship wasn't worth keeping if she had 0 tattoos.

[schteve_d]

Originally Posted by FlamesAddiction

....this isn't really about a tattoo as much is it is about compatibility. Obviously her getting a tattoo is worth more to her than your opinion of her and how much you find her attractive.

Yes, this is an excellent point and is exactly the way I am currently looking at it.

[SeeBass]

I had a one night stand with a girl who had "showtime" on her lower back so I could read doin doggy.

[schteve_d]

That's funny.

I once had a very short relationship with a girl that had an exploding cherry on her inner thigh.

This is very different!

[chemgear]

Originally Posted by SeeBass

I had a one night stand with a girl who had "showtime" on her lower back so I could read doin doggy.

^ called a tramp stamp for a reason.

[ken0042]

The bigger question- what is the tattoo for? I also don't care for them, but I have seen people get them because of losing a child, or a personal accomplishment like a recovering alcoholic putting something on their arm after a year to remind them to stay strong.

If it's just this decade's version of the Tasmanian Devil or something writting from a Chinese take-out menu; then I don't see anything wrong with that being the deal breaker. You told her you hate them.

To expand on Puckluck's point; if you told her you hate them and she did it anyways- then she doesn't care enough about the relationship.

[Bagor]

Worked with a fella a few years back that had Budweiser tattooed on his inside forearm.

Me: Why have you Budweiser tattooed on your arm?
Him: It's my favourite beer.

Silly me.

Sound's like your gut is telling you to move on.

[Matty81]

If it hasn't already, being heavily tattooed is going to jump the shark pretty quick. Nothing says cool to younger generations like widespread visbility among 40 year old alcholics or later down the road at the seniors homes.

Agreed with what was said above, if you'd dump her over a tattoo, chances are you might wanna turn the page.

[stang]

Lets see some pics. We'll be the judge

[schteve_d]

Originally Posted by ken0042

The bigger question- what is the tattoo for?

No, it's nothing meaningful. Just some stupid vines, flowers and the Walmart expression: "Live, Laugh, Love" in stylish writing.

My mom has the same thing hanging in her kitchen and now my girlfriend has it emblazoned on her arm.