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Old 05-16-2019, 12:36 AM   #16
Dion
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: A simple man leading a complicated life....
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The Snotboy story by our own Reggie Dunlop

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My public transport tragedy.....I think I will need therapy after this one. I have relayed it so many times that I am starting to pick up a flair for humour with it, but let me tell you at the time nothing was funny about it.

October 17th, 2000. I am in Ecuador, leaving the armpit of the earth QUITO (ecuador's capital). I amreally excited to leave regardless of the mode of transport. I was on the local bus, which cost like a buck for the entire 400km drive....I should have known.
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Then the gross part happened.

This kid got bored sitting in the bus for the long trip, so he started to entertain himself. This involved collecting copius amounts of runny snot on his finger/hand and eating it. Sometimes he would rub it in his ear or on the floor before eating it. There was so much snot coming out that I think a ShopVac wet dry vaccuum would have been in order. There was also a pole right in front of him that people would hold onto when getting on the bus. He saw this and decided to include it in his buffet. He would rub snot on his hand, or saliva, and then rub it on the pole. At that point (HONEST TO GOD) he would lean forward and lick the snot off the pole. Someone saw this and gave him an orange, but he quickly discarded this for the pole. I wanted to die.

This went on for over 2 hours. I wanted to move, but the bus was too packed. I wanted to climb over people to get back to my tour group but it was literally impossible to move. I started to panic. At that point this kid saw my right leg. He reached for it with a snot coated hand. I batted his hand away with my water bottle, and this was an apparent signal for some type of game. He became more persistent and eager to rub snot on my leg (in some attempt to tenderize it before giving it a good licking). The lady beside me screamed once or twice (seemingly on my behalf). His mother looked back uninterested (story of this kids life) once but that was it. I never hit the kid hard or even firmly with my water bottle, but I did have to start batting him in the head with it.
https://forum.calgarypuck.com/showthread.php?t=13593
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