[CaptainCrunch]

I mean aging is part of the whole circle of life without the lion king and all the animals standing around you reminding you with a power ballad written by Elton John.

Its somewhat insidious though. I mean in terms of physical feel it sneaks up on you even though we grouse that its almost like it kicks us in the face one day when we wake up and look in the mirror and see white hair or a white beard, or a frier Tuckesque bald spot.

It sneaks up on you when you feel like you suddenly wake up in the morning and your first few steps sound like you're stepping on bubble wrap as your joints pop and explode.

Or you go to a bar with your friends and look at your watch at 10:00 and tell your friends that your leaving because its past your bed time.

Or you get in your car, and fire up your spotify and go to select the easy listening library or the music of the 70's or 80's library instead of your old power metal library because its to damn loud.

Or and worse of all, you go and see your eye doctor for an eye exam and he tells you that its time to either get bifocals or two sets of glasses one for reading and one for distance.

What's next, cooking up a nice dinner of mashed peas and some meat that soft.

Looking at teenagers with complete disdain and telling them that in my day . . . .

That you suddenly feel like a dirty old man for looking at that really hot 30 year old across the room, and then sadly realizing that because you're not a millionaire that you have absolutely no shot and her reaction is more ugh then no thanks.

But bifocals c'mon man. I guess I might as well get that cup that reads worlds great uncle or grandpa in an ironic turn, start wearing slippers around the house. Gathering with my friends in my age group at the blackfoot truck stop to loudly argue about how stupid kids are now days.

Frack man, I miss phones with dialers on it, Original coke, a beer selection that involved maybe 5 beers, 10 channels on TV without hundreds of viewing selection per hour, and movies that weren't headache inducing 3d effects fests.

Fracking bifocals.