Quote:
Originally Posted by Weiser Wonder
What I'm trying to say is that if you consider yourself a trustworthy person (as most people do), then it is kind of ridiculous to take the worldview that other people shouldn't be trusted. That said, I'm sorry if you have had bad experiences with people close to you.
Not trusting people you don't know is good advice. Not trusting family and friends is horrible advice, even if it saves you from getting scammed I can't help but feel that it is impossible to form good relationships without trust. It seems like a risk worth taking.
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I'm guessing you've never been royally screwed by a wife, friends or sibling? Having had some extremely bad experiences with all three has made me a lot less trusting of humanity. Bad advice? Sure, if you never get screwed. It can also be a good defense mechanism though. Whether I consider myself a trustworthy person or not really has nothing to do with it in my opinion. What I'm trying to say is no one should assume I'm trustworthy without really good reasons to do so. Trust is something that needs to be earned, not freely given, in my opinion. You're less apt to get burned operating from that basis.
You're right that good relationships need trust to work. My second marriage is based on trust and is an exceptional marriage ... and has been for 20 years now. And I have a few friends who I would trust with my life, because they've earned that trust over time. But nobody automatically has my trust just because they're a friend or family member. Automatically trusting someone is just asking to be used and abused.
I'm not sure why I'm aguing this out though. If you find trusting everyone works for you, go ahead. Do it. You're a better person than I am.