Same here...
Really easy to be there when you're burnt out, and stuck in a bad set of circumstances with no quick fixes. Be gentle with yourself. You're going to need to intervene to calm the negative self-talk
right now, and get inside of your
window of tolerance.
It's a nice day out, go for a walk until you stop hating yourself. This is what I do, and it works every time. Sometimes it takes an hour or a little more, but usually 20 - 40 minutes does it. It also helps to find a spot like a secluded bench where you can have a good cry. Let it happen, its the fastest way for the body to dump huge amounts of cortisol out of the system.
Longer-term, when you're in your window of tolerance, there are other things to do. Both to expand the window itself, and to address conditions bringing you the stress.
"Myself" is your identity, which like it or not, is a myth that is created and is not fixed. Who you are hating is your past self, for bringing your current self pain, effort, regrets in this moment... and yet your current self barely exists beyond a blink.
There are a lot of things that you can change about "myself", on purpose. You can "kill" parts of your identity and be reborn in new ways.
But.. that's a lot of painful effort with uncertain reward. Thus our ego steps in to protect the brain from even contemplating it. The answers you're looking for are hiding in those shadows.
The ego is very clever and will hide things from your consciousness. It is a vigilant protector, and means well, but will absolutely harm you as an overzealous protector.
Recognize that these negative thoughts are nothing more than a signal your body is trying to send through the shadows, telling you that there is something in your environment that is wrong, harming you, and needs to change. The ego distorts these signals, you do not need to believe the distorted message.
Thank your body for sending the message. Acknowledge your ego for doing what it believes to be best, but ask it to relax and let the truth through. Assure it that you're ready to hear it. Ask your body to phrase its warning in a different way so that you can understand what needs to change.
You will meet your fears doing this. It is essential that you do. Sit and have tea with them, so they lose their power over you, over your identity. Incorporate them in a healthy way that serves you and your purpose, that allows you to be seen and your gifts to be known and shared.
I know that your ego will say you don't have a purpose, gifts to share, worthiness to be seen, etc. All of this is untrue. Let it say so, and say I don't believe you.
The person you hate doesn't exist anymore. You don't need to hold that in your heart. Forgive yourself, and become what you really are.