I was at my very lowest in 2015. I was married to a person who was gone to work overseas all of the time, and we had a horribly tumultuous relationship prior to that.
I decided to file for divorce and I started exercising trying to get back to the same weight and tone I was in my teens/early 20s. It took me til the end of 2016 until I realized my body will never be the same as it was back then. And, I remember the day my divorce was final, I was elated and sort of back to being myself
However, I feel like depression has been zoning in lately. I find the aging process extremely depressing, especially when people I love start dying. I feel like people sort of gain family and friends and jobs until they are in their 40s, and people start losing family and friends after 50 and I seem to be hyper focused on that lately. I have to find a way to cope with it. I have been reading a lot of books lately that attempt to explain why I feel this way but none of them have quite nailed it.
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