Quote:
Originally Posted by nfotiu
I've raised 16 & 18 yo boys mostly by myself without a lot of advantages other than being in a good public school district. Oldest is in a top 15 Engineering school and has probably read at least 300 novels. Younger isn't as academic but keeps a 4.3 gpa and has a good shot at playing d1 golf in a couple years.
I am not a demanding parent at all, granted, but have always but a lot of effort into supporting whatever it is they are interested in.
I can't fathom that anyone would ever criticize my parenting for being too demanding. Lots of times I felt like maybe I wasn't being demanding enough.
I just don't have a basis for where your comments are coming from. It really doesn't seem to be the case in this part of the country.
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Putting in a lot of effort is demanding on yourself, no?
In fact I would say your effort as a parent is the reason your kids are successful. Parenting isn't always about drawing a hard line in the sand and being 'tough' on kids, but rather creating an environment where kids can be successful. Part of that is setting a standard of success, but its its not fair to expect kids to maintain a high standard if parents don't hold themselves to the same high level. Cali is right, its not seen as culturally appropriate to be demanding, and that is why we're seeing kids with some many struggles. Just think the definition of what that means isn't quite explained properly.
Much easier to just give them a phone and let social media raise them.