Don’t post much on here anymore, but always read the forums daily during the season. Read this thread from beginning to end. Been nice to see I’m not the only one struggling. Hoping this post will help me somewhat. Not an overly emotional person, but found myself really struggling at times the last few days. From listening to the barnburner podcast show, talking to the wife and friends about it and reading all the posts and tributes. Been tough to keep it together and not breakdown. Never would have thought a “celebrity” death would affect me, but this has definitely got me.
Like a bunch of you I first saw the rumour on Thursday night. Kept refreshing this site and X what seemed like every 5 minutes just hoping it was a bad joke. Finally went to bed around 11:30 with no official confirmation, but deep down knew it was probably true. Had a terrible sleep. Couldn’t get it out of my mind. Checking my phone every few hours and hoping it was a sick joke and all just a dream. Alarm wakes me up for my day to start. See a couple texts from buddies that I wouldn’t expect and my heart sank. I knew.
My first time seeing Johnny was at a development camp after he was drafted. I always drove down to catch a day or two of these camps. I’ve always enjoyed following prospects and always enjoyed coming down for a day or two. Probably did this for 5-6 years straight with his first camp being the last I’ve been able to get down for. Anyways I remember him standing out. All world skill. Think I questioned his skating or something in my posts about the camp(yikes definitely not a scout). But man he was so good, but so small. I remember seeing him outside in between on ice sessions and he looked so tiny. I’m a smaller guy myself and I was probably mid 20s at that time and couldn’t believe this kid was an nhl prospect. As soon as he hit that ice though you could see the skill.
Followed him closely all through college, world juniors and he continued to amaze and prove his size wasn’t gonna stop him. He won everything. I remember buying a Gaudreaubey baker shirt through flames nation. Still have it and proudly wore it Friday all day as my tribute. I never had a worry he was gonna sign like some fans. Call it blind optimism or whatever, but I always knew he’d sign.
From his first goal in his first game after just signing. His rookie year and the comeback flames team of 2014-15. Purple gator with Mony and Lindholm. His goal against the Ducks. 115 point season! OT winner in game 7. His hug with Mony. Constant OT magic during the regular seasons. Some of my favorite memories. He was the flames. He was our guy. One poster a few pages ago said it best. We don’t get nice things. The flames don’t find these guys or get these guys. It’s tough being a flames fan. It’s tough being a flames fan in Edmonton! For 8 seasons though he made it easier to be a flames fan. He was our superstar.
My heart aches for Jane and Guy. They became rock stars in Calgary. Always enjoyed seeing them on broadcasts when they were in town to watch. Enjoyed Guy’s intensity while watching Johnny that I’m sure every dad can relate to. They were just good people and clearly so was Johnny. Maybe something I definitely took for granted was just how good he was off the ice. Not being in Calgary maybe is the biggest reason, but had no idea how much he was involved in charities and making a difference off the ice. Reading all the stories and tributes though make no mistake he was even better off the ice then on. I hope Jane and Guy can take comfort in that. They raised a hell of a person.
Lastly feel so sad for his wife and two young kids. As a father of two young kids myself I can’t even imagine what they are going through. Seeing her couple posts just breaks my heart. Shes clearly very strong and I know has a ton of support.
Wish I could head to the dome to pay my respects. Great job everyone. I hope the Gaudreau family feels the love. Doing my best here up in Edmonton. Been wearing his gaudreaubey baker shirt or various flames shirts and my flames hat all weekend. No heckles this weekend. A few polite nods.
Sorry for the long and probably disjointed post. Certainly not the greatest with words, but felt I had to just get something down and try to get my thoughts out. Definitely feel better typing this all out. Watching Johnny for 700 odd games I felt like I knew him and his family despite never meeting him. One small interaction a little head nod outside Don Hartman arena back in 2011 when he wasn’t known as a superstar. Who would have known he’d have this impact on this city and all us fans. Proud to cheer him on all these years. He was ours.
RIP Johnny and Matthew.
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