Quote:
Originally Posted by RoadGame
I have been reading this thread without planning on posting. I would have already rated my mental as not great due to a long list of factors that have been building over the past couple years, and then in the past ten days we've had: a family member die (& within days become the victim of identity theft, complicating everything), our summer vacation venue & plans go up in flames, and a counterparty that had verbally committed to a career-defining business deal reneged at the decisive moment.
My wife suggested therapy for each of us separately on the basis of everything going on in our lives, and I have agreed. I'll be honest though, I don't have a good sense of how to make productive use of the time. The facts on the ground aren't going to change, there are still only 24 hours in a day, we still need to fund our retirement... she has suggested that therapists can offer "tools" and/or coping strategies that can be helpful... it's not like I'm finding solace at the back of the fridge or the bottom of a bottle...
If this sounds at all like you and you've gone through therapy and have some tips on how to engage in the process effectively, I'd love to hear it. I'm choosing to go into it with an open mind but it does feel a bit like an open-ended liability (time and cost), and I know I don't have great answers to "what are you hoping to get out of this". I don't know what to ask for that a therapist could possibly deliver.
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Part of the reason your wife suggesting therapy could be she has to work through the issues as well, and if she is your sounding board, then it becomes more difficult for her to work through her issues while trying to support you in yours.
My therapist always starts our appointments asking what I want to talk about today and she listens and then pulls out key topics for us to discuss.
Sometimes just putting something out there and saying it out loud helps. If saying it out loud doesn't work, some people prefer to write it.
Sometimes we all get into our own heads too much and a neutral third party can help.
Biggest thing is to give it a try and worst case, it doesn't work.
Jiri already mentioned but don't call it quits after one person. Took me 5 to connect with someone.