Thank you all for sharing your stories and reaching out to everyone in this thread, even if we are randos. The fact you're talking about it is doing so much more to start healing than you can appreciate right now.
I truly cannot imagine what it's like to be in some of your shoes and can only share thoughts from my own experiences.
Please strive to be gentle with yourself and allow yourself to feel. Fighting the heartbreak, sadness, anxiety, whatever you're feeling by being busy, self-medicating or anything else, will not get rid of the angst, just prolong their impact on you. And once again, BE KIND TO YOURSELF. There is not a correct way to go through whats happening, and everyone is different.
We're all here for you, you got this, and the world is better with you in it and taking part in it. We will be here every step of the way. Always available for a DM as someone to vent to, as i'm sure many of us are.
I'm not usually a written guy and am better talking, so I hope this came across as supportive not telling you how to feel.
This poem has helped me a lot in my life, not sure it will do the same for y'all but no harm in sharing
https://www.desiderata.com/desiderata.html