Many folks are reluctant to pick one executor out of their two kids because they don't want the fight or to risk hurting feelings. My recommendation to my clients is always to "man up", rip the band aid, and have the difficult conversations now.
Pick the person that is most suited (either temperamentally or professionally) to do the job. If you have a professional you trust, tell your executor that they are to go see that person and that they will help them, that it will cost X% of the estate and that you're fine with that.
Certainty, and avoiding nasty surprises, is the greatest gift you can give them.
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