[J pold]

Originally Posted by PYroMaNiaC

I won't say that it doesn't happen. Isn't there some stat that says people form impressions within 10 minutes or some such? Women and men do this. The man decides he wants her. She's decided she doesn't want him (or vice versa).

The issue that I see is that people base their first impressions on looks or sex appeal. Which is fine. You need to be attracted to have a relationship. But they never reevaluate the person of their desire. (She's pretty, but shallow. Or he's cute but dumb as a post.)

As a friendship grows and deepens, the value of looks does go down but only if the person is willing to look again. Susan may not be attracted to Tom, but, frankly, she's showing immaturity that he should really be second guessing. Maybe she wasn't initally attracted to him, but he's a nice guy - been there through thick and thin and when he s his eyebrow at her, it is kinda cute.

They also never reevaluate what they are looking for in a mate. What suited you at 20 may not always be suitable for you when you are ready to settle down. But you are still pursuing the same type of person. (Tom wants a solid long-term relationship based in friendship but Susan is attractive so he wants her despite the fact that she does not show a least one quality that would make her a good candidate.)

Oh it does happen but usually for the wrong reasons, a girl will start to feel sorry for the guy or they just kind find a better alternative basically it just is not a good situation for either one of them, the girls with always dominate the relationship and there will be no balance, most guys just get stuck in a comfort zone thinking that listening to her problems talking on the phone for hours is going to get her attracted to him when really its not…she just think you’re a friend because you are acting like one