Quote:
Originally Posted by FanIn80
It's been suggested by many people that I myself am located somewhere on the spectrum... and as someone who is often incapable of interpreting signals in time to stop talking or change my wording, I can assure you that constantly having people annoyed with me or going through life without anyone ever really taking me seriously or treating me with the same kind of respect I see them treat others with is most definitely a form of suffering.
I'm willing to grant that most of that suffering is of my own doing for never having pursued any kind of diagnosis or help with navigating whatever it is I have, but at 49 years old I kinda feel like most of the damage is already done.
Personal sharing aside, I certainly didn't mean to insult anyone. I have a really weird relationship with this whole thing, as I often believe I know what I'm talking about from my own experience, but I still talk about like I'm an outsider... because one of the things that really terrifies me is that I one day decide to seek some sort of diagnosis/help only to discover that whatever's wrong with me has nothing at all to do with autism - and the reason I'm alone is literally because I'm just an a**hole.
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I hope it's clear that I didn't intend to be critical, but just wanted to share some of the perspective I've gained recently (and I admittedly still know very little), and certainly not to diminish the very real suffering autistic people experience for having the audacity to exist in a world with so many inane expectations.
FWIW I wouldn't have any regret about not seeking a diagnosis earlier...the vast majority of past and sadly ongoing approaches to 'treatment' are ineffective and often counter-productive (albeit generally well intentioned). Gay conversion therapy may (or may not) be a slightly hyperbolic comparison, but a lot of it has been in the same vein of masking a person's inherent slef (which sounds beyond exhausting, and just sad). Thankfully things seem to be turning a bit of a corner, though.