Joel’s love (If people insist on calling it that) for Ellie is a selfish love not a selfless love. He acts because he can’t lose her not because he wants what best for her or respects her ability to make the decision.
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This business about her "agency" is nonsense (and originally prompted my responding to you because I wondered WTF show you were watching ). Unconscious people have none. There was no potential outcome wherein he shot the doctor in the leg, convinced the Fireflies to stop the procedure, woke Ellie up, and told her the gravity of the situation and let her decide. That was not a choice they were going to have. The potential outcomes were that he let himself be escorted away and Ellie dies, he tries to stop the procedure and fails, and both he and Ellie die, or he tries and succeeds and they both live. Could he have shot the doctor in the leg? Marlene too? Yeah, he could have. He made a decision not to leave them alive, but that didn't rob Ellie of any agency. She already had no choice.
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If he lets them live then when Ellie wakes up she could go back. That’s the decision he took away. Then when he lies about it it prevents her from looking for other firefly’s who may have information on the same research. I don’t understand how you can think that Joel didn’t take away Ellie’s choice on whether to sacrifice herself. He first preserved her choice by saving her (holding the doctor at gunpoint with the doctor saying I won’t stop) and then made the decision for her by killing the doctor and Marlene. He also specifically kills Marlene to prevent her from coming after them. He ends any possibility of Ellie making the choice on whether to sacrifice herself.