Quote:
Originally Posted by Hi-Psi
You're welcome to your opinion, as misplaced as it is.  
Most couples spend quite a bit more than $4k for their destination wedding. In fact, most say to expect between $10-15k for a decent budget destination wedding.
What you also seem to be missing is that this is the couples choice to get married wherever the hell they want and can invite whoever the hell they want. And as such, people can decide for themselves whether they want to come or not. All of our close family and most of our friends WANT a destination wedding, especially after the last 2 years of Covid.
I've seen the various threads on various forums and sites regarding peoples opinions on whether or not to have a destination wedding. If I wanted your opinion or anyone else's opinion on whether or not I SHOULD have a destination wedding, I would have asked for it. But alas, I didn't. So feel free to troll elsewhere please. |
Based on your information, Sliver's probably kinda mad you aren't taking out a second mortgage to fund the thing for friends... but also thinking that taking out a second mortgage for a party like this is silly as well.
I'm joking, I'm joking.
Based on your OP, the size seems too big. One of the great benefits of a destination wedding is the chance to have more of a chance to have a fun and intimate time with the guests that show up. Also, if you get married in a foreign location, there's a small risk that Canada doesn't recognize that marriage. That's why some people will do a destination wedding which is basically a combination of stag/stagette party/honeymoon and intimate time with these "closer guests" and then do a relatively basic wedding/reception at home for those that couldn't make it to the destination part (ie: city hall registration then meal sort of thing). bossy's suggestion is a good one. Try to keep the numbers down to 20-30 if possible on a first come first serve RSVP basis. It'll be way more fun that way. For those that couldn't make it, just have a dinner reception at your home city or whatnot. Those that want to blow a ton of money can and those that do not don't have to feel pressured or worried they'll miss such an important milestone event of yours.
For the destination wedding (cruise) I attended, there were around 20 something people that went over 3-4 days. Then there was a 2 day reception in Calgary for something like 200-300 people a month later. It was great for the bride and groom to have their own time to play, then time for them to play with different groups and/or bigger everyone events. The bride and groom chose to pay for the meals and a few excursions so that it would be easier to see everyone on a regular basis during the whole thing. We young people would party, the parents would go and do their own thing. I'd be mindful of ensuring that everyone meets together relatively regularly, but also that not everyone needs to be together all the time.
The bride and groom also requested info and then coordinated between guests and partially through a travel agency. This for stuff like people who wanted their own room/wanted to upgrade the quality of the room, didn't mind sharing (would be drunk as a skunk anyways), had points they wanted to redeem/extra buddy passes they'd like to share with someone, yes/no on different excursions etc.
People like me shacked up in the cheapest rooms got away with paying around $800 ish for flight and accommodations because of the amount of rooms on the cruise we were booking simultaneously through the agency. There was no requirement for anyone to spend anything else unless they wanted to since the bride and groom comped the meals + a few excursions. Others who wanted more opulence and privacy were probably closer to around $2500 for flight and lodging. The average spent on flight and lodging for most people who went was probably $1500-1800/person and most of us typically spent an extra $100-300 in spending on other random stuff. These numbers are a decade old though. IIRC, the bride and groom said they themselves spent around $50-60K total on both the destination wedding as well as their Calgary reception. Approx half to 2/3 of that was their destination wedding (and they paid for immediate family to go + meals + excursions for all guests). I do believe this number included other stuff like their wedding clothes and a few other things as well.
IMO, there's nothing wrong with destination weddings. But I can agree with some of the other vocal posters that there definitely is a way to do it incorrectly or in a way that is very bad optics wise.