[DoubleF]

Others have already gone done the main crux of talking to a professional and that you likely need a change of some sort. I won't rehash it in too much detail, but yes, as others said, get a professional opinion.

I'm not as weathered as some of the others in this thread who have commented, but not long ago, I guess I ran into some of this as part of my quarter life crisis and a few other things that meant I was helping my dad and a few others navigate a mid life crisis. There is no strategy that is one size fits all. OP and others must find a solution that is unique to them. If there's similar solutions that will work to others, thus granting more resources to imitate and follow, great. If no, don't think that you must chase down something that is similar to others.

A few things I ran into that I still find are useful are the following:

1. Part of being an adult is not worrying what is child-like or adult anymore. (Paraphrased)
2. You are a culmination of who you are. (Based on #1), don't worry about who you are, just embrace it.
3. Do more for others than yourself. Their reinforced foundations will hopefully be helpful to you when you find your own foundation in need of repair.
4. Tell yourself to occasionally walk in the opposite direction of where the crowd is rushing to.

The reason for #1 was that in my 20s and 30s, I had enough conversations of weird people who were "playing adult". They'd be miserable at life chasing the fakeness of social media and ridiculing peers for video games, comics, trading cards, toys vs hiking, yoga, self help and volunteering. This bleeds into #2. If you're an adult and you like yoga, self help, volunteering and "old soul" activities, good for you. But if you don't, then "new hobbies" like carpentry, gardening etc. is useless. I personally started going backwards and picking up more of the activities I did as a kid than a stopped as an adult. I felt happier. I tried picking up more of the workout, self help, social media creativity stuff and while it was OK, I felt more drained afterwards. Do what you like. For me, with kids, I think the happiness is accidental for many other parents. They do the things they loved as kids with their kids without feeling weird. Without kids though OP, you just need to do it with either peers or friends or social clubs I think. I think the pandemic has also helped to highlight and show that it's OK to chase down these types of hobbies regardless of age (heavily assumed because in general older people have the necessary money to blow up the values of certain items to these new insane values). I traded in my fun car for a van when we had kids and I was surprised that I felt more relief and satisfaction than regret. Things can change in how we perceive things.

A decade ago, my dad was wonky for a really damn long time after a relatively routine surgery. At that time my brother and I started picking up certain hobbies based on pictures we saw and stories of what he did in his youth. He perked up immediately with a few of them and others didn't have much effect. Focusing on stuff that isn't your thing is pointless. I'd recommend against new hobbies until you start poking around old ones that fell by the wayside first. Recently I think he's also struggling with his identity as a career person. I think he's ready for retirement but he's torn by the concept of losing so much of his career identity. This is likely causing and adding to late life anxiety. What I am saying is that things that used to give you satisfaction can be now giving you grief and vice versa. It's OK to try and redefine those.

#3 for me was important in the same way that others are saying, "My (immediate) family is what keeps me going." For OP, it could be a friend, extended family, a pet, clients/"work baby" etc. To accomplish this, I had to change how I viewed chore, career and hobbies vs personal satisfaction. Doing chores and improving things for others was my new hobby that gave me satisfaction. This was a bizarre and opposite realization that I had from when I was younger. Chores stopped stressing me out as much if I did them for others. It was just an activity that could lead to other things. The appreciation and smiles I received what the hobby and the satisfaction that filled me up more in the current stage in life. Now, again, not one size fits all. This might not work for OP and others and it might not work on everyone. The lesson is that certain pre-conceived conclusions we have in our head might be wrong and changing that view point of things we see normally in our lives can improve it.

The last one is more along the lines of us sometimes forgetting that we don't like what others are doing and we are unique. We've conformed so long that our grief is linked into our own loss of identity or burying or being embarrassed of our identity. I walked outside, grabbed and whittled a piece of bark for 5 minutes using a pocket knife. It was weird, like being a kid again and nothing else mattered other than doing something with intentional focus. The result did not matter. I've done the same with many other activities. Again, successes and failures. But in the end, I told myself to laugh whether I succeed or failed. We live in a bizarre world that makes us feel like we are not supposed to have failure anymore. That sucks. Like it's stated in Whose line is it anyways, "The points don't matter". For some people who fish, a good day of fishing doesn't mean you have to catch fish. Whatever hobby your activity you choose OP, you don't have to succeed. You just have to want to do. Another thing is to be able to focus on something to the point your mind sorta goes blank. Our minds are always going and we're always figuring out how to fill in that mental capacity. I think that's killing our mental health. This sorta ties into my recent random comment. How often do you hear about people day dreaming now? People don't day dream, they don't do things like stare at clouds for hours vs a few minutes at most. A car falls apart faster if it's redlined all the time. Metaphorically, our minds shouldn't be redlined all the time either. The world, like video games has also seemed to transition into a sort of "achievement farming" mentality which is stressful and not as fun. Pushing against that is going in the opposite direction of where others are going and that's OK if that's what you yourself need. It's kinda like a modern adaptation of the old adage, "If everyone jumps off a bridge, would you do it too?"

This isn't an easy journey and it's OK to blow off some steam and admit things aren't going as well as you hoped. Yes, I get that many are worried that others don't want to hear someone bitch about life. I do have a group of buddies where we say stuff like, "I have this that's eating away at me. I'd hope to be further along, but I'm still working towards progressing towards it or I think I need to ask for help to accomplish it". There is no need to default to saying, "Yeah, yeah it's going good" when it isn't. Sometimes we'll say things to each other that makes the other feel better about their situation, but we don't do it on purpose like we have to. "Oh, your thing is pretty awesome and it's way better than my situation, but sorry to hear it has been a point of burden for your."

Good luck OP and others. I hope things go well and you find what you're looking for.