Quote:
Originally Posted by Matata
I have every intention of doing psychedelics a few times in my 40s, there's even a decent chance I'll go to burning man and I feel bad for people that think that age has to limit their options in this way. The greatest tragedy people inflict upon themselves as they get older is they think they're not allowed to indulge in silly fun anymore and that all that's left for them to do is to grump their way into a grave.
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While I don't think your advice was necessarily the greatest for the struggle OP is going through, you're not wrong that continuing to have fun is one of the keys to happiness.
When my dad and then my brother died in quick succession about 15 years ago I went to a psychologist. It was cool because he gave me super practical advice and the main takeaway was to get out there to have some fun again. My assignment was to pick something fun that I could just go do every day without a hassle or stress. I bought a remote control car and had a lot of fun just in front of my house with that thing. Before I knew it, I was at the playground by my house letting random kids take it for rips, which I really enjoyed.
Then back out for wing nights and slowly started getting well again.
There were other interesting things I had to do with this guy, like write letters to my dad and brother to get things off my chest, I guess? Anyway, obviously everyone's needs will be different and your mental health provider will have different approaches than mine, but hopefully you're able to find somebody that can help.
The neat thing about my experience was it only took four or five sessions and that was it. I was done. I still do a lot of the things I learned in those sessions, though. I still do cardio every day (that helps process stress), I meditate and I have fun as much as my energy level allows. There isn't a single weekend that goes by where I won't set aside some time for fun, though. It's mandatory. We'll even discuss in my house, 'what is going to be our fun thing this weekend?'. It's not optional; you need fun.
As for drugs, IDK, man. My friends and I are in our mid-40s and still do shrooms a few times a year and, of course, enjoy cannabis. Personally, I don't like tripping super hard on shrooms anymore, though. We probably take half of what we did in our 20s, except for my one friend, but he ended up hiding under a fataing towel outside in minus 30 like two guys' trips ago, so it's not without its risks.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cali Panthers Fan
Or...and hear me out here...we all matured and grew out of that phase.
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I don't think
not enjoying yourself is a sign of maturity. And having fun with your friends in a multitude of ways isn't a phase. If you have fun using drugs and hanging with your friends, you should absolutely fight against "maturing" out of that. We have one night a year where my buddies and I go to Banff (eight of us) and go completely overboard. It's the actual best time ever. We do mini-nights like that throughout the year, too, but that one main trip is where we go crazy.
We're not immature, either. Bankers, teacher, gov't employees, O&G guys, couple business owners, etc. All have families, kids and all the other things. We just know how to have fun still.
We actively keep guys that don't know how to have fun at an arm's length from us. You know the kind...boring dinner parties, polite conversation, no big laughs...fata that.