Quote:
Originally Posted by GGG
I think you just need to understand and not resent anyone who chooses not to go for whatever reason. If close family says I can’t give up the money/vacation time that shouldn’t create years of resentment in you.
The other thing is if parts will be outdoors have a backup for bad weather
Understand what parts of the ceremony/reception will be private and what is in public areas like beaches. If an old guy in a Speedo in the ocean right behind where your ceremony is happening will be an issue discuss that with the resort.
Establish early what expectations of togetherness with your guests are. If you want just the ceremony together and then being off alone make sure that’s clear. Alternatively if you expect everyone to be hanging out with you the whole time make that clear.
The big thing is that everyone’s expectations of what a destination wedding is are different so making sure it’s understood amoung the guests is important.
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Personal experience with 3 destination weddings as a guest:
1) Dominican Republic All-Inclusive resort: the couple had a coordinator at Air Canada vacations and pretty much everyone worked with that coordinator and had the same flights. The package cost was a few hundred more than what it would've been for me to book on my own at the time I was looking. I have no idea where that price difference was, whether it was towards the coordinator, or supplementing the executive suite the couple got, or what. Weddding was on day 4 of 7 so the first few days were a lot of prep work for the couple then we pretty much spent the rest of the time together as a big group, including excursions.
2) Maui, Hawaii. The couple gave details of where to stay, and had a group rate. I opted to pick a place through VRBO which ended up being the same place somehow lol. Check-in through VRBO seemed to be a bit more cumbersome than those who stayed through the group rate. I think it was a resort that was part hotel, part time-shares. Everyone seemed to be in/out on different flights. We only saw the couple on two days. The wedding day (ceremony and reception) and a separate day where the bride arranged for a group rate at a Luau. They spent most of the their stay doing prep, and then a family vacation with both families.
3) San Jose, CA. The couple is originally from Calgary, only on a temporary work commitment there. 95% of the guests were from here. They arranged for a hotel with a group rate, where you could make your own booking. The hotel was also the shuttle pickup/dropoff for wedding ceremony. Other than that, no other arrangements were made for/with guests. We only saw the couple on the wedding day.
For all the above, I'm fortunate to be a friend from a group of friends.
I also saw how any of these situations above were different for the "I only know the groom from work, and don't know any of his other friends" attendees who aren't very social to interact with other guests, and weren't too keen on the specific destination as a "vacation".