[kermitology]

Hoooooo-boy.. do I feel you on this one sir.

I moved from Calgary to Victoria in June 2020. I had a good group of core friends, lived next door to one of my closest friends - they had kids that were 7 and 4 months older than my kids. Spent every Sunday with another couple with kids the same age as mine, and my best friend lived down the street from that couple. I had 2 other guys that I would go out with regularly just to hang out, go for a bike ride and have a beer.

Since moving, I've kind of been forced into a secluded life. People in Victoria are not the most welcoming people. Preference is given to those born in Victoria, then born on Vancouver Island, then regressively less accepted the further you are from Victoria.

I've had a hard time making new friends (something I'm really good at) in this environment coupled with Covid. I put myself out there though. The usual thought is to just say no to new interactions - they take a lot of energy for a lot of people, but it doesn't really help at the end of the day. Even introverts still need human interaction, as draining as it can be.

My best method of trying to build a community here has been through Twitter. I realize that sounds completely insane, but I picked a community to build using Twitter, in my case it was for cycling. Before I moved I posted to my #yycbike crowd asking for who are good people involved in the cycling community in Victoria and have made several acquaintances through that action. One guy lent me a cargo bike to try out and to help me convince my wife to buy one. I've met a number of those people in person, and I hope that when Covid does ramp down that I can cultivate those into deeper friendships.

Good luck to you, but remember that any relationship requires effort from both parties in order to be successful. There are people out there willing to spend time with you, I promise.