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Originally Posted by mrkajz44
Curious for those that have experience with this - how early is too early to be concerned? Our son is almost 3 and seems to be having some major issues with pre-school that he started this fall. He'll hide under a table for 5-10 minutes at the start of each day until the teachers coax him out. On non-school days he actively asks about having to go to school and gets pretty upset thinking about it. We were thinking this is more than just normal separation anxiety type stuff, but don't want to go overboard if he's just adjusting slower than other kids (an "excuse" I'm using is he's one of the youngest kids there, so maybe that is a factor?)
For those that found out about mental issues with their kids, how early was it diagnosed? We've heard early intervention is important so we obviously want to identify any potential problems as soon as we can. I still think we might be a little alarmist at this point though and don't want to jump to conclusions.
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I work with young children with special needs, mostly developmental delays. I wouldn't say be alarmed, or there's definitely a problem, but I don't think it hurts to look into it. If you don't already have a paediatrician, ask your family doctor for a referral to a developmental paediatrician. Another option to look into is Collaborative Mental Health.
Age can definitely play a factor. In all my years in the field, I have come across a handful of children who do well being the youngest in the class. The vast majority definitely benefit from being one of the older ones. A lot of parents consider their child being the youngest in kindergarten / grade one, which can be a challenge. Often an even bigger challenge though is during middle school and high school, when they are less mature, going through puberty later, etc.
If he's worried about going to school, that sounds like a bit of anxiety. It might just be that there's another child he's scared of or the teacher's style just isn't a match for him. Some simple suggestions to try: give him a photo of the family that he can keep in his backpack or somewhere else at school; make a calendar for his wall at home showing the days he goes to school and the days he's home; ask the teacher if there's something (not a toy that all the other kids will really, really want) that he can bring with him to school that reminds him of home.
If it was me though, I would absolutely start with the developmental paediatrician. If there's nothing to be concerned about, you are reassured. If there's something that should be looked into, now is the best time to do so.