oh man - so sorry to hear this.
i can't help you at all with your questions.
i went thru this almost 4 years ago with my dad - it sucked... and honestly, it still sucks.
i started a thread after we found out his diagnosis looking for ideas/suggestions from others who have already been down this road and honestly it was a huge help.
https://forum.calgarypuck.com/showthread.php?t=159736