Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch
With the care giver, in this case my dad. The situation changes daily. On some days he wakes up to a stranger, and scary situations and he gets exhausted and tired, and he's ready to talk about the next steps which is extended care for both. The next day he puts his footdown, they're not going, he's got it handled, its just rapidly switching because he fears that lose of control or personal freedom or he's afraid he and my mom will be forcibly separated as her condition gets worse. You have to be clear and honest. For example if something happens to him, none of us kids has the capacity to take in our mom and properly take care of her. That's just facts. If mom gets worse, that decision of where she goes or what happens gets taken out of his hands, just because this disease can create really emotional to dangerous to baffling situations.
That's all I've got.
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This is what we are dealing with where one day the reality is brutal and the next day "we can do this!", or several days of bad. It all spills into the other family relationships, which unfortunately involve avoidance from many and a total lack of pragmatism which seems to be headed towards a "worser-case" situation where suddenly one day something significant happens, the person is removed (and/or injured), and no proactive legal steps have been taken. The affected persons adult children are frozen from emotion and lack of knowledge, yet still pray and expect some overnight miracle cure. And yet here I am unwillingly on the sidelines with no voice and literally un-invited yet it's clear as day to me as I see the multi-generational paternal oriented disfunction perpetuated. Just another thing to add to an already overloaded state of affairs.