[CaptainCrunch]

Once every generation a new messiah arrives. The last since Messiah the head of the church of Kiprusoftian retired to a quiet life of contemplation and fighting the blood monsters of the Fehildian fog shrouded fjords while devouring the souls of non believers.



But yeh, a new chosen one shall arise to pick up the flock that had followed such false profits as the Boucher, Smith and the Elliot, who came to us with promises of miracles but left us fast first in the mud if inadequate goaltending.



And so the new savior the Jacob strode to the ice and faced the anticipated and said "Raise your eyes and look upon me as I will protect the sacred goal, and lead us across the long journey to glory. Do not despair when you look upon the jerseys of the enemies, the Oilers, and the Canucks and the Jets for I will repel their attacks with righteousness and remorselessness reserved for those no good non believers."


For there is only one commandment in the church of Jacob, though foul pucks shalt not pass.