[undercoverbrother]

Start drinking heavily and doing hard drugs.

Pursue this until it becomes serious issue in your life. So much so that an intervention is held for you, those people that attend are your friends.

Added bonus, new friends from rehab through a common bond & experience.

Double added bonus, if sobriety turns out to be less enjoyable than being lit up, you know have friends to get stoned and drunk with.

Win Win Double Win.